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#98508 - 05/01/05 08:27 AM Monkey's thoughts and questions
Smelly Monkey Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 01/25/04
Posts: 8662
Loc: In a k1ng like state of medioc...
I am going to break each topic into paragraphs so if one bores you , you can easily skip to another, cause thats the type of monkey i am, boring and aware of it.


I pinpointed why i hate fayner so much today, its so obvious that i hate myself for not picking up on it earlier. He reminds me of a drunk or drug addict bum, you know the one that asks you for spare change , laughs and tries to joke with you then you think " I bet this guy was one of those try to be the life of the party guys, show everyone how cool he is by doing as many drugs as he can and making sure everyone knows about it" Only to still have those deluded thoughts that people still (or ever) considered him cool. Difference is you can get away from those people easily while fayner has made it his mission to be this guy on what was the best porn gossip site on the net. So its like that bum living outside your house and having to see him every morning going to work and everynight coming home. I realized i don't give a flying fuck about fayner or his problems i just don't want to see or hear from him anymore and i wished that someone who was willing to update the lukeford site with porn would take over.

Question for girls who do anal or guys, i judge no one. I did a huge shit earlier today and must of clenched at the wrong time or moved or done something and my asshole hasn't been right since, this is rare but has happened maybe twice before in my life and tends to last maybe 2-3 days. Now this shit only lasted maybe 30-60 seconds tops, how do you deal with the asshole pain after getting a large object rammed back and forth in your ass for upto 5 minutes or longer. i mean it must be worse then the slight but annoying ass pain i feel right now. I can't understand how its a good feeling and that i have a new found respect for fags. I'm not trying to be funny or fill space, this is a semi serious question. I mean the real gape anal stuff, what are the lingering effects?




I could really go for an indepth review of the tt boy and lana sands gangbang scene by simp right now. Hands down the funniest porn scene ive ever seen and simp has a way with words to bring out the funny of the funny. I need suction, more suction (grabs nose and begins fucking head), yeah and theres nothing you can do about it, moves her head by hair like its a jug of water to a freaked out randy west, there you go brother, randy struggling to maintain wood. It was gang band wild style.



If you squint real hard george w bush could pass for max hardcore if they are both wearing a cowboy hat.

I wish kyoto would find someone to hate and go after again. i loved his garfield and tantas attacks. Cage needs a knife fight and i no longer have the limbs to do it myself









Edited by smelly monkey (05/01/05 08:29 AM)
_________________________
“Jesus said, hey baby, its all good" Wayne Lewis

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#98509 - 05/01/05 09:12 AM Re: Monkey's thoughts and questions
Smelly Monkey Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 01/25/04
Posts: 8662
Loc: In a k1ng like state of medioc...
can't be bother to edit but funny paris hilton interview about her house of wax shit.

Interviewer: Did you know the night vision scene was alluding to the sex tape?

Paris: I didn't see the movie until two days ago. I didn't even know they were doing that, but, whatever. I didn't mind.

I: Do you think people are mean to you?

P: Yeah. But, whatever. I don't mind.

I: Why is everyone so mean?

P: I don't know. I'm easy to do it to, I guess. But whatever. I'm a businesswoman. I'm not doing anything bad.

I: Last night at the "House of Wax" screening people applauded when you got killed.

P: I did, too.

I: You did? Why?

P: Because it's such a cool scene. They're applauding because they love it.

I: You don't think people resent you?

P: Well, maybe someone's trying to be cool, and like, "Ooh, look. I'm cool. I'm clapping." But, whatever.

I: Some people think of you as an heiress who had everything handed to her.

P: If people knew how hard I work, they wouldn't say that. I work my butt off.

I: What's your normal workday like?

P: I get up at, like, 6 a.m., and I'm on conference calls or on my way to a photo shoot or shooting a film or in the studio or at a meeting. It's always something. It's never free.

I: Your next career move is releasing an album, right? When do you write your songs?

P: I carry around a recorder. It's in the car. If I'm upset of happy or I'm thinking something, I'll say it into the recorder, and then I'll go work with my producers and my writers and come up with songs.

I: You say you want to retire from all this. Or at least cut back and have kids.

P: Yeah. In two years. Two or three.

I: And you say you don't go out anymore.

P: Not really. My boyfriend likes to stay at home. He hates going out.

I: So, you're dating a guy who's also named Paris. Paris Letsis.

P: Mm-hmm.

I: How do you tell each other apart?

P: He calls me "Gorgeous" or "Princess." I call him "Babaluna."

I: What are you going to name your first child?

P: Paris.


