What a nutty bitch, someone should kick her in the groin and use those new titties for punching bags. I can't believe how she constantly refers to her dead boyfriend as excess baggage.







From: lukeisback.com


hey there guys its eva! i'm so excited to hear that i have some fans out there...i'm glad to say i'm back!! and i'm starting to film some scenes asap! i was temporarily retired but i can't stay gone for too long. hope you guys like my new look!

oh! and by the way... i'm chinese and cuban.

i'm not going to do anal just yet...i'm going for longevity when it comes to me newly revived career. i'll start doing anal when i stop getting calls for b/g scenes. but you will see swallowing in some scenes. i haven't really shot any scenes yet. i just got a new agent yesturday. i have a new look and a great new attitude. Nothing and no one is going to get in my way!

sometimes i wear contacts sometimes i wear glasses. my hair is shorty and my body is new and improved.

i guess the glasses are a fan of many... i guess i'm going to have to wear a little more often with you guys. well.. about the pictures... i've just got back from retirement as of two days ago so i have yet to shoot any scenes. but i shot a promo for 7 lives exposed on playboy tv and next week i'm shooting with digital playground and possibly a new episode for my internet series on shanesworld.com i just met up with september and stacy valentine for representation. so as of yet no one has pictures of me now including myself. but when i get some i'll post some hot ones up...you guys won't complain...hehehe

i knew before getting my boob job some people would have mixed feelings. but i did it because all my life i thought was going to have large breasts because of my moms size. but as i grew older i wondered why my sister was so flat and why i wasn't getting any bigger. with much disappointment i was told at age 17 that my moms breasts weren't her own. i was devastated but then went on a mission to find a way of getting mine done. finally i did them and i'm happier than ever, my clothes fit a lot better and i feel sexier than ever. thats all that matters...my confidence those pictures are only a week old..if that and my boobs are 7 weeks old. so yes they still need time to settle...don't worry.

i shot my first scene back with metro yesturday, i believe its in their "new cummers" series. it was amazing and reminded me of everything i loved that i had left behind. i'm here to stay and no one can take that away from me. i got rid of some old baggage. thank god! i believe you may be seeing me signing for zero tolerance at the vegas show so be ready! hehehe

She wants to make her excess baggage proud!

She writes 11/20/04 on ADT about her ex-boyfriend who killed himself a couple of weeks ago:

thanks you guys it really does mean a lot! in the past two weeks i have gone through a journey that is hard to put to words... all i know is that i have seen the darkest and i am ready to see the light. i have had my nervous breakdown and reached the lowest i will ever allow myself to be. there is a reason why he took his life... he wanted me to do my best to suceed in porn even though he could not live here on earth to see it. i can't let myself go to waste. he didn't want to keep me from this anymore than he already had. i hate that he could not be okay with it but i except why he wasn't... he wanted me to be only his. i now know what i need to do...he did not die for nothing. i will do my best in every scene i shoot in hopes that i can fulfill my dreams... just like he wanted me to do. i shot my first b/g scene back with digital playground today and it was amazing. i felt like i was on a whole new level of performing, a new energy i had waiting inside...ready to erupt and boy did it! i feel revitalized and ready to make him proud.

Quote:

---

there is a reason why he took his life... he wanted me to do my best to suceed in porn even though he could not live here on earth to see it. i can't let myself go to waste. he didn't want to keep me from this anymore than he already had. i hate that he could not be okay with it but i except why he wasn't... he wanted me to be only his. i now know what i need to do...he did not die for nothing.

---

That is the shallowest of the shallow. What a weird way of rationalizing his death; that is pretty cold.

I will still be checking out her new work, though!

I think that's why that guy over there thought it was a goof. I mean, have you ever met someone who talks that way?

damn she's like 19 years old and she looks like a 40 years old bitch on that picture

I prefer the bookworm bitch look. Her new look is supposed to make her look grown up, I guess.

yeah she was so hot with her glasses and her real tits.

