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#2216 - 05/22/03 04:27 AM
The acid test for good porno...
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AC Cream Wannabe
Registered: 04/26/03
Posts: 441
Loc: WHYWHYWHYWHY?!!!!!!
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With this simple test, you can objectively evaluate the quality of your porno. It's simple. After you film a scene, track down the father of the whore getting degraded in said scene, tie him up, lock his eyelids open ala 'A Clockwork Orange', and force him to watch a video of his daughter in action, seeking stardom by dehumanizing herself sexually like any worthless whore does. Gauge his reactions. If he thrashes about screaming "Oh my god! My baby! WHY WHY WHY WHY?!!!!!!" or some such babbling, you know your porn is on the right track. If her old man begins to cry, even better. And if, after the scene is over, you untie him and he immediately runs to his gun case, puts his shotgun in his mouth, and blows his poor head off, well, you know you've got a masterpiece on your hands. DEGRADE THESE FUCKING BITCHES!!!! I NOT ONLY WANT THE WHORES THEMSELVES TO CRY, I WANT THEIR PARENTS TO CRY TOO!!! BECOMING A "STAR" HAS ITS PRICE, BABY!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Porno is terrrific. Thanks. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />
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#2218 - 05/22/03 06:15 AM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/14/03
Posts: 7408
Loc: JM Productions
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<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> simp,sounds like you've studied the box copy on my White Trash Whore videos.Good for you my friend,good for you.For your next lesson,I want you to study the back covers of all of the GutterMouth movies. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smokin.gif" alt="" />
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all women should be victims of something, because they lied. - big moose
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#2219 - 10/06/07 12:21 AM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Human Garbage
Registered: 05/08/07
Posts: 1681
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Bump. I was browsing older forums and came across this. It speaks for itself.
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There's not a woman alive who has not wanted to be treated like a whore. It's in their genes.
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#2220 - 10/06/07 01:26 AM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Rob Black's Crack Pipe
Registered: 10/02/07
Posts: 52
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Um this is not very nice and i think it plays too much on the degradation side of porn to me porn should be fun and everyone should be happy please dont turn my porn into nightmare on elm street also i think you should look out for what you say the owners of the board have been saying no to stupid stuff lately or at least that is my view we are all humans after all right ok
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#2221 - 10/06/07 01:31 AM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Human Garbage
Registered: 05/08/07
Posts: 1681
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Do a search and read some of simp/cumalloverher/windsock's threads and you will appreciate it more.
_________________________
There's not a woman alive who has not wanted to be treated like a whore. It's in their genes.
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#2222 - 10/06/07 02:25 AM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/17/06
Posts: 7863
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Um this is not very nice and i think it plays too much on the degradation side of porn to me porn should be fun and everyone should be happy please dont turn my porn into nightmare on elm street also i think you should look out for what you say the owners of the board have been saying no to stupid stuff lately or at least that is my view we are all humans after all right ok Go away fag.
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#2223 - 10/06/07 03:41 AM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Um this is not very nice and i think it plays too much on the degradation side of porn to me porn should be fun and everyone should be happy please dont turn my porn into nightmare on elm street also i think you should look out for what you say the owners of the board have been saying no to stupid stuff lately or at least that is my view we are all humans after all right ok Yeah, it's Bauer. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/brandon.gif" alt="" />
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#2224 - 10/06/07 07:20 AM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Demon Spawn
Registered: 08/25/06
Posts: 3016
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With this simple test, you can objectively evaluate the quality of your porno. It's simple. After you film a scene, track down the father of the whore getting degraded in said scene, tie him up, lock his eyelids open ala 'A Clockwork Orange', and force him to watch a video of his daughter in action, seeking stardom by dehumanizing herself sexually like any worthless whore does. Gauge his reactions. If he thrashes about screaming "Oh my god! My baby! WHY WHY WHY WHY?!!!!!!" or some such babbling, you know your porn is on the right track. If her old man begins to cry, even better. And if, after the scene is over, you untie him and he immediately runs to his gun case, puts his shotgun in his mouth, and blows his poor head off, well, you know you've got a masterpiece on your hands. DEGRADE THESE FUCKING BITCHES!!!! I NOT ONLY WANT THE WHORES THEMSELVES TO CRY, I WANT THEIR PARENTS TO CRY TOO!!! BECOMING A "STAR" HAS ITS PRICE, BABY!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Porno is terrrific. Thanks. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> Idiocy. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/drunky.gif" alt="" />
