The problem with mixed signals is that they're mixed. Which makes the signal senders a) indecisive or 2) game players. Do you want or need that kind of drama? I understand the heart wanting what it wants. But at some point the brain needs to give everything the once over. It doesn't sound like she'd have been very good for you, and chances are you dodged a bullet.
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Having killed someone doesn't make you a killer- @KINGROCHE