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Barry... You're somewhat disturbed, yes?.
You posted alt. flame at one point if I remember correctly which makes you cool by me but I get this feeling that your daytime job is Insurance agent or rental cars.

I'm not taking a shot at you, as a matter of fact I'd really like to introduce you to Charin and BDM. I'm sensing a triumvirate of fiber kinda vibe here.



Yes, somewhat disturbed. Depression with a healthy dose of anxiety. I pretty much hate myself and often wish for death. On the other hand most of my panic attacks manifest themselves in fears that I'm having a heart attack. I'm a firm believer that the only thing that's stopped me from splattering my brains on the wall is that I'd miss what happens on wrestling next week. I've always pretty much done the sad clown thing as a cover for my fears and insecurities. But I know who I am, and I know I have weird thoughts. And I fight them every day. And I try not to let it define me. Although I think to a certain extent it does. Kind of makes for a perpetual motion machine of self hatred and shame.

I've only used the "Barry" handle for the last year or so. I used to post alot on alt.swingers, rec.sports.pro.wrestling (or something like that), a porn newsgroup whose name fails me and a few others depending on what my hobbies were at the time. Never on alt.flame tho.

Not a salesman of any kind. Even in my little side gig, I get really nervous going into shops to sell my wares. I'm just a really smart underachiever who has never been able to apply those smarts to anything worthwhile.

I post here because it seems like a fairly bright collection of degenerates. I really appreciate the humor here. It's a very entertaining forum.

Venting my spleen,

Barry
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Having killed someone doesn't make you a killer- @KINGROCHE