I bought a bottle of Laphroaig a couple of weeks back thinking it would taste like....well....Scotch. Instead it reminded me of the antibiotics they clean your skin with before surgury. It was so hideous, I only drank a sip or two of it. I bet one of my friends $50 that he couldnt finish a whole glass of the stuff in 10 minutes and he just barely made it.

Next time at the liquor store, I asked the girl working to recommend a good Scotch. And, of course, she turned out to be Irish. So instead, she recommended her favorite Irish Whiskey. Clontarf. And it's endorsed by lesbians.