_________________________
"you aint felt fear till you felt a sista question you on things you dont wanna be questioned on."---GUAPO
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#2226 - 10/06/07 09:58 AM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Rob Black's Crack Pipe
Registered: 09/21/07
Posts: 69
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With this simple test, you can objectively evaluate the quality of your porno. It's simple. After you film a scene, track down the father of the whore getting degraded in said scene, tie him up, lock his eyelids open ala 'A Clockwork Orange', and force him to watch a video of his daughter in action, seeking stardom by dehumanizing herself sexually like any worthless whore does. Gauge his reactions. If he thrashes about screaming "Oh my god! My baby! WHY WHY WHY WHY?!!!!!!" or some such babbling, you know your porn is on the right track. If her old man begins to cry, even better. And if, after the scene is over, you untie him and he immediately runs to his gun case, puts his shotgun in his mouth, and blows his poor head off, well, you know you've got a masterpiece on your hands. DEGRADE THESE FUCKING BITCHES!!!! I NOT ONLY WANT THE WHORES THEMSELVES TO CRY, I WANT THEIR PARENTS TO CRY TOO!!! BECOMING A "STAR" HAS ITS PRICE, BABY!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Porno is terrrific. Thanks. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> lame
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#2227 - 10/08/07 11:20 AM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 4470
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Um this is not very nice and i think it plays too much on the degradation side of porn to me porn should be fun and everyone should be happy please dont turn my porn into nightmare on elm street also i think you should look out for what you say the owners of the board have been saying no to stupid stuff lately or at least that is my view we are all humans after all right ok Your barely week-old screen name says it all.
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Because you already yelled 'dropping prices!!!' after Red Light canned you. - Gia Jordan to Brandon Iron
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#2228 - 10/08/07 01:14 PM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 11/04/06
Posts: 4203
Loc: Bakersfield Plumbing Supplies ...
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FagswithDowns, have you even the first idea who runs this board and the porn they make? <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smashfreak.gif" alt="" />
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I also am subcribe to postal pornography - CAOH
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#2229 - 10/08/07 01:22 PM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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What do you expect. It's Dan Bauer aka Bauer024.
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#2230 - 10/08/07 01:30 PM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Rob Black's Crack Pipe
Registered: 10/02/07
Posts: 52
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i know more than you guys think but i also know enough to know that i dont know everything but i am learning and so should you ok humans are humans but this industry is bigger than just people ok its the whole organization of people i am talking about and we are not that different from say hollywood but we need more respect and to get that we need to behave better its not that hard ok so just chill and be cool ok
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#2231 - 10/08/07 01:31 PM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Kurt Lackwood's Fluffer
Registered: 01/09/06
Posts: 1248
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You guys are taking this alt way too seriously. Dan is a real person who actually has a truly lame personality, this is obviously a joke.
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#2232 - 10/08/07 10:58 PM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 4470
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What do you expect. It's Dan Bauer aka Bauer024. Jim, his last name isn't Bauer. It's just a play on his attraction to Jack Bauer from the Fox TV series, [i]24{/i]. Dan, you should know better than to play the ADT schtick here. You're a great guy dude, but you're walking into a cage of rabid pitbulls with the Captain Save-a-ho routine.
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Because you already yelled 'dropping prices!!!' after Red Light canned you. - Gia Jordan to Brandon Iron
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#2233 - 10/14/07 05:55 PM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/14/06
Posts: 14755
Loc: Busy downloading [LEGALLY!]
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Who exactly is Capt. Save-A-Ho's superior?
Is he a naval or military captain?
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Amo i Gemelli!! 
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#2234 - 10/14/07 05:59 PM
Re: The acid test for good porno...
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Well, if Captain America is any guide, it's an Army title. So I suppose the next in the chain-of-command would be Major Milfmeister, followed by Colonel Cuntzinspectin.
If we use Captain Caveman as the standard, you're on your own.
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