The bottle of white porto I ordered came in to the shop today. I didn't even know it existed and I think red porto is fucking gross sweet. This white porto isn't bad at all.

The vineyard has a website but I warn you that it is absolutely insane. Like either 10 web developers were asked to work on different bits and they attempted to fit it together or 1 dude who was fueled by porto made the whole thing.

Calem Porto

I have the "fine white" type which doesn't seem to be mentioned. But it was bottled in 2004.

Just for a glimpse of what the web CAN be you might want to look but don't say I didn't warn you that it is absolutely crazy.

Review: Apparently the Portuguese like this with some club soda and lime.

I found the lime pretty unnecessary.

Go for something sour to balance the sweet. A little soda and a sour cocktail onion is pretty darn good.

Next up is a splash of sauerkraut juice.

The bottle suggests serving it with cake or fruit. I have some cookies and a cantaloupe so I may edit this later.

I dunno, for imported fortified wine "Calem Porto Fine White Porto" is not bad at all or mind-numbingly sweet. So if porto interests you but you prefer drier wines give it a shot. But despite the suggestion of cake and fruit I would not call this as much of a dessert or aperitif wine as a traditional porto. But again, it's a fortified wine so you should already know what's up.

Also, I think might start eating these sour cocktail onions as a snack. Crunchy, salty, sour. Pretty fuckin good.

EDIT: I looked at the web site again and if you can imagine what a web site would look like if it were designed by 15 different people who didn't speak the same language or have access to what anyone else was doing and WHO ALSO HAPPENED TO HATE THE WEB and anyone who attempts to use it then this is your dream. Just be prepared, in some ways it is totally awesome how fucky it is but it is also a sensory assault. The best part is that on top of being utterly crazy it is also EXTREMELY technically proficient.

I may actually be more into into this web site than I am into this wine.

Just... well just look at it. And then report back if you think that it was produced by people who hate the internet, hate web sites, hate computers, hate all bipeds, hate sounds, hate looking at anything. This site is like a straight man seeing a beautiful pair of tits and getting sickened and vomiting. just, just, what the fuck?

If anybody makes any sense of this or can even find where they mention their "Fine White Porto" please please report back.