With regard to the Hillary Scott's New Goth Look thread, I don't care about the details, but I was thinking it could be interesting to take a little survey of, say, the persons age, shape, nationality, hair color, style, and gender (esp. in CXXX's and Panzer's case). This isn't about preference, just experience.

The results could be telling and useful. Everyone's invited.


You first.

I'll put the obligatory "Yo' momma" here.

-Chuck, Vegetarian fanboy

^^^^^ damn, beat me to it.

In my living room. On the floor.

Woof ????

I had two really great ones after playing poker this past Xmas. There was this 20 year old hostess from my old work that texted me at like 3 in the morning. I called her and her friend answered. She handed her the cel and she was just like "we're tired and we're going home". I was like "OK' and then she texted me 2 mins later telling me to sneak into her pad. So I shoved my entire 300 into the pot with nothing but my six paired and a Queen kicker and got called by the guy with the ace flush made. The turn and river were running Queens, giving me the boat. He was so angry he got up and put his finger in my face and started yelling. I started doing the robot (im not kidding). I got a huge payday and fucked a hot girl half my age...

She was 22, half native american and half white. She had huuuge tits. They were bigger than D's. I forget the size but she had to get her bras at a special store. She was actually pretty well proportioned. Not fat... just... well, nice. Kind of like Gianna Micheals body type. I had been on a date with her before.

It was kind of funny. I spent the earlier part of the night watching horror movies with a friend. This friend had a boyfriend but she still allowed me all the fun privelages... except sex. Well, my friend left around... 2. I was really drunk and at this point very horny because smacking your cock against a girl's titties only does so much for a guy. So, I decided to start dialing numbers of girls I'd seen before.

I get to this girl and she is pretty drunk and its the end of the night for her. Her friends and her are at Stake N' Shake after a fun night out. I get ahold of her and she says her neighbor has been creeping her out. I tell her that she can stay over at my place. She accepts.

About half an hour later I had already forget I called her and passed out. Well, she walks into my bedroom. I did unluck the door for her. She crawls into bed with me and takes my pants off. I am sooo out of it at this point. I come around and realize what is going on and I just roll with it. I'm enjoying things so who cares.

Anyways, shes on top of me and I think I may have fell asleep because at one point I realize that huge tits are smacking me in the chin and I grab them to stop them. I have no idea how long that was going on.

So I come to and I'm really into it. I take over and go for broke. "Do you speak any other languages?", I ask. She says she speaks spanish so I tell her to talk dirty to me in spanish. I don't speak spanish but I don't care. I have no idea what she is saying to me but oh well, I think its hot.

We keep going for a while and she is screaming in spanish. I have no idea what she is saying but I still don't care. I like it. At one point she tells me "Not so hard"... to which I reply, "Ok, but you're the one who was going crazy earlier while you were on top". Trust me, those titties smacking me in the face kinda hurt. So I let up a bit and then I feel her hand starting to creep around my ass cheeks and towards the back end. I smack her hand away like a fly. Nooooo! She stops. So I continue until I'm ready to explode. I let her know and she rolls over because she wants to look me in the eyse when I cum. I think this is just retarded but oh well. Lets do it.

Anyways, afterwards she is all grabby and I'm just ready to go to bed. I'm wayyyy passed too drunk to still be awake. It is light outside at this point. So, we finally get to sleep. Completely naked, probably stinking... so next morning she gets up and thows on one of my shirts. She takes a shower. Then she comes back in the room. I'm kind of awake but still drunk. She throws on her clothes and disappears. That was that. I never saw her again.

What made it the best sex I've ever had? Well, she showed up out of nowhere, she was wild, she did whatever I asked and then she was nowhere to be seen when I finally woke up sober. It was wonderful.

^^^ By the way, I see all the jondra... but I am drunk and this is way better than editing.

In the cab of a Ford Ranger pickup in the middle of a pasture at about 2:00 am in late December. I spent the next day washing the footprints off of the inside of my windshield.

