hello to you all i am puss.when my pet human leaves to do whatever it does to get my food each day i will visit.i will also stalk and kill any beast not as quick or as smart as i.i cannot reach the shift key.i like it here,i can hear the scurry of rodents

for some reason, i'm finding this hilarious. that's a great cat, btw.

oh you find me amusing do you?very well i will chase my tail and bat small objects around the slick floor for your entertainment.please fetch me a bowl of warm cream.also please look away as i disembowel an unfortunate tresspasser

at your service, some catnip as well?

the cream will be enough for now....the last time i did nip i woke up on the dirt floor of a mexican prison with blood on my paws