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#165569 - 05/07/06 06:28 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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That's rude, man! Kelly denies that she does meth and I honestly doubt she does meth. She just seems really into her work and a nice girl. Unless you can prove shit like that, don't accuse someone! It's not cool!
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#165570 - 05/07/06 06:35 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/26/03
Posts: 8160
Loc: Roma, Repubblica Italiana
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#165571 - 05/07/06 07:00 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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Kelly has said she's escorted, true...but I don't buy the meth rumors. Sorry. And I'd still marry her if she was an addict, in the hope I could help her. She's incredible!
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#165572 - 05/07/06 07:27 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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aka Gen Padova
Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/20/03
Posts: 4517
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Quote:
Kelly has said she's escorted, true...but I don't buy the meth rumors. Sorry. And I'd still marry her if she was an addict, in the hope I could help her. She's incredible!
(she is a smart, nice girl... it'd be heart breaking that she'd fuck strangers for rocks and powder)
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#165574 - 05/07/06 07:35 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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I agree totally that she's a smart, nice girl, Gen...you're pretty cool yourself, and I'm glad you're feeling better. I've never gotten the sense that Kelly does meth, ever. We've spoken a few times and I've always gotten the sense she's a smart, artistic girl with a good head for business and a sense of her self-worth in this industry. I see her ability to be sexually extreme as sort of equal to a stuntman or stuntwoman...she knows that is worth more money and, as she enjoys her job, is willing to go further than most. It's sad how some people equate a slim body and extreme behavior with meth use. As far as I can see, it's bullshit rumors like when they said she was dating Skeeter (although I do think she has a boyfriend, sadly). But as for me, I'd marry her in a second, man. (And Gen, I always also kind of crushed on you...not as much as Kel, but you're a brave, funny gal.) Odd in a business like this that one can have secret admirers, no?  
And as far as:
Kelly is good, but you might want to make sure she fucks the same way privately that she does in porn. The irony would be hilarious if she was privately a lights-out, missionary only, and under three blankets type of girl.
I wouldn't be surprised if she's a lot quieter and a hell of a lot more romantic. That's the impression I've gotten when we just shot the shit on the occasions we did...which I find oddly even more attractive. She's a nice girl who does extreme sex for a living. Hell, I'd marry her. Seriously.
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#165575 - 05/07/06 07:53 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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aka Gen Padova
Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/20/03
Posts: 4517
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It's because chances are the ill skinny who can take a merciless plunging usually are intoxicated somehow or another. But that doesn't mean there's some out there who don't do the same completely sober. While I did my anal stuff sober, I wouldn't say any of it was merciless plunging... actually none of it ever amounts to a lot of the hardcore stunt girls today. But damn, giving up any poo-hole is what they wanna do, by God go for it.  I still think Gia has the best one so far. No offense to Kelly at all.
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#165577 - 05/07/06 09:05 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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I disagree. I think Kelly's great - a really cool person and probably the greatest adult actress to come along in a long time. And I am not exaggerating in the slightest - I totally crush on her everytime we talk and I totally would marry her. Being kind to someone and expressing affection and attraction is not a waste of space. Don't like it? Look somewhere else...
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#165581 - 05/07/06 09:34 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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 Willie D. --- Monkey Man/The Rolling Stones I’m a fleabit peanut monkey All my friends are junkies That’s not really true I’m a cold italian pizza I could use a lemon squeezer What you do? But I’ve been bit and I’ve been tossed around By every she-rat in this town Have you, babe, too? Well, I am just a monkey man I’m glad you are a monkey woman too I was bitten by a boar I was gouged and I was gored But I pulled on through Yes, I’m a sack of broken eggs I always have an unmade bed Don’t you? Well, I hope we’re not too messianic Or a trifle too satanic We love to play the blues Well I am just a monkey man I’m glad you are a monkey, monkey woman too, babe I’m a monkey I’m a monkey I’m a monkey man I’m a monkey man I’m a monkey... Kelly Wells Rocks!
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#165583 - 05/07/06 09:44 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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Ok...explain to me why there is this double standard where guys can do whatever we want to as many women as we want - and yeah, I've been around - but a woman can't? Yeah, I'd marry Kelly and NOT look down on her for stuff she did, whether for pleasure or work. She's been tested and so have her partners - whereas I didn't have to have an HIV test before every woman I slept with. So who's more questionable? A porn star who had what we consider "extreme" sex in a controlled environment or those of us out there just having sex. I don't hold my girlfriend's past partners against them, just as I hope they don't hold mine against me. I'm also secure enough to know they're with me because they want to be with me, and whatever they did in the past - or do at work - is something else altogether. Quit treating actresses like they're something to look down on. That's like asking whether you'd date Angelina Jolie after she kissed Brad Pitt in a movie...it was a job. I think Kelly's great as a person and I totally crush on her.
