Give a pornstar a watch Thread

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#80004 - 01/18/05 07:23 AM Give a pornstar a watch Thread
Smelly Monkey Porn Jesus Registered: 01/25/04 Posts: 8662 Loc: In a k1ng like state of medioc...	If you are a porn fan then im sure there has come a point in your life where you have really wanted to give a personal favorite a watch to show how much you appreciate their work BUT have never had the opportunity to. Well now you do, like the salvation army this thread allows you to donate a watch to your porn star of choice and we will pass it along for you, if you don't have a watch but would still like to give one you are in luck, in the monkey gift shop we have some watches made from pasta shells and sliver glitter hand made by the monkey himself, Krystal Steal loves hers. They range from $34.99 to $74.99. (i really need a picture of a porn star looking at a watch or a clear view of a porn star with watch) _________________________ “Jesus said, hey baby, its all good" Wayne Lewis
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#80005 - 01/18/05 01:23 PM Re: Give a pornstar a watch Thread
Bornyo Porn Jesus Registered: 09/23/04 Posts: 10321	I dunno about a watch but I wouldn't mind spending a weekend installing a sundial in Melissa Laurens "back yard".
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#80006 - 01/18/05 02:36 PM Re: Give a pornstar a watch Thread
Cleetus VanDamme Porn Jesus Registered: 04/19/04 Posts: 7888 Loc: Carpathian Mountains	If it will help me get into her pants I'll would think about one to send your cousin _________________________ "Some say I'm lazy and others say that is just me. Some say I'm crazy, I guess I'll always be"
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#80007 - 01/18/05 04:38 PM Re: Give a pornstar a watch Thread
Da Burglar Porn Jesus Registered: 01/02/05 Posts: 5750 Loc: ATLANTIC CITY	Quote: If you are a porn fan then im sure there has come a point in your life where you have really wanted to give a personal favorite a watch to show how much you appreciate their work BUT have never had the opportunity to. Well now you do, like the salvation army this thread allows you to donate a watch to your porn star of choice and we will pass it along for you, if you don't have a watch but would still like to give one you are in luck, in the monkey gift shop we have some watches made from pasta shells and sliver glitter hand made by the monkey himself, Krystal Steal loves hers. They range from $34.99 to $74.99. (i really need a picture of a porn star looking at a watch or a clear view of a porn star with watch) Fuck the watch....I'd like to send Jewel and Jenna J. a grandfather clock, that instead of chiming, reverberates everyhour with a deafening simulation of a head-on collision between a Lexus and a Milk Truck...In Jenna's case to symbolize her current career.... and in Jewel's case to symbolize the PR horror-show/car wreck that has become the Jessica Dee fiasco at PXP. _________________________ Are you gonna eat that?
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#80008 - 01/18/05 05:41 PM Re: Give a pornstar a watch Thread
Smelly Monkey Porn Jesus Registered: 01/25/04 Posts: 8662 Loc: In a k1ng like state of medioc...	Quote: If it will help me get into her pants I'll would think about one to send your cousin KILL KILL KILL DIE DIE DIE CLEETUS, ME FUCKIE FUCKIE THE DEAD BODYIEEEEEEEEEEEEE. Hey baybee (borrowed from randi's weird sort of sister that she sleeps with sometimes) _________________________ “Jesus said, hey baby, its all good" Wayne Lewis
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#80009 - 01/18/05 06:00 PM Re: Give a pornstar a watch Thread
jamesn Porn Jesus Registered: 04/17/04 Posts: 6005 Loc: travieso capital management an...	you might as well make them tick loudly, as a constant reminder that they're ten years older than the new girls and entropy affects porn chicks in a different way than the rest of us. jewel denyle's so far gone it's impossible to imagine her ever having been attractive or anything other than the piano-legged porky-italian woman who files stuff in city hall that she is now. jenna never did shit for me, but she's hard to really hate for some reason. but when she's totally irrelevant after the surgery stops fooling anyone, you think jenna's gonna be happy to have bought those lambos? are they taking odds in london on the over/under on her mc-hammer-style financial flameout? tick-tock ladies, it's all downhill from here, and it's fast and ugly. here's your yugo, it must suck to know you'll have been nothing to anyone for a decade when you're 40. _________________________ "She has no waist, no arse...an interesting face...but all we are really worshipping is two bags of silicone" Martin Amis "honoring" katie price with a character bearing some of her traits
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#80010 - 01/18/05 07:33 PM Re: Give a pornstar a watch Thread
pariah AC Cream Wannabe Registered: 05/05/04 Posts: 446 Loc: Los Angeles	I'd like to order a few for Jenna's bouncers as a retirement gift. It maybe a year early but it is a nice thought. Can I get something engraved on the back of the watch? Touch her and die. Something sweet like that? _________________________ Pariah
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#80011 - 01/19/05 03:10 AM Re: Give a pornstar a watch Thread
Smelly Monkey Porn Jesus Registered: 01/25/04 Posts: 8662 Loc: In a k1ng like state of medioc...	Quote: are they taking odds in london on the over/under on her mc-hammer-style financial flameout? I KNOW. I am seriously considering doing a documentary on 40 year old porn stars who have been out o the industry for 5-10 years to see where they are and what they do, like tori wells, ginger lynn and shit. That stuff fascinates me, I'll calls it 'when the sex stops' or something equally as horrible Quote: I'd like to order a few for Jenna's bouncers as a retirement gift. It maybe a year early but it is a nice thought. Can I get something engraved on the back of the watch? Touch her and die. Something sweet like that? For those guys i think a better idea is to get a brass knuckle with touch her or die engraved on it backwards, heat it up on some hot coals and punch each one of them in the forehead to leave a permanent burn mark of that phrase on their heads for life, cause thats what they deserve. _________________________ “Jesus said, hey baby, its all good" Wayne Lewis
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#80012 - 01/19/05 03:59 PM Re: Give a pornstar a watch Thread
Da Burglar Porn Jesus Registered: 01/02/05 Posts: 5750 Loc: ATLANTIC CITY	Quote: If you are a porn fan then im sure there has come a point in your life where you have really wanted to give a personal favorite a watch to show how much you appreciate their work BUT have never had the opportunity to. Well now you do, like the salvation army this thread allows you to donate a watch to your porn star of choice and we will pass it along for you, if you don't have a watch but would still like to give one you are in luck, in the monkey gift shop we have some watches made from pasta shells and sliver glitter hand made by the monkey himself, Krystal Steal loves hers. They range from $34.99 to $74.99. (i really need a picture of a porn star looking at a watch or a clear view of a porn star with watch) For the really REALLY poor (or cheap) perverts/stalkers who cant spare 35 bucks from their monthly Porn/Pay-for-sex budgets (and/or Psychiatric & Legal Fees), we can offer a $1.99 Lipstick sent to your favorite pornstar, who can apply it on camera in a scene shot JUST FOR YOU!!! Your favorite whore will say, "This lipstick is from <insert name of desperate pervert/stalker> and I am going to suck this cock in front of me and leave skidmarks on it JUST FOR YOU BABY!!!" For an extra $1.71 (plus postage and handling) the lipstick can be sent back to you after use.... _________________________ Are you gonna eat that?
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#80013 - 01/20/05 05:59 AM Re: Give a pornstar a watch Thread
Smelly Monkey Porn Jesus Registered: 01/25/04 Posts: 8662 Loc: In a k1ng like state of medioc...	Nice sig. Slogan has some many meanings. I want to have sex with her hubby, film it and send it to her. _________________________ “Jesus said, hey baby, its all good" Wayne Lewis
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