This post, like most of my other ones, is ultimately about failure. I tried unsuccesfully yesterday to set things up with a crazy girl I had stopped talking to a while back. I really wanted to try to bang her because I heard once that the best sex you can have is with a crazy woman. I forget which comedian came up with this theory. But after you "fix" them, you wind up with a very sane lesbian. This girl is crazy and also bisexual and superhot. But, she just wasn't having it. I kept texting her stuff like: "Girl, I know you believe in memory crystals and space aliens. But I'm willing to be open-minded." She's also one of those girls who's smoked so much pot that their voice doesn't sound right anymore. Like David Lee Roth. Oh well, I tried. :-(

^ I immediately got an image of this !

About 8 years ago when I went to Toronto I hooked up with this half african, half canadian hippy chick I met in a coffee shop. Her facial features and hair were more like a white person but skin wise she would have failed the paper bag test by a hair. Gave great head, and had a really tight pussy, hooked up with her over two nights and she swallowed every load and she let me ass fuck her right before I had to go home.

My best memory was when some pretty young thing told me that I made her cum better than her lover.

Several years ago a hot blond US Air flight attendant picked me up on a flight from Pittsburgh to St. Louis. When I boarded the plane she welcomed me and I could tell at that instant by the way she looked at me that I was going to get laid that night. She was insane but I can't think of any better sex than I had with her.

So now that we've resorted to sharing experiences, I'll share one from several years ago that involved an older woman. Much older.

I had just gotten off working the late shift at a restaurant and before heading home, had decided to have a few drinks at the bar. As I'm sitting there in my shirt with loosened tie, I noticed, many bar stools away, an older woman drinking alone. I don't remember her being strikingly attractive and she looked quite sullen.

I wish I could remember how she ended up sitting next to me, chatting it up, but over a few cocktails she began telling me about the loss of her son just a year prior. He had been about my age, maybe older. She seemed like a nice lady, but at this point all I wanted was to get the fuck out of there. I had just ended a long shift, was trying to blow off some steam and this bitch was bringing me down.

However, after an hour or so of chitchat and having had too many drinks to drive home, she told me she was going for a walk along the beach. Which, incidentally, was just outside the restaurant. She invited me to meet her out there when I was finished at the bar.

So after mulling it over with another drink, I took a walk to the beach. And after finding her there, we walked down toward the water, stopped and lay down in the sand. She almost immediately unzipped my pants and began blowing me, only stopping occasionally to slap my cock on her face. She'd clearly done this before.

While this is happening, a patrol car drives up onto the sand and shines a light on us. We somehow manage to get away with just a warning. And as we're walking back to our cars, she invites me over to her condo, which happens to be right there on the water. I give in.

Though as I locked my car in the garage beneath her place, I began to think this wasn't a great idea. She lived too close to my work, she was nearly the same age as my mother, etc, etc. What the fuck was I gonna do now? I was trapped.

As we walked to the elevator doors, I developed a plan. We boarded and got about three floors up when I flipped its emergency stop switch and hit the lights. I grabbed her by the back of the neck, slapped a big kiss on her, got undressed, and handled it right there on the floor of the elevator while a dim light shined through. Luckily, no one tried to board while this had gone down.

When we were through, we got dressed and took the elevator to the floor of her place, where we said goodbye, she exited the elevator, and we never saw each other again. I got the fuck out of there and hadn’t kept the job much longer to run into her.

Sharing these details with a bunch of degenerates on a porn forum is

You're all probably while writing it up.

Dear Penthouse Forum,

I am a Junior at a large mid-western college, with what I would call an average sex life. I had the most amazing experience at homecoming last week that I want to share with your other readers .......blah blah blah blah blah zipper blah blah blah hair pulling blah blah blah blah twins blah blah blah blah blah never saw that before blah blah blah blah blah blah came so hard that I blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah and I told her that I'd never forget her as she walked away to go to class.

Don't hate, you nigs.