Another oldie, but dirty:

Perverted Stories: Take A Walk On The Perverted Side
by Thor Hoarfrost

Since 1995, JM productions' Perverted Stories series
has been churning out the wildest, horniest & most
entertaining porn in the universe. Well, this January
at the AVN awards ceremony during CES 2000 in Vegas,
Perverted Stories walked away with statuettes for the
Best Vignette Series and Most Outrageous Sex Scene for
Perverted Stories 22: "The Devil Made Me Do It". While
the latter features a truly over the top performance
by dimunitive blonde fuck-machine Mila playing a gal
possesssed by the devil, there are many other standout
Perverted Stories vignettes released over the past few
years that were equally outrageous if not more.
Among these other standout scenes was the brilliant
and hilarious "Valley Of Dolls" from Perverted
Stories 20 and the boner hardening "Terror From The
Deep" vignette from Perverted Stories 25. The amazing
"Valley Of Dolls" scene features Allisyn Chaines
taking on a couple of ventiloquist dummies who fuck
her with dildo dicks and amazingly enough, it works.
The storyline has Allisyn playing a PA on a set
looking around for props when she's accosted in the
back room by a couple of dolls with attitudes. She
can't believe her eyes and ears and eventually they
talk her into sucking their dicks, which just so
happen to be dildos. What did you expect them to use?
Sure, it sounds like a real stretch, but when you
view it you'd be just as intrigued as folks like
Howard Stern & Jon Stewart, as the video was plugged
on both shows for good reason because it's an out of
the ordinary X-rated viewing experience. The dialogue
is comical and the sex is passable for what they're
aiming for and Allisyn Chaines desrves a lot of credit
in making it work. She even gets dp'd by these two
friggin' dolls. Pulling it off must've been a feat in
itself because it looks believable in a surreal way
and the scene deserves mucho applause for originality,
ingenuity, and the ability to stiffen your cooze
bazooka quick. Plus, the pair of wise-cracking dolls
that star in it are a nice respite from the human
dummies you always see fucking the babes in these
flicks.
Another amusing vignette from Perverted Stories 20
that rules is called "When Irish Eyes Are Shining" and
it features a chick getting fucked by a leprechaun.
The theme to this scene is sort of reminiscent of the
Leprechaun series starring Warwick Davis as it
features an angry leprechaun trying to get back his
stolen gold except this leprechaun doesn't kill, he
fucks. The hapless girl who stumbles onto the treasure
is played by sultry Aleksandra Nice and shrimpy stud
JJ Michaels portrays the leprechaun. Done up in green
garb and make-up, he espies Aleksandra stealing his
gold. He confronts her and demands a suck and a fuck
in return for stealing his treasure. They then get it
on and, man, I'm telling you this leprechaun can
hammer clam & anus darn hard.
Well, another vignette that pushes the boundries of
erotic entertainment is the aforementioned "Terror
From The Deep" featured in Perverted Stories 25. It
starts off with a gal admiring the natural wonder of
the moon and stars at night near a "tropical lagoon"
as the fog rolls in. One can only assume it was shot
at a somebody's house in Southern California that has
a pool equipped with a waterfall, but let's just
pretend it's really a tropical lagoon and give the
director the benefit of the doubt by suspending our
disbelief. It's just more fun that way, you fucking
cynics. Let go of any preconceived notions you have
about skin flicks and you'll be rewarded with a
genuinely interesting viewing experience. I'm glad we
could clear that up. People expecting another Vivid or
Wicked video will be in for quite a shock, but hey,
you'll probably like it, so do yourself a favor and
take a peep at Perverted Stories if you're looking for
something more out of porn, like entertainment.
Anyway, while she's enjoying the tranquil beauty of
the scenery, when out of nowhere a hideous
octopus-like sea monster appears and assails her with
flailing appendages and tentacles topped by dildos.
Somehow her dress is removed in the fray and the
tentacles impel her to suck the tips as others find
their way towards probing her pussy. Eventually all
orifices get invaded by the intrepid dildo tentacles
before she disappears into the black depths of the
pool, sound interesting?
Well, before I get on with the other Perverted tapes
that will blow your mind as well as help you blow your
load, it's time for a quick little background on the
sickos behind this series just in case you didn't
already know. Perverted Stories is the twisted
brainchild of JM productions leader Jeff/Mike Steward
along with smut director Jim Powers, who seems to be
on a never-ending jag to shoot fucked up sex flicks.
Together, they spawn these amusing vignettes with an
unrelenting parade of hot sluts and the guys who hump
'em dressed as fornicating anomalies, oddities,
freaks, clowns, scarecrows, gorillas, leprechauns, you
name it, they've all fucked under the evil eye of Jim
Power's camera for the sole purpose of generating
another unholy vignette to harden your tool and
sometimes tickle your funny bone, too.
Personally speaking, Perverted Stories 10 was the
first volume to really make me notice that something
