A professor is giving the first year medical students their first lecture on autopsies, and decides to give them a few basics before starting.

"You must be capable of two things to do an autopsy. The first thing is that you must have no sense of fear."

At this point, the lecturer sticks his finger into the dead man's anus, pulls it out, and then licks it. He asks all the students to do the same thing with the corpses in front of them. After a couple of minutes' silence, they follow through with his disgusting command.

"The second thing is that you must have an acute sense of observation: How many of you noticed that I stuck my middle finger into the corpse's anus, but I licked my index finger?"

After the class was over, it took the janitor three hours to mop up the vomit.

Best joke ever!

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh MYyyyyyyyyyyyy GOOOOOOOOOOOD!

Best joke I've heard in weeks.

It's like a Butter Face Makeup meets Tossed Salad and Gag Factor all rolled into one...

Many years ago when my dad was a professor of Electrical Engineering he really used a trick like this to teach the freshman about safety. After the "shocking" surprise he told the students the topic for the demonstration was "it's not the wire I touch that kills you, it's the wire *you* touch!"

As I recall he used a 12 volt setup - which of course everyone knows isn't enough to worry about - and a whole lot of amperage to vaporize a probe tip and make a really big BANG.