She writes 11/20/04 on ADT about her ex-boyfriend who killed himself a couple of weeks ago:

thanks you guys it really does mean a lot! in the past two weeks i have gone through a journey that is hard to put to words.****NOT AS HARD AS WHAT HER BOYFRIEND DID****
.. all i know is that i have seen the darkest and i am ready to see the light. i have had my nervous breakdown****THAT WAS A QUICK RECOVERY****
and reached the lowest i will ever allow myself to be.****EXCEPT WHEN I DO MY HUNDRED MAN GANG BANG VIDEO****
there is a reason why he took his life.****NO SHIT..FUCKING STRANGERS HAS A WAY OF FUCKING PEOPLE UP***
.. he wanted me to do my best to suceed in porn even though he could not live here on earth to see it.***HE WAS THE WIND BENEATH HER WINGS****
i can't let myself go to waste.****WHAT IS SHE ,ICE CREAM. i hate that he could not be okay with it****ATM'S GANG BANGS DOUBLE ANAL.
. but i except why he wasn't... he wanted me to be only his.****CANT HAVE THAT NOW CAN WE****
i now know what i need to do...he did not die for nothing.****I WILL NOW CARRY ON THE SEARCH FOR EL DIABLO****
i will do my best in every scene i shoot in hopes that i can fulfill my dreams... just like he wanted me to do.****OTHERS DREAM OF PEACE,WHILE SHE DREAMS OF 12'INCH COOK SLAMMIN HER ASS..DREAM ON SISTA,DREAM ON.****
i shot my first b/g scene back with digital playground today and it was amazing.****HER BOYFRIEND SHOT SOMETHING FOR THE FIRST TIME AS WELL RECENTLY***
i felt like i was on a whole new level of performing, a new energy i had waiting inside...ready to erupt and boy did it!****NO MORE EXCEES BAGGAGE WILL DO THAT**** i feel revitalized and ready to make him proud.****IM SURE HIS PROUD OF YOU THATS WHY HE DID HIMSELF IN..GET A FUCKING CLUE EVA....

This is so fucked... this whore is lower scum then most.

From: lukeisback.com

Eva calls me (caller ID gives her real name and phone number) at 10:48am Friday, November 26. "I got your email about how you wanted me confirm my identity. I thought I definitely needed to give you a call."

She laughs. "I'm reading what they write on Adult DVD Talk. Dude. I know it's out there but it's f---ed up. The s--- I've been going through the past three weeks has been blowing so hard. Then to hear that one moment they are all remorseful and the next moment, whoa, dadeeda."

Luke: "It is so hard to get your mind around such a tragic story."

Eva: "Oh yeah. My world has changed so much. Everything I had, I shared with him [her late 35yo boyfriend, Dan the Rigger aka Dan Beard, his real name]. Once he passed away [he killed himself through carbon monoxide poisoning Sunday, November 7, 2004], his parents moved in and took over everything. I don't even have a house anymore. I can't even get into the house I was staying at for the last year. My house is in chains right now. I'm staying with a friend, but I'm homeless. I don't have a bed to sleep in.

"I feel like I don't have any choice but to do what I want to do and what he wanted me to do. Doing porn has definitely been a necessity and has been a good way of helping me get my feet back on the ground. It's just a crazy time in my life."

She gives a disbelieving laugh.

Luke: "You broke up with him a month ago?"

Eva: "We were going through some hardcore problems. He was an alcoholic. He started drinking when he started watching my videos eight months ago. It got really really bad. A month ago, we were on-and-off. We broke up the day before he killed himself.

"The day I broke up with him was the day I came back from my first scene [in six months]. The next day he had killed himself. I found out the next day after that. The homocide detectives called me. I thought, oh dear, I hope he didn't kill somebody. That's when they told me, yeah, I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but he committed suicide.

"After that, I swear, I screamed bloody mary. I never thought he was capable of doing anything like that. He was so prideful and graceful. It was a shock to anybody who knew him."

Luke: "Did he threaten it?"

Eva: "No. Never. I would never have left his house if I knew that was a consideration. We had broken up like this before. We had had fights like this before. He had called his mom after I had left the house, the day before he died, and said, 'Yeah, it's seriously over. I don't know what to do. She's not coming back anymore.'