special was going on here. It was just picture perfect
with a nice selection of pussy combined with some
wacked out concepts that came together beautifully to
weave a pornographic magic rarely seen in an industry
that puts little thought or care into the tapes
released by the thousands each year. Usually, when
directors try something different, they either fail
miserably and neglect the sex or distract the viewer
with some stupid attempt at being campy or unique.
Again, let's not forget the main attraction of porn:
pretty honeys getting porked for our viewing pleasure.
It's a minor miracle when a video can entertain and
amuse the audience at the same time and that's what
makes Perverted Stories special. Sure, lots of videos
attempt a convoluted story with generally lame
attempts at acting, but the difference is that
Perverted Stories succeeds by keeping it short and
making it work through imagination and knowing not to
take things so seriously that they don't realize their
limitations. This is porno, people, not mainstream
Hollywood.
Don't get me wrong, they take it seriously enough to
miraculously make the unthinkable feasable through
sure determination, originality, and guts.
Anyway, back to Perverted Stories 10 where the
concepts for the four vignetees are centered around
perverting four familiar fairy tale themes. The first
vignette begins with pretty Tricia Devereaux as Little
Red Riding Hood skipping to grandma's house with her
bouncy boobs boppin' out of her slutty red satin dress
like jumping gelatinous elf mounds. Suddenly, she
encounters Dave Hardman in costume as the Big Bad Wolf
so let's pretend that's what he is. He menacigly
connives her into mouthing his beef bayonet and she
acts perfectly like a naive little nymph. Soon enough
he's ramming her meat donut and inevitably reams her
ass as well. To end it, he squirts a pearly load on
her lips.
Next on the agenda is "Peter, Peter Pumpkin Fucker,"
a wunderbar scene starring Nikki Scott with Buck Adams
in the title role. Maybe it's just me, but anytime you
can get a plump blonde in a blue corset & black
stockings to squat on a dildo-stemmed pumpkin you
deserve an onanistic ovation from my pocket serpent.
So, Nikki Scott fucks a pumpkin and warms herself up
to be screwed by a "Woodsman" and anally plundered by
Peter Pumpkinfucker. She even sucks both pricks while
planted atop the pumpkin. Yeah, baby!
Now, if that scene isn't twisted enough for you it's
followed by the awesome blonde Lexi Leigh as "Little
Blow Peep" fucking Buck again, this time starring as
the lost sheep. Lexi was definitely one of the best
blowjob artists in the business back when this was
released. She really cooks when she fucks and this is
another fine example of her sizzling sexual skills
before she took her snizz and sadly left the biz. Wrapping
it up is another one of my all-time favorite porn
stars, the cock crazy Candy Apples in her skinhead
phase. I just love to watch her work and so should
you. Anyway, here she gets porked by portly Ron
Jeremy, who plays, you guessed it, the cow who jumped
over the moon. Talk about perfect casting, right?
Earlier on, I had mentioned this years's award
winning scene titled The Devil Her Do It and let me
tell you it is so over the top that it makes one
wonder about Mila's sanity. Sure, she's just playing a
part, but she not only plays the part of a possessed
girl, she lives it.
The scene starts out at the breakfast where Mila's
character is enjoying a peaceful breakfast with her
mom when all of a sudden she starts cursing like a
sailor and hops up on the table. She begins to frig
herself with a banana while spewing forth a litany of
obscenties. Sensing something diabolic has overcome
her daughter the mother calls in a couple of
excorcists played by the ever horny Dave Hardman and
porn lug Herschel Savage.
What ensues is an outrageous rite of excorcism where
the two wily priests fuck the devil out of Mila who
spews forth noxious liquids from her orifices in the
ensuing battle screw between good and evil. Seeing is
believing.
Overall, there are too many perverted vignettes
worth mentioning, but let's not forget "The Ugandan
Mishap" from Perverted Stories 16. Again, ol reliable
Dave Hardman is called in to help portray another off
the wall character. This time, it's a creature with a
shrunken head, hence, "The Ugandan Mishap". He fucks a
hot blonde for awhile before he is joined by Buck
Adams. The babe is slutty and the balling is hardcore
even with Hardman trying to stay in character and
screw while keeping the shrunken head mask from
falling off. Bravo, you'll probably chuckle while you
milk the muck from your cunt snake.
In conclusion, I'll wrap this up by saying they're
just too many crazy Perverted scenes to tell you
about. Some are just plain weird, others are
hilarious, but they all are designed to solidify your
penile steeple pronto. Some scenes might be tasteless
to some people yet others might find them merely done
in good fun, but all Perverted Stories vignettes are
designed by demented minds for pornoholics everywhere.
If you don't have a sense of adventure or sense of
humor you might wanna stay away from these stories
that corrupt the mind and cock, but whatever the case,
take a look just to see what all the fuss is about,
pervert.

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