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#298403 - 02/03/08 01:57 PM
Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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The news of Lela Star’s self-inflicted disfiguration sent waves of disgust through the porn viewing world and catapulted Boner-One to a level of fanboidom previously thought unattainable. Here was a whore with a near-perfect rack, which nicely compensated for some of her, ummmm, deficiencies. In one fell swoop, she threw it away forever.
This got me thinking: Out of the thousands of pairs out there, which whore has the most god-awful set of Bolt-Ons in the industry? I mean the most hideous, unnecessary and unappetizing pair of mangled mammaries in the biz. And who better to answer the question that the Award Nominated Preverts of XXX Porn Talk?
I decided against doing a poll, since, by their very structure, they tend to suggest their own answers and I wanted to gauge people’s immediate, gut reaction to the question. Additionally, polls are far too easily rigged, and you don’t need the proverbial â€army of alts†to do it. So I PM’ed what I thought was a reasonable cross-section of XPT posters representing a wide variety of tastes. The results were not entirely surprising:
At 45%, Danielle Derek was the runaway favorite, both in terms of number of votes and in terms of being posters’ first choice. Many posters included links to previous threads involving this poster child for recyclable materials. Surprisingly, though, nobody mentioned her unseemly ass implants. Perhaps the horror was too overwhelming.
As CAOH once described her: “Unsettling. Disgusting. Ridiculous. Horrifying. â€
Close upon Danielle’s heels is the beast known as GEN X. Most respondents, however, couldn’t remember her name. They called her “Horseface†or “ the freak who hangs out with Sal McGay.†or “the Mick Jagger looking skank from Malice’s office.†Just goes to show that you don’t need a memorable name to make a lasting impression.
Brianna Banks was another fan favorite. Rather than belabor the point, I’ll let the picture speak for itself:
While lesser lights like Wendy Whoppers, Candy Mason and Savannah Gold each received a few nods, XPT mainstays Anita Cannibal and Pam Peaks curiously received just one vote each.
One industry insider who declined to be named (beyond pointing out that it was not Darth) cast his only ballot for Echo Valley. I actually had to Google this one, and, suffice it to say, I’m amazed there were no other votes cast for this… person.
Some respondents simply could not name a specific whore. As one poster put it: Sorry, dude. I know ‘em when i see ‘em but i really dislike those bloated fake tits so i tend to ignore the name of the chick bearing them. If I see them in a flick I tend not to watch it.â€
Said another: I find that I am a lot more forgiving of boob jobs if I have never seen the girl pre-enhancement… However, when a girl with exquisite natural breasts decides to go and get a completely unrequired boob job (regardless of the quality of the surgeons' work) then it pisses me off. All boob jobs are bad, but their badness is inversely proportionate to the natural attractiveness of the girl. If a girl I have no interest in gets huge, fake bowling ball implants, I couldn't give a fuck, but when Sunny Leone, Lela Star, Katsumi etc. get them, then it becomes a crime against nature in my opinion.â€
Finally, there was the inevitable proponent of Bad Boobs. There’s always one in every crowd: “ I actually love fake bolt ons, in fact, the more fake they are the more I like em, something about a whore willing to deface herself in the pursuit of being a sex object just turns me on… Chelsea Charms is my favorite, many would say her tits are abnormal, me I think they are just too damn small, I love the way her nipples point to the side because they are so stretched out and fucked up!â€
By The Numbers:
Danielle Derek: 8 votes
Gen X.: 6 votes
Briana Banks: 3 votes
Wendy Whoppers: 2 votes
Savannah Gold: 2 votes
Candy Mason: 2 votes
Echo Valley: 1 vote
Anita Cannibal: 1 vote
Pamela Peaks: 1 vote
Kaitlin Ashley: 1 vote
Leah Wild: 1 vote
Lovette: 1 vote
Daphne Rosen: 1 vote
Chelsea Charms: 1 vote
Attachments
289182-6.jpg (75 downloads)
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#298404 - 02/03/08 02:20 PM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 4856
Loc: The 4th International
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Thanks for the work you put in this! I didn't know this Danielle, but at least she retains some female looks. However, Quote:
What The Fuck Is This? Tell me you used PhotoShop on this!
Damn, another nightmare-filled night ahead of me.....
_________________________
The only thing you got that I want, is your suffering.
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#298407 - 02/03/08 04:21 PM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Kurt Lackwood's Fluffer
Registered: 01/09/06
Posts: 1248
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Wow, I've never seen Briana Banks before the implants. She looked really good.
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#298408 - 02/03/08 04:23 PM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Quote:
Wow, I've never seen Briana Banks before the implants. She looked really good.
Didn't she? She kinda looks like Buffy the Vampire Fluffer in the after picture. What a waste.
BTW: Freestylah, use the search function. That photo was not re-touched in the slightest.