"His mom called his father and told him to fly in from Virginia. His father was on a plane and he didn't know his father was coming to see him. He'd done the whole carbon monoxide thing in his garage. He wrote his whole suicide letter. According to the coroner, he passed away between 10-11am Sunday [November 7].

"His dad was at his house by 3pm. His dad was waiting outside the house until the next morning when finally he realized that this is not right. He tried to break in. That's when his father saw him in the garage dead. He had been dead a long time.

"His mom was on the phone with his dad when his dad found him. It was horrible."

Luke: "What did he say in his suicide note?"

Eva: "He said how I was his last hope for love and he screwed it up. And how he was fighting his inner demons and he thought that I could get him out of it all but it was too much to ask of anyone. How he was sorry that we had wasted all of our precious moments on him. How now he will be at peace and he will be in every shadow and I will feel him in the wind. And that was the best thing for him.

"It was so beautifully written that you could tell he had spent so much time on it and it came from so deep within his heart.

"When I first read it, the day after he died, I just screamed so hard. My whole body refused everything. For exactly a week, I went on this journey. I totally isolated myself from everybody and just drove. In four days, I drove over 2,000 miles. The Saturday after I found out, I had this nervous breakdown. There's an 18-hour period where I had driven around my parents' city and I ended up at my parents' house and had a full-on conversation with my stepmom and went and passed out for six hours.

"I woke up scared out of my mind because I did not know how I got there. I spoke to my stepmom afterwards. She said I looked like I had just crawled out of my grave. That was the lowest point. I realized I could not live like this.

"That's when I called my agent [ExoticStarModels.com] and said that I needed to get the ball rolling. Me just sitting here and just thinking about it is going to get me institutionalized.

"They knew my situation. They had met him too. They were just as surprised. Right now I'm looking for an apartment. I will probably get an apartment with Keri Sable within the next week. It's just been nuts. It's just been one bad things after another in my life. In the last ten years, I could probably have written two different novels about my life."

She laughs. "To have this happens now? I thought he was my reward for having to deal with everything I dealt with, now that's taken away from me. Now I have to go soul searching and figure some s--- out."

Luke: "What did he do for a living?"

Eva: "He was a rigger. He was in charge of hanging stuff out at rock concerts and stuff. Lights. He works for Ozzfest and KISS. He worked on Spiderman."

Luke: "Was he a drug addict?"

Eva: "He did his share of drugs ten years ago. He was this huge drug addict, this huge drinker. Lethal. Then, something happened and he got sober. Then he was sober for ten years. Then four months into our relationship, he started drinking again. There are a couple of times I know he must've done coke. I'm not stupid. I've been on that side of the fence. I know what to look for.

"When he started drinking, it was such a split personality he went through. When he'd drink, he'd verbally abuse me about doing porn and having sex with other people. Well, I met him doing porn."

Luke: "How did you meet him?"

Eva: "He was starting up his own porn company. It was right before I knew where to go. I met him on sexyjobs.com. He said he would take pictures of me and send me home with a CD of pictures and I would do a blowjob scene with him and he'd pay me $200. I said yeah, let's do it.

"So I went to his house and I fell in love with him and I never quite left."

Luke: "Did he start a porn company?"

Eva: "He started it and he was filming his own content, but once he met me, he stopped everything. He had no desire to pursue that. He only wanted to be with me. The pictures he took of me were the ones that blew into my career. My career got boosted up 110% after that. I was working every other day.

"I went through a lot of s---. He was there every step of the way. He was supportive. Whenever I got injured, he nursed me back to health. Somehow, curiosity killed the cat, and he watched one of my videos. And this happened to be one of the most aggressive videos I did [jizzbomb.com]."

Jizzbomb boasts: "They come in looking sweet and innocent & go home looking like tired old whores."

Eva: "The scene was shot for New Sensations with Benjamin Bratt. [Dan] told me that the stuff that Benjamin Bratt was doing to me was the stuff that he would find him and beat up him in the back alley for. He didn't want to see his baby doing that. He was into the more glamorous Vivid-type stuff."