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#165585 - 05/07/06 09:56 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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Nope. Just a friend. We shoot the shit every now and again. Clever use of that Starbucks metaphor, though...the old "extra cream" pun for semen hasn't been used, like, a thousand times, has it? And actually, I just broke up with someone - not Kelly - but have crushed on her for a while. Of course, you're on here as a brief respite from all the women beating down your door, n'est pas?
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#165587 - 05/07/06 10:10 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Human Garbage
Registered: 09/13/05
Posts: 1594
Loc: The "Phlogbox", apparently.
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Quote:
Ok...explain to me why there is this double standard where guys can do whatever we want to as many women as we want - and yeah, I've been around - but a woman can't?
It probably has something to do with th eprospect of being a knocked-up single mom with a bastard child. Watch an episode of Maury Povich and see what happens when these women have to DNA test an entire Marine batallion to find out who the father is.
This is also one of the few double standards that works in favor of men, so don't fuck it up. By my tally:
Women over men:
Hiring quotas, sexual harassment lawsuits, custody disputes, selective service registration, and a million other things.
Men over women:
Okay to be promiscuous.
Also: If you hang out with her...ask her out! Do it! Now!
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#165588 - 05/07/06 10:13 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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Dude, I doubt if marriage would ever happen. She'd probably shoot me down, and also she has a boyfriend, I think. But I just felt the need to get on here and probably make an ass of myself by letting her know she has a secret admirer, something which was most in style in 4th grade on Valentine's Day.
Why be afraid? Why is a porn star more suspect than any woman you date? That woman you meet on MySpace could easily have AIDS - and is less likely to have been tested - while an adult actress not only has been tested, they are probably safer and probably more open to discussing matters emotional and sexual. It's just the stigma some of you have, where you'll wank to them but not love them. I feel sorry for that poor woman in Kentucky who got fired from teaching because she used to do porn. How pathetic the town and principal was for that! Fact is, if people judge someone that way, I look down on THEM, not the person they judge.
Kelly is a smart, sweet, quiet and nice girl. She just has sex on screen as an actress. It makes her money. She seems to me to be responsible, stable, punctual and professional. And yeah, I'd love her/marry her/do her/impregnate her and introduce her to the folks.
I think most all actresses are deserving of the same courtesy.
One more thing to the guy arguing about pregnancy and fatherhood...I know a graduate student here who just found out she was pregnant. She has NO IDEA who the father is because she pulled two trains at two different parties two days apart. She's no porn star. She just got drunk and got busy. I'd suspect adult actresses are a lot more careful about birth control than your average party girl.
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#165591 - 05/07/06 10:32 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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Again, who's to say the girl you pick up in a bar doesn't have a history where she dated a guy with a horsecock who could go for hours? Chances are, even if you're above average, some of your lovers have had bigger. So you have to be better. And I doubt the way porn is filmed - lighting, changing in positions, awkward scenarios - that the sex is always as great as it seems. Remember, some of it is ACTING. I had a fling with one adult actress whom I know did one of the biggest cocks in the business...she was still VERY tight and she was nothing in bed like she was in the movies...which was actually nice. Insecurity prevents us from doing a lot of things we should. And before you say, yeah, well why not ask out Kelly...cause I'm 90 percent sure she's taken. If I knew she was single, I'd try in a minute, hoss, rejection or no.
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#165593 - 05/07/06 10:40 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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For another example, I find Gen Padova quite sexy because she's funny, self-deprecating (with no cause to be) and brave for fighting cancer, even in the face of some people making ignorant comments about her during it. I lost some family to cancer and I totally admire Gen for being such a cool, fun lady having faced that shit at such a young age.
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#165594 - 05/07/06 10:48 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/20/05
Posts: 9181
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Quote:
Willie D. ---
I know that's you, Smiling Arab. Hamilton Steele my Irish ass.
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#165595 - 05/07/06 10:50 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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Nope. Call me Doc. You ain't never seen the likes of me around these parts before, Willie D.
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#165596 - 05/07/06 10:50 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Human Garbage
Registered: 09/13/05
Posts: 1594
Loc: The "Phlogbox", apparently.
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Quote:
One more thing to the guy arguing about pregnancy and fatherhood...I know a graduate student here who just found out she was pregnant. She has NO IDEA who the father is because she pulled two trains at two different parties two days apart. She's no porn star. She just got drunk and got busy. I'd suspect adult actresses are a lot more careful about birth control than your average party girl.