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#298411 - 02/03/08 08:52 PM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Internet Tough Guy
Registered: 07/14/06
Posts: 775
Loc: Hollywood, CA
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Quote:
Quote:
Chelsea Charms is my favorite, many would say her tits are abnormal, me I think they are just too damn small...
i'm betting on christian for this one
Hmm...I bet this person finds these 2 a total turnon YUM!
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#298412 - 02/03/08 10:09 PM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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...And one late vote for JASMINE TAME
Attachments
289277-jasmine.jpg (46 downloads)
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#298413 - 02/04/08 04:43 AM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 05/18/06
Posts: 3555
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can't believe no one has mentioned ms. bitoni :
_________________________
"I'm going to spend the rest of the weekend deep frying the fuck out of anything that gets in my way."
--Handful
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#298414 - 02/04/08 05:00 AM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 4856
Loc: The 4th International
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#298416 - 02/04/08 08:01 AM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 03/28/04
Posts: 4450
Loc: The Planet Houston
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Quote:
Quote:
BTW: Freestylah, use the search function. That photo was not re-touched in the slightest.
OK, I use the search function:
1st try: Gen X --> nothing useful
Check "the girls of Tony Malice's Office" thread or a Sal Mcvey one...She's in there somewhere...
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#298420 - 02/04/08 05:38 PM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Internet Tough Guy
Registered: 07/14/06
Posts: 775
Loc: Hollywood, CA
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Quote:
I don't know this whore's name but GOD DAMN!
Her areolas (or areolae for you Latin experts) look like they were stitched on by Dr. Frankenstien
Sabrina, look at that body, the perfect female form!!!
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#298421 - 02/04/08 06:15 PM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/16/05
Posts: 329
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Quote:
Quote:
I don't know this whore's name but GOD DAMN!
Her areolas (or areolae for you Latin experts) look like they were stitched on by Dr. Frankenstien
Sabrina, look at that body, the perfect female form!!!
Other than the hideous tits, she has a killer body and a pretty enough face but what in the world would possess her to do that to her tits is beyond me
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#298422 - 02/04/08 06:59 PM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 12/21/07
Posts: 187
Loc: Inside A Technocolored Padded ...
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#298424 - 02/07/08 09:18 AM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 01/21/08
Posts: 353
Loc: Illinois, US, Earth,
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Quote:
Quote:
I don't know this whore's name but GOD DAMN!
Her areolas (or areolae for you Latin experts) look like they were stitched on by Dr. Frankenstien
If I was more skilled at photo editing I could turn this into a picture of Bender from Futurama . I'm sure with a little effort you can imagine it. Just use the boobs as the eyes and the bikini tan line as the mouth.
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#298429 - 02/07/08 03:12 PM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Quote:
Who's the whore? Too bad about those boobs.
Co-sign. What a fucking waste of a whore.
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#298430 - 02/07/08 06:37 PM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 12/21/07
Posts: 187
Loc: Inside A Technocolored Padded ...
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#298432 - 02/08/08 04:17 AM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 4856
Loc: The 4th International
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#298437 - 02/08/08 11:21 PM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 1946
Loc: Outer Space
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Am I crazy or does she look a little like Chloe Jones?
_________________________
I really try to retain a respectful distance from my models, even when I'm lubing up their pussies.
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#298438 - 02/09/08 01:25 AM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Whoremaster
Registered: 10/21/05
Posts: 2710
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Quote:
Am I crazy or does she look a little like Chloe Jones?
Nope...I thought (and still think) it is Chloe Jones.
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#298439 - 02/09/08 02:20 AM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/16/05
Posts: 329
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
This set gets my vote.
malpractice lawsuit waiting to happen.. that is just wrong
It's the three fingered claw on her left hand that has me worried. Bitch must be part sloth, no???
in a heart beat bad boob job be damned.
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#298440 - 02/09/08 11:19 AM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Quote:
Quote:
Am I crazy or does she look a little like Chloe Jones?
Nope...I thought (and still think) it is Chloe Jones.
Where's Moblem when you really need him?
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#298442 - 02/10/08 03:03 PM
Re: Superbowl Sunday Survey: Bad Boobjobs…
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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Like moblem would use condoms.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#298445 - 03/17/08 05:37 PM
Re:bad boobjobs--about my boobs
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Pervert
Registered: 04/21/04
Posts: 2204
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Quote:
I saw MikeSouth's post about me..I don't know who he is, and I wouldn't care to know him..I know what I have to do to get it fixed..my surgery had nothing to do with my scars..When I get a cut, my body forms keloids. If I had known that, then I wouldn't have gotten cut underneath my breasts. Yes, I have skin problems, yes I do porn, yes I fuck strangers, yes I fuck for money, yes I live my life... yes yes yes yes...so what's up?
jt you one copy and paste fuckin ho.
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