What's the deal with fisting?

Yeah, her vag is so big that you can put your hand up there. Wouldn't fucking her be like fucking air? I just don't get it. Does nothing for me.

Rosebuds

Anything trying to be erotic

CFNM

Foot Jobs

S&M stuff where the chick don't get fucked

Fake dick/load stuff

Bondage is the boringest fucking shit I ever saw. I never make it 5 minutes into all that focusing on the knots and ropes. Dumb.

Bondage stuff is for nerds mostly. I find girl girl boring. And if fucking loathe this cuckold shit, even more than gangbangs. It's another way for guys to be fags without coming out.

Not like fucking air. Vag gets swollen, what with the abuse and whatnot, and tightens right back up. So I hear.

all this ^.

i'll admit i was out of the lesbian game until i stumbled on to some 2 on 1 lez message stuff the other day. not earth shattering by any means but very well done in hd. and somewhat victimatic if that's a word?. if it's not brandon can use it as a title for his next series or tax return. my gift and all.

that being said i fluctuate between jimmy hooligan/tonights gf, and the shit i listed above depending on how my imagination is werking.

Those are two of my personal favorites. The CFNM stuff only works for me about 20% of the time, but there are times when it pushes all the right buttons.
And almost anything foot related is a win.

The only porn I "don't get", is the weirdass Japanese stuff with bugs, eels, and live octopi. Srsly tho wtf?

the japanese are definitely on their own trip. it's either highly degenerative or the gateway to a new more advanced learning civilization. maybe if we sent the mormons over there and released enough radiation we could fix everything...or nothing?. such is the speculative porn world.

I think the Japs are releasing more than enough radiation without our help. Fukushima.

^--fucky-shima porn, anyone?

Minus: armpit fucking. Damn Martin del Taco, why didn't he get sent back to Bulgaria or whatever?...

Jerky's list matches mine for porn I don't like or get wood from, but "porn I don't get" is more often the Japanese stuff. I can "get" scat or beastie or whatever UK/Euro kink because I can wrap my head around it and see the sexuality in the fetish. I can abhor a practice and still "get" it.

The last thing I saw that just made me call a buddy and ask WTF was called Futanari. That just confused the shit out of me.

I don't get foot fetish stuff at all. I loath femdom content.

Please enlighten us.

Anal prolapse shit...that's just the fucking worst shit I've ever seen...really-a gape is nice, but that's where it ends for me. Having a chick shit out her lower intestines just kindof creeps me out. Props to Jerk if he mentioned this already...Rosebud? I think that's the same thing?

I would jack off on Ava Devine's prolapsed hole in a heartbeat.

Where's everyone at on pussy/ nipple/ bumhole pumping? I'm for it.

Ava's a dirty mistress. Unfortunately she's been going tranny bagging lately. New horizons I guess.

Yea this whole 'rosebud' aka asshole on the outside is unacceptable, vile, and icky. I can't imagine it smells pleasant, it looks awful and painful, and when dukie can just slide right out of your balloon knot because the knot untied, that's just a big no. No no no

Your asspipe and intestine should be hidden always. Hell, duct tape that shit. I honestly think I'd vomit and leave

Lesbian porn has gotten a lot better these past ten years, I feel bad for people who had to jerk off to crap in the 70's and 80's.

But porn I don't get? Basically the "top rated" section on xhamster. Hold your nose and try and go through it. If you don't see at least one tranny vid and one black cock/cuckold vid, consider yourself very lucky.

@Palindrome: yeah Rosebud/Prolapse are the same.

@Barry: I don't get the pumping. Maybe nipples, but not the vag and bunghole.

Bunghole pumping? I'll admit to being naive to the dumper pumper flicks. What's it make it look like, a baboons asshole?

I'd treat a "rosebud" in my home the same way I would a fire or dog fight. I'd put the hose to it and then call for help.

footjob porn.

Foot job porn does nothing for me, but I'm not anti foot job in real life.

