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I just quizzed my dad on this (he's an expert on Greek and Roman history) and he said it was only considered shameful if one was the recipient of the act-- i.e. the one being penetrated.



One of the (probably false) allegations made against Julius Caesar by one of his detractors was that he allowed himself to be penetrated by one of his lieutenants.



It was said of Caesar that he was "every woman's husband and every man's wife" but as you stated, most historians believe this to have been a slander.

And Holly's father is right, in ancient Rome it was perfectly acceptable for a man to have sex with another man if he was in the "top" role, the bottom though, was considered unmanly.