I'd like to believe that. It's intuitive, but you need to take into account the following factors:
1.) 
2.) 
3.) 
Unfortunately for you, Kelly probably thinks of you as a friend, which dramatically drops your chances of getting to bang her. Study your Tom Leykis, dude.
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#165597 - 05/07/06 10:54 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Rob Black's Crack Pipe
Registered: 02/13/06
Posts: 56
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Quote:
A lot of girls in the biz are tiny. Majority of guys aren't all too big, maybe length wise but with a tiny frame and an average dick makes the average dick look slightly larger. Of course there's the handful of guys who are larger than the average but they're certainly not the common. Those uncommon tend to be more popular due to its rarity.
Also... stereotypes never get the ignorant very far. Oh well.
I did not know a lot of porn girls were tiny. I haven't been to a convention yet so I don't know what they look like in person.
By the way, are you saying I'm ignorant, Gen? I hope that wasn't a shot at me. I think I am very open-minded.
By the way Gen, what is up with your avatar? It is always something gruesome.
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#165598 - 05/07/06 10:54 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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Dude, what part of "I think she has a boyfriend" did you not catch? I just felt like saying I liked her. And as far as Tom Leykis, some of us have parlayed "friend" into a lot more. Just depends on whether you let yourself be neutered or not. I got attacked one night by a girl "friend" who'd kept me as a standby for years, as soon as I started showing strong interest in someone else. The paradigm is constantly shifting, my friend. And I don't know what Kelly considers me as...as I said, I think she's taken, and I think she prefers black men. I could be wrong, but I just think she's cute and cool. Hence, I wanted her to know in a very Joanna Angel digs James Deen kind of way.
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#165601 - 05/07/06 11:17 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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I don't know that she would have me...but as far as reasons? Let's see. 1.) I'm not a judgemental prick who treats adult film actresses like diseased and disgraced orifices who are here for our wanking pleasure and verbal abuse, as some do. 2.) I think porn OK, but at the same time I haven't actually bought/rented a porn film since before Kelly started doing movies. Just never had the need. 3.) I don't give a shit what narrowminded people think, and if I do date an adult actress and someone gives her a hard time, I mock them openly. 4.) I'm far from a "tard" - I actually have several years of graduate school, a few degrees, and am pretty acclaimed in my field, which is not porn but does have something marginally to do with porn. 5.) I seem to do OK with women. I was raised by women, and every break-up I've had has been amicable. Many of my girlfriends are still friends of mine, and there have been some instances where we hooked up and reunited down the road. 6.) I actually remember birthdays and send flowers. I'm a nice guy but not a wimp. I read as many sex ed books as I could when I was a kid, and I was talking my girlfriends into anal sex - which they actually still say they enjoyed because we did it right - back in the mid-80s, when many of my friends couldn't get any of that. Does any of this matter for shit? Nah. Kelly likes who she likes, and as I said SHE PROBABLY HAS A BOYFRIEND. I just think she's the most adorable woman to come down the pike in a long time, and so I wanted to praise her accordingly. Sorry if that conflicts with anyone's take on these girls as addicted, diseased cum dumpsters worthy solely of our scorn. Remember to use Lubriderm or your penis will get honeymoon burn, professional wankers. And keep saving up...one day those hookers on the corner won't point and laugh at you  .
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#165603 - 05/07/06 11:25 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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Brilliant riposte, Willie! Wow, Jay Leno will be calling any second to hire you as a writer.
Wait, what am I saying? Jay Leno sucks and is unfunny. He might actually hire you.
And bans don't frighten me; one, I wasn't saying anything that bad, so a ban is damn silly...and two, I have a life, so I'll just go find other stuff to do.
(Like have sex with an actual female, something many around here evidently know nothing about.)
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#165605 - 05/07/06 11:36 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Human Garbage
Registered: 09/13/05
Posts: 1594
Loc: The "Phlogbox", apparently.
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Quote:
Dude, what part of "I think she has a boyfriend" did you not catch?
If you were serious about fucking her, that wouldn't matter.
Quote:
...and I think she prefers black men.
Ever see a minstrel show? You aren't out of options yet.
On the serious side: Why bother if her coalburner tendencies exclude you from getting up her ass? At least you know it's her and not you. You should move on, bro.
Earn some money, find some better slut, and have a good laugh ten years down the road when you're living well and she's used up her porn cash, her body has fallen to shit, and she's living off welfare wondering when her "Babies' Daddy be?"
