I am honored, and flattered, and I humbly accept this award.

I'd like to thank my mom and dad, the Lord Jesus Christ, and Mr. John Ashcroft for all their support.

My new trailer is doing just fine, and Mr. Steele and I fit quite comfortably in it...except when he gets a hard on.

The diabetic seizures are getting less frequent, now that they have taken my sweets away.

I will work very, very hard to maintain my 'Shit List' status over the coming year.

In order to fulfill Mr. Jeff's request about killing myself, I will need more money so I can buy all of his movies.

This porn shit is expensive, folks.

I hope all of you enjoyed my review of the new porn classic, "Cum Staplers #7', located in the video review section.

Be careful though, satire can put an eye out, ya know.

Much love and kisses...

...your beloved...

michael