Luke: "What did you do for jizzbomb?"

Eva: "It was really aggressive to the point where he was choking me. I don't know if he spat on my face. It was on that level. He called me crying. After that, I knew this was going to be hard. I went in and out of the business after that. He told me, just do what you need to do. Porn is too important in our lives. Just do it.

"In May 2004, enough was enough. I needed to help him. He went on tour a couple of weeks later for four months later. He went to Australia and Japan. Even then, he was still drinking. There were times when he wouldn't even call me for days because he didn't want me to hear him in this way.

"Finally, he got kicked off the Ozzfest tour a week-and-a-half early just because he was self-destructive. He was getting pushed over the edge. It was getting to be dangerous. They couldn't rely on him. It was such a huge responsibility. So they sent him home.

"It just got worse. It wasn't going to be pretty so I did the whole if-you-can't-fight-'em-join-'em-thing. I started drinking with him. I just tried to be smarter about it. If he saw he was starting to get mean and aggressive towards me during a party, I would just go home and go to bed.

"He was supporting me for six months [that she didn't work in porn]."

Luke: "Did he ever hit you?"

Eva: "No, he never hit me. He would corner me and be an inch away from my nose and provoke me to hit him. I did most of the hitting. The day before he died, I head-butted him and broke his nose. I wish my last vision of him wasn't blood oozing out of his nose and over his mouth. It's the most terrifying picture I have of him. I just wish our last day could've been so different."

Eva cries. "It was a hard hard way to end everything. And it makes me want to be a better person now and control myself when it comes to anger because I have a Cuban temper. Unfortunately, I'm known in my family and amongst my friends as the person who gets in fights with guys. Whether it's at a party or its my dad or its a boyfriend. I won't fight girls. I've been arrested several times.

"Treating him the way I did, just knowing that he loved me so much still, sucks.

"I'm Cuban, Chinese, Irish and English. It's a weird combination. My mom was bad like that too. She had such an aggressive attitude. She would cuss at you in Spanish. I was so glad I didn't know what she was saying. I got that from her.

"Then I found a collection of my porn, of me, stashed in the house. He had every single one of my videos."

Luke: "He only asked you not to do it when he was drunk?"

Eva: "Yeah. When he was sober, he was hurt. You could see it. He was so hurt. He just wanted me to be only his and vice versa. He felt like he was sharing me with people who didn't even respect me at all. It was any guy's worst nightmare. Porno is not just a job. It's a lifestyle. I would come home and I would still be in my porn mode. He would be like, ok, you're home. You're not Eva anymore. You're [her real name].

"After I had a rough day, he would greet me at the door, dinner would be laid on the table already, and he'd massage my feet. He was the wife in the relationship. For a time, I saw our relationship as the all-American husband and wife family. We even tried having kids for a good nine months but he couldn't get me pregnant. That was also hard for him to handle."

Luke: "You write that he wanted you to succeed in porn?"

Eva: "When it came down to it, I told him, you can't support me anymore. I need to do this. I will even help you pay the mortgage payments. At first, I was doing just girl-girl stuff. He met with Exotic Star Models. When I first interviewed with them, he went with me. He made sure that I was in good hands. I was only going to do boy-girl stuff with him.

"After the day that we met with Exotic Star, I told him, for me to do my full potential and be successful in this industry, I'm going to have to do boy-girl scenes with other guys. He said, ok, if that's what you need to do. I want you to do well too. Let's do it.

"He spoke to September [at Exotic Star] several times about my career and how he just wants me to be in good hands. All he wanted was for me to be happy, even if it was at his own expense. He found a way to deal with it, whether it was having to drink, or working more. He dealt with it in some way."

Luke: "Was he drinking the day he died?"

Eva: "We have reason to believe it. I never got to see the body. I never got to be involved with his death. His parents wouldn't even let me go to his funeral."

Luke: "What has your relationship been like with his parents?"