Actually tried doing the whole armpit fucking thing and while it's admittedly kinda weird, wasn't the worst place I've ever put my dick either. I'd imagine if she had armpit stubble it might have been a sandpaper-like disaster

I'm hoping those ears with holes bigger than their pussies don't take off with pws. I don't get it in porn nor in the rw.

skullfucking a girl with one eye.

Fucking the socket?

Yes. If it exists, it's an acquired taste/deviance.

I thought this thread was for porn you've seen and don't get. Not for sex that you don't understand. I've heard about Mexican immigrant poultry workers fucking chicken carcasses on the processing line, but I'm not going to list it as porn I don't get.

I wouldn't get that deviance either, if I saw it.

Goodbye, old ailment-Hello new addiction!

Ah, we've uncovered a potential skullfucker.

Never seen the Mexican angle. At the AVN Awards in 2006(?), they had little video interludes where Randy Spears was calling a D/s phone sex line, and each whore got him to do some thing dumber and dumber each time. One was to fuck a whole chicken (processed, of course). It was actually pretty funny.

I was there for the 2006 AVN's, but I got really drunk and left early. We showed up in a limo and they herded us onto the red carpet and we got to walk in with the porn stars. That was kinda fun. I think I also poured a drink on FreePix Tara. I seem to recall a video with a chicken that kept saying, "Bukkake!" And I think the host of the show was comedian Todd Barry.

My mistake, I guess Greg Fitzsimmons was the host.

Oh dam, nig. That was you?!? I remember walking behind Duke Floored and mentioning "Camera of Death," which he picked up on fast.

The skull/eye socket fucking bit first appeared in a letter to Penthouse Forum, circa 1991.

Preggo Porn.
That one definitely exists.

"Oh, she looks so radiant!"

Early pregnancy does some wonderful things to a woman's breasts. Pregnancy also does some wonderful things to a woman's sex drive and to having sex with them.

But after delivery, both are, sadly, wrecked.

It's the late pregnancy, ready-to-drop-but-taking-a-dick-up-the-ass ones that I don't get. Fodder for the curio cabinet.

I dig preggo porn. They gotta be young, lean and preggo though. 30something fatty w/ child would do nothin for me.



That reminds me of the Larissa Fox preggo scene. That whore was like the beta test version of Sasha Grey. She had me at her PissMops scene.

I second everything Bornyo says about preggo sex. That horny trimester is awesome, and it was downhill from there.

agreed.. the swollen tits and hormone increase before the sudden shock of "wtf?. really?." is a game changer.

just need to mention this though.. the postpartum "i'm fat/ needy" depression cycle isn't bad if you can werk it. sometimes that's where anal starts in your relationship and i don't mean child support payments. just kickin the truth..

The slapping a girl around act is kind of a turn off to me. James Dean is a notorious face slapper. I get the butt slap but wacking a chick in the face while banging her.....is a downer.

The NOS button on a broad is located in the cheek. It is best activated with an open hand slap, which squeezes the cheek between the palm and teeth. It releases a shot of adrenaline and pushes the whore harder towards the finish line.

Don't confuse this with the MUTE button that is located in the vicinity of the ear and the hinge of the jaw. It is deeper in and requires a firmer strike, preferably via backhand. You need to follow through with this one and try to lead with the bottom knuckle of the middle finger.

Next weeks lesson will be Soft Meat Shots That Won't Leave A Bruise.

Listen. If it doesn't consist completely of extreme oral and anal debauchery (no useless breeder sex!), plus every kind of filthy excretion act that a girl can engage in, what good is it?!

I like preggo porn as long as the chicks ain't dogs. I don't get the attraction for spit, vomit, snot and drool. Who does that shit?

You just named the only four languages Ryan Knox knows.

It's the 4 Food Groups for Failed Bukkake Boys.

Caption contest?

Faces of Derision


fucks sake... i know its a beat horse but that pic is right up there with some of the saddest sickest shit i've seen. i hope ryan is in a better place now..free of the demons and all.

I didn't want to do the self-referential link/display thing. It was just after breakfast time. Broccoli is best consumed much later in the day.