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What I meant was for a guy with a season or two under his belt, he had a pretty good second career. He was a great natural heel. Tall, fairly good looking, that mustache that could do nothing other than piss people off. Kind of a booming voice. Carried himself with a ton of confidence. Was totally without morals. And like a lot of heels at the time, a heck of a nice guy.
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I'd like to say that if Romo took liberties in the ring like he did on the field, someone would have crippled him, but Bob Holly still has use of his legs, so that theory is out the window.
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Speaking of Bob Holley, one of the oddball local sport channels was showing this promotion from Canada. Had Bob Holley, Zybysko, Billy Gunn (Kip whatshisname)...I can't remember who else. Plus a lot of younger guys. Really entertaining mid- budget show. Fuck if I can find it again, and completely forgot the name.
Well, that was a worthless post.
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Originally Posted By: Jerkules
Hey, they put the World belt on Mark Henry last night. He's finally getting payback for doing the Sexual Chocolate angle w/Mae Young a decade or so ago. Or Micheal Hayes called him a "boy" or a "nigger" one too many times and this is to avoid a lawsuit. Either way good for him.
The greatest moment in sports entertainment history.............
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Hey Fat Bloody, clear out a couple PMs and get in touch.
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I'd like to say they are doing a slow build to a tremendous angle, but we all know that aint gonna happen.
Tell you what a good angle would be, 1 segment a week of the Undertaker keeping order in the locker room. Work it that Taker is retired from the ring, but still around to maintain order. So and So doesn't want to defend the title against whoever, Taker has to rough him up. Maybe someone takes a DQ to retain the title, Taker meets him on the ramp, fists taped, ready to mudhole the guy. Pretty much a 5 minute hardcore match in the backstage every week, leading to a Taker Wrestlemania match, after he works his way from jobbers to a main event guy, HHH or Randy.
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Punk is still on the Bozo the Clown show...
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Originally Posted By: Jerkules
I'd like to say they are doing a slow build to a tremendous angle, but we all know that aint gonna happen.
Tell you what a good angle would be, 1 segment a week of the Undertaker keeping order in the locker room. Work it that Taker is retired from the ring, but still around to maintain order. So and So doesn't want to defend the title against whoever, Taker has to rough him up. Maybe someone takes a DQ to retain the title, Taker meets him on the ramp, fists taped, ready to mudhole the guy. Pretty much a 5 minute hardcore match in the backstage every week, leading to a Taker Wrestlemania match, after he works his way from jobbers to a main event guy, HHH or Randy.
I keep telling myself it'll be something cool and groundbreaking...but it won't. Unless a Kevin Nash led new nWo is groundbreaking.
I would love a Taker programme like that. It's 6 months from Wrestlemania, so he needs to pop up pretty soon. And how does any of this get over the Dewey Johnson/ Cena thing at WM? If nothing else, I do love watching Johnny Ace get dumped on his head.
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Only notable thing Johnny Ace ever did was crawlo out of the same hole as a Road Warrior. Guy was lower mid card, before he sucked his way to a job in Japan.
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Thinking of cracked-out and/or tweaking whores getting their throats and asses brutalized for the next hit makes me hard. --Rear Admiral
Hey, they put the World belt on Mark Henry last night. He's finally getting payback for doing the Sexual Chocolate angle w/Mae Young a decade or so ago. Or Micheal Hayes called him a "boy" or a "nigger" one too many times and this is to avoid a lawsuit. Either way good for him.
Wrestlecrap did a funny headlie about that one:
MARK HENRY, LONG-LOST SON REUNITE By Sean Carless & Catheline Perez
Silsbee, TX - Silsbee native and pro wrestler (technically) Mark Henry hadn't seen his son since WWE backstage agents took him away shortly after his birth in early 2000, never to be seen again. Henry, 39, was dumbfounded by the agents' own confusion at his insistence that they let him cut the umbilical cord and name the child after his late father, "Dad", unaware of the scripted nature of WWE programming. Though he would be constantly ridiculed by his peers for living up to his first name, Henry insists that no one had ever told him that the birth of his son, and pro wrestling in general, was fake.
"No one ever told me," Henry told reporters, tugging on his beard in confused distraction, as if still trying to put it all together. "I remember the other Rasslers always sayin' to me what they was gonna do in the middle of our matches. I just figured they was terrible at strategy."