Eva: "We had a great relationship. I spoke to his mom probably every day. We were a team. I was supposed to be in Virginia with them now having a full-on reunion thing. Dan told his mom several times to accept the age difference in me [19yo] for who I was or he would choose me than her. And he did.

"There was a time when his mom was conspiring to take him to rehab. She did it in the wrong way. He found out about it. He said, if you keep on calling me, I'm going to put a restraining order on you. He was threatened by her and made it obvious that he would choose me over her.

"When he died, she probably felt that I was the main reason. The letter was written mostly to me. She resented that. She's been really mean about the whole situation."

Luke: "How do his parents feel about you being a porn star?"

Eva: "They don't know. My parents only found out about a week ago. They were like, whatever. I don't even want to believe it.

"I'm sure that when they cleaned out his house, they must've seen pictures of me. He loved taking pictures of me. Clothed and fully naked. We were definitely sexual beings. We had home videos everywhere. We had porn everywhere. We had dildos and buttplugs in our kitchen. He was just like that. I know they know what we were up to. It was obvious that he shot it. You could find his videos lying around."

Luke: "Did he ever sell and distribute his videos?"

Eva: "He was trying to do something with Nectar. He had created a series called Knob Gobbler. He shot a lot of people. He never got to put it out there. He was more into the erotic-artsy stuff rather than the hardcore gonzo. He was great with editing. But a lot of people told him -- that's not the market now.

"He did everything POV. He was a really hung guy. He was the biggest white dude that I've ever been with. He was a good ten inches and as thick as my forearm. That's why it was hard for me to work and also be able to please him at home. I was personally burnt out after a couple of weeks because we would f--- like four times a day. Then I'd go to work and have to f--- for an hour.

"Then I got injured. I worked with Mr. Biggs. He tore me up [vaginally] and I bled all over the place and I was never the same after that for a good six months.

"We stopped the scene to clean up. I felt like finishing the scene because we were halfway through it. I'm not into walking out. I don't like leaving unfinished business. After that scene, my pussy got so swollen that I couldn't even stick my finger in my pussy. He nursed me back to health.

"I was able to only work. I couldn't make love to him if I knew I had to work the next day. There was no way."

Luke: "How did Mr. Big injure you?"

Eva: "He used this lube that was thick and after a couple of thrusts, my pussy wouldn't stretch anymore and it literally just tore.

"That was the one-and-only time I had ever double-booked myself. My pussy was so swollen, it was unbelievable. And the next day, I was obligated to work for Cherry Boxxx. And that f---ed me up even more. Working three scenes after having been so injured f----- me up. For a good six months, I wasn't normal. My pussy wasn't normal until a couple of months ago. It just sucks. I hate it. I am beyond sexual. I like to have sex anywhere and everywhere all the time. To mentally be so horny and then have to associate actual sex with pain was a bummer. I just blew a lot. I blew him all the time."

Luke: "Did you see a doctor about your injury?"

Eva: "Yeah. He said I just had to take care of myself.

"I ended up getting a bacterial infection. I was still working a lot. Fortunately it was this time last year. The industry was slowing down. Once it came to Christmas time, I had a good two weeks to calm down. But I never quite healed up until I took that six months off. He was on tour for four months. I didn't have sex for two months. I still had lots of phone sex and had my way with my dildos and stuff. It's different when it's a real dick."

Luke: "Did you guys go together to industry functions?"

Eva: "Yeah. We went to a couple of porn parties, such as the LA Direct Christmas party. We had Thanksgiving with Arianna Jollee. Tiva (formerly of LA Direct Models) was his roommate for a long time. He didn't want to be at the Vegas show with me because he knew I was going to be blunt about working with other people and he couldn't handle it. When we were there as an item going to little parties, it was different.

"For the most part, during the holidays, he was the only person I wanted to be with. I was never into having sex with any of the porn dudes off camera."

Luke: "Would you bring other girls home to share with him?"

Eva: "No. It was something we wanted to do but it never happened. We spoke about it a lot. We were even going to hire a girl. We were going to create a shoot so we could have fun. Normal girls are all talk. For a long time, I was only hanging out with normal people because I didn't want to be totally consumed with the whole porn world.