Every Father's worst nightmare



_________________________
“Jesus said, hey baby, its all good" Wayne Lewis

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#98510 - 05/01/05 10:51 AM Re: Monkey's thoughts and questions
Cleetus VanDamme Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/19/04
Posts: 7888
Loc: Carpathian Mountains
Freakin' Paris- seems to answer every question with- I don't care whatever and or that's hot. I waiting for the interview where the guy says can I stick it in your ass, and she says- I don't care whatever, followed by ohhh that's hot.
_________________________
"Some say I'm lazy and others say that is just me. Some say I'm crazy, I guess I'll always be"

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#98511 - 05/01/05 11:00 AM Re: Monkey's thoughts and questions
ChickenMaster Offline
Demon Spawn

Registered: 07/07/04
Posts: 3178
I think it would be cool if Paris and OJ had a kid.

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#98512 - 05/01/05 11:07 AM Re: Monkey's thoughts and questions
Cleetus VanDamme Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/19/04
Posts: 7888
Loc: Carpathian Mountains
Damn it, you had to go and remind me of that annoying ass- right after I got through griping about this annoying ass. Bastard.
_________________________
"Some say I'm lazy and others say that is just me. Some say I'm crazy, I guess I'll always be"

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#98513 - 05/01/05 12:51 PM Re: Monkey's thoughts and questions
jamesn Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/17/04
Posts: 6005
Loc: travieso capital management an...
that was a masterpiece.

i too, have taken several shits that didn't feel comfortable(opiates hate poop) and there's no way anal can be that much fun. my guess=best case scenario is it's succiently slow and careful it's not immediately painful, just an unnatural feeling. i'd imagine it's about as exciting as sticking qtips in your ears.vaginas are truly wonderful, why are they so uncool now?
_________________________
"She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone"

Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits

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#98514 - 05/01/05 02:42 PM Re: Monkey's thoughts and questions
Da Burglar Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
Quote:

Question for girls who do anal or guys, i judge no one. I did a huge shit earlier today and must of clenched at the wrong time or moved or done something and my asshole hasn't been right since, this is rare but has happened maybe twice before in my life and tends to last maybe 2-3 days. Now this shit only lasted maybe 30-60 seconds tops, how do you deal with the asshole pain after getting a large object rammed back and forth in your ass for upto 5 minutes or longer. i mean it must be worse then the slight but annoying ass pain i feel right now. I can't understand how its a good feeling and that i have a new found respect for fags. I'm not trying to be funny or fill space, this is a semi serious question. I mean the real gape anal stuff, what are the lingering effects?





Yeah the sexual pleasure derived from Anal Sex has always been something of a mystery to many....A nurse I once dated tried to explain to me something about rectal nerves having a "Neurological Proximal Redundancy" in relation to the Primary Genital nerves, thus providing a indirect pleasurable sexual sensation. She said it actually applies more to female anatomy than males, thus implying to me that (1) some chicks might enjoy it and (2) Guys fucking Guys in the Ass was even more Twisted/Fucked Up than previously imagined.

That being said, it would be nice to ask Genesis to Address this issue/question raised by Smelly....but she ain't been around since the Chat session, and I have been wondering if ex-roomie Missy ever looked in here for her missing Marijuana stash.....



Lets ask Kami. Kami, you're a Whore, you do Anal, you're hot, you have a great personality, you like Football, pills and meat products, what do you say?
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?

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#98515 - 05/01/05 03:07 PM Re: Monkey's thoughts and questions
Kami Andrews Offline
Whoremaster

Registered: 01/25/04
Posts: 2742
i like it i don't know why. the joy of my life is i dont think anything to much

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#98516 - 05/01/05 11:44 PM Re: Monkey's thoughts and questions
Soopergrizz Offline
Porn Fucking Master

Registered: 02/23/05
Posts: 3724
Loc: Paddling my canoe in the wild
Quote:

the joy of my life is i dont think anything to much




Who's better than you? No one!
_________________________
You're all still alive?

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#98517 - 05/02/05 12:37 AM Re: Monkey's thoughts and questions
Smelly Monkey Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 01/25/04
Posts: 8662
Loc: In a k1ng like state of medioc...
Quote:

that was a masterpiece.

i too, have taken several shits that didn't feel comfortable(opiates hate poop) and there's no way anal can be that much fun. my guess=best case scenario is it's succiently slow and careful it's not immediately painful, just an unnatural feeling. i'd imagine it's about as exciting as sticking qtips in your ears.vaginas are truly wonderful, why are they so uncool now?






Thanks

I agree on the vagina call. Vagina is underrated, theres too much on anal and gag fucking afleck duck noises, we need to go old school and re discover the vagina.

Quote:

That being said, it would be nice to ask Genesis to Address this issue/question raised by Smelly....but she ain't been around since the Chat session, and I have been wondering if ex-roomie Missy ever looked in here for her missing Marijuana stash.....





gensis is in the middle of her latin america dance tour, she should be back in a month or so, till then a answer by kami or meliss would work.




I just realized out of the pictures of the Hindenberg exploding, oj trying on the glove he used to kill his wife with and the one of the porn star who looks like brian urlacher with a $30 Harlem wig and the bellybutton ring drawing attention to the horrible stretch marks around her stomach that the most horrific image is that of the porn star.
_________________________
“Jesus said, hey baby, its all good" Wayne Lewis

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