In the face of accusations of his relationship to the rubber hand, and his affair with the hand's mother (elderly, semi-retired woman grappler Mae Young) being a sham written for the sole purpose of entertainment, Henry was again baffled. Upon further explanation of how his entire WWE career had been predetermined and scripted -- the cameras in strange places, the intercourse with the elderly, the transvestite fellatio --, he merely scratched his head.
"Predetermined? Cameras? Storylines?" a shocked Henry again asked, before smiling as if a revelation had suddenly come over him. "So this means Owen, Bulldog, Mr. Perfect, Hawk, Crash, Eddie, Test - they still all alive?!" he then bellowed joyously.
We didn't have the heart to tell him "no, the company really killed them," however.
Luckily for the former Sexual Chocolate, the news did get better.
Despite the unrelenting ridicule from his co-workers, Henry still spent the last ten years on a desperate search for his son/the elusive McRib sandwich that he had heard was so delicious, yet so unattainable. The search for the former finally paid off a month ago, when Henry and his hand child, now 10 years old, shared a tearful reunion outside of a WWE event, where the hand was eagerly seeking John Cena's autograph whilst wearing "The Champ's" paraphernalia on each oversized finger that made up his unusual body.
"I'm not gonna lie, when I saw him, I couldn't help but feel a little uneasy," a booming Henry insisted about the child's disturbing appearance, reminiscing, searching the sweat-stained singlet he was still strangely wearing for a candy bar seemingly tucked away within an unseen crevice. "I mean, man, that Cena merch is terrible."
After his auspicious birth and brief storage in a secret WWE vault-- alongside the bound body of former wrestling standout Randy "Macho Man" Savage and the unedited version of the 50 Greatest Superstars of All Time DVD--, the young hand, unbeknownst to his father, was then reared in an orphanage for disembodied and detached WWE parts, eventually growing up alongside deposed others such as Kerry Von Erich's foot, Zach Gowen's cancer leg, Chyna's penis, and Ted DiBiase, Jr.'s personality.
When pressed for comment about this unusual upbringing, the young hand itself was strangely silent. Its lack of mouth may have played a part. His father, however, was a little more forthcoming. Kind of.
"I wasn't ready to be a father/professional wrestler," Henry soon explained, thinking back to the night of his son's birth with a heart heavy, and likely covered in 3 inches of cholesterol. "All I remembered was that Pat Patterson reachin' both hands into a dark hole, winking at me, and sayin' 'just another day at the office! I tuned out everything else after that."
It was a mere days later that he realized that he had made a terrible mistake in letting his only son go/wearing red instead of the much more slimming black.
However, after a brief rocky road-- and countless other flavors of ice cream--, the happy father and son, --since rechristened "The World's Strongest Hand"--, are now living together and trying their best to make their new lives work. The child has even already taken on many of his father's traits. Within days of their reunion, it had already instinctually bent most of the frying pan's in the kitchen and torn all the phone books in the house in two - an act of inherited strength that initially angered his usually jovial father as there was now no way to prepare/order dinner. And of course the standard 2nd and 3rd dinners. The child also broke every finger on his body and injured three neighborhood children in the process.
Despite insisting that these hiccups are just transitory and they'll eventually find their groove, like any father, Henry still worries about his son's future.
"There's not a lot of suitable hand-jobs out there," he revealed ignorantly, but innocently. "But we's not gonna accept just any hand-outs," he then continued, again naively deadpan, holding his last frying pan. Then bending it. Just because.
Luckily, the good people behind the Hamburger Helper brand have since come to the Henrys' aid regardless, offering a potential spokesperson deal to the unique child, if and when he's ready.
"I'm just glad he'll be helping people," the proud papa revealed soon after hearing the news, before being informed of what it really meant and where he could get some. "Maybe one day he can take up Rasslin, too. Without feet, he'd be a shoe-in to win the Royal Rumble. Or a glove-in."
When met with silence, Henry let out a nervous laugh. "This why we don't get to write our own promos," he then revealed with egg on his face. Literal egg; a leftover remnant from a seemingly bountiful breakfast.
"But I'm not too worried," he then continued optimistically, soon cradling the stoic human-limb that is his