Purely to offend the n00b, enjoy this educational and ultra politically incorrect cartoon:
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#165606 - 05/07/06 11:37 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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aka Gen Padova
Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/20/03
Posts: 4517
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Quote:
I did not know a lot of porn girls were tiny. I haven't been to a convention yet so I don't know what they look like in person.
By the way, are you saying I'm ignorant, Gen? I hope that wasn't a shot at me. I think I am very open-minded.
By the way Gen, what is up with your avatar? It is always something gruesome.
No, wasn't directed towards you. Just towards the general ig-nits that know they are ig-nit.
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#165607 - 05/07/06 11:37 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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Definition of irony:
Guy steps in insulting a poster. Poster retorts and returns fire, mocking him openly by calling him a chronically celibate masturbator...which in this place is like making altar boy jokes at the Vatican. Guy then realizes he has stepped into the ring with the proverbial Muhammad Ali of insults and snaps. Guy then threatens to ban him.
Here's my theory: Y'all need to get laid for real. All this deep-seated anger toward women, and porn stars who provide your edification and enjoyment, is just pure misogyny and hatred brought on by the fact that in most cases, a woman's not touched your penis in decades. Get laid and a lot of that anger may dissipate.
In any case - in case I'm banned - Kelly, you rock. Hang in there, baby, and don't let the bastards grind you down.
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#165610 - 05/07/06 11:44 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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Dude, what part of "I think she has a boyfriend" did you not catch? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If you were serious about fucking her, that wouldn't matter. I reply: Yeah, sorry...I have ethics. And I seriously doubt you've ever been in a place where you could steal a girl away from any guy... Quote: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ...and I think she prefers black men. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ever see a minstrel show? You aren't out of options yet. On the serious side: Why bother if her coalburner tendencies exclude you from getting up her ass? At least you know it's her and not you. You should move on, bro. Earn some money, find some better slut, and have a good laugh ten years down the road when you're living well and she's used up her porn cash, her body has fallen to shit, and she's living off welfare wondering when her "Babies' Daddy be?" Purely to offend the n00b, enjoy this educational and ultra politically incorrect cartoon: I reply: Cripes, how racist can you be, bozo? I say "I think she likes black guys" in the same way I would say "I like blondes" and you turn it into some R.Crumb cartoon assaulting every black person - and any white woman who dates them - with bullshit stereotypes. Join the 20th Century. Are bloodstains hard to get out of those white sheets, David Duke? 
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#165611 - 05/07/06 11:46 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Ed Hardy Wearing Loser
Registered: 05/07/06
Posts: 35
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You said I was banned, Willie, so I typed a reply to see if I was. It's like Norman Mailer said "A Democracy is a tyranny whose boundaries are undefined, and which can only be discovered by going as far as one can in a direction until stopped."
Norman Mailer, of course, is somebody you've probably never heard of.
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#165613 - 05/07/06 11:54 PM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Human Garbage
Registered: 09/13/05
Posts: 1594
Loc: The "Phlogbox", apparently.
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Quote:
I reply: Cripes, how racist can you be, bozo? I say "I think she likes black guys" in the same way I would say "I like blondes" and you turn it into some R.Crumb cartoon assaulting every black person - and any white woman who dates them - with bullshit stereotypes.
Join the 20th Century. Are bloodstains hard to get out of those white sheets, David Duke?
Yep...he's a PC White liberal. I vote for banning before he invites all his Rainbow Coalition, bongo-slapping, Prius-driving, Barbara Streisand-listening buddies to stink up the place. It's the "cockroach theory": if you see one, there are millions you don't see, so terminate with extreme prejudice.
Also: The 20th century ended a bit over six years ago. I'm kicking it in the 21st, spreading political incorrectness with every post. Run along before I do another pic defiling your precious little whore, who fucks anyone but YOU apparently.
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#165614 - 05/08/06 12:04 AM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/20/05
Posts: 9181
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Quote:
You said I was banned, Willie, so I typed a reply to see if I was. It's like Norman Mailer said "A Democracy is a tyranny whose boundaries are undefined, and which can only be discovered by going as far as one can in a direction until stopped."
Norman Mailer, of course, is somebody you've probably never heard of.
By now you can't see this...but
Is this the first-ever stick fight in the Fan Section? 
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#165615 - 05/08/06 12:05 AM
Re: Marry me, Kelly Wells!
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aka Gen Padova
Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/20/03
Posts: 4517
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Well I think I look best looking gruesomely murdered/dead. 
Not ever girl looks good in glam. I rather look dead than a drag queen in fake eye lashes LOL 
? 
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