most of the time when domestic talent speaks, it's deleterious to the fantasy of the whole thing. they're usually so hyperbolically fucking fake or totally repulsively cheesy that it makes me think about how much i hate them rather than anything remotely erotic.
so i usually go for sheer attractiveness of performer since sound is out of the equation, and this usually translates into something european. there are obviously performers that speak english and aren't offensive, but movies with them comprising the majority of the cast are rare.

i think part of the wooden aspect that's so pervasive is i'm pretty sure woodman shoots his stuff at gunpoint after a long, blindfolded van ride.