Nope. I'm all for pee fun but no poo-poo. I love talking about it and inspecting my own poo as it's always fascinating in the most immature way.
I'd piss on them for free. I just won't tell them about the asparagus I ate before hand.
If you haven't already, you should really check this site out, gen. A treasure trove of funny stories about people shitting thineselves, others, and public/private restrooms.
http://www.poopreport.com/