I love the way "Monica" posts but refuses to answer questions that will make her confront reality.
She seems due for an involuntary 72 hour commitment. Maybe she can get the help she needs?
EDIT: I am not a professional and I don't live in the US. but if you know a person and think they may be a danger to themselves and/or others in my country we have a thing where the person who you are worried about can get help even though they are not volunteering for it. A room mate will call in for some help for another room mate who is acting suicidal or irrational. And so on. Mental illness can be very serious.