Gutter Mouths 12
Starring Jade Marcela, Mikki Taylor, Tabitha Stevens, Tracy Love
JM In the behind the scenes footage, some guy says the best come-on I’ve ever heard:
“I’ve been eating garbage.”
How great is that? Anyway, Gutter Mouths is the legendary series featuring the girls with the dirtiest mouths in porn, spitting out all manner of outrageous raunchspeak while they fuck. This one was originally shot in ’99, which explains the inclusion of current porn stuporstar Tabitha Stevens (whose rise to fame is due mainly to fucking retarded guys and criminal flotsam for Howard Stern’s amusement), but it’s seeing it’s first DVD release now. It’s got 4 scenes of ultra-hardcore sex, and plenty of cussin’. But how much dirty talk do you actually get? For this one, I will compare the quartet of nubiles on deck to Craig Riggs, lead singer for Boston motor-stoner rawk kingpins Roadsaw, who’s got one of the worst gutter mouths I’ve ever heard. Here’s a typical between-song utterance from Craig:
“Hey you Christ-ass bitch motherfuckers! Why don’t you suck my cock, you asshole pussy cunts!”
If they can top that, then they truly are Gutter Mouths.
Scene 1: Jade Marcela. Ok, this one’s operating at a deficit because she’s Asian, and therefore prone to certain demure qualities. Also, she never actually says anything dirty without being prodded, i.e. the stunt dick says “Say I like to suck cock”, and she says “I…like…to…suck…cock.” On the strength of the scene alone- well, guys dig little Asian whores, right? She DP’s, she does anal, she gets glazed, she wears blue eye shadow; so, you know, all the bases are covered. That scar on her belly is little off-putting, but nobody’s perfect. On her performance as a “Gutter Mouth”, however, I’m gonna have to say she doesn’t quite cut it. Discounting all the lines she was fed, the dirtiest thing she says is “Ahhhhhoooohhhhhahhhhh”, which is pretty much the same thing any of us would say with an 8 inch dick in our ass. Jade Marcela is NOT a Gutter Mouth.
Scene 2: Sexy little blonde Tracy Love only has about two lines of scripted dialogue, and she botches them completely. The set-up is her husband’s college buddy is staying over- she catches him watching porn, and the next thing you know…
Tracy: I love sucking that cock.
Dude: You look like you like sucking that cock.
Tracy: I do love sucking that cock.
Hmm. Well, a little later, when her husband joins the fracas, and they get her all worked up in an assfucking, ATM frenzy, she says “Fuck that dirty asshole, ‘cuz I’m a filthy little whore, and I love it”, and then she starts yelling “ATM! ATM! ATM!” Not exactly ‘Christ ass bitch’, but definitely dirty. Also, she gets a weird look in her eyes near the end of the scene, a momentary flash of panic, which means either the drugs were wearing off, or she just came to the crashing realization that she’s appearing a low-budget fuck flick. Either one is kinda sexy.
Scene 3: Tabitha Stevens looks kinda like Jenny Mcarthy after a car accident, with cheekbones that are about half an inch under her eyebrows and the fakest pair of tits this side of a 50 year old tranny from Sheboygan, but one thing’s for sure- she is a Gutter Mouth. There’s no premise to her scene, she’s merely horny, and when her ‘husband’ comes through the door, she attacks him. Most of the time, she’s riding him cowgirl-style, staring straight into the camera, and saying stuff like “I see you out there...do you like watching my juicy cunt get fucked? Do you wish you could suck the juice out of my sweet cunt and fuck me with your big cock and fill my cunt with your cream? I bet you fucking do!” Stuff like that. Heavy, man. Even Riggs would blush in this chick’s company.
Scene 4: Mikki Taylor looks a little weathered, and her mouth isn’t really all that dirty, but I watched the climax of her scene 4 times, and I really do think she says, “Now that’s what I call a pungent cock.” If so, she obviously wins.
So, there ya go. Plenty of hot sex, a few graphic outbursts, but only one true gutter mouth. Tabitha’s so over the top, tho, that she easily makes up for the rest of the girls. I’d love to be at her table during Thanksgiving, man. Those family reunions must be a riot.
-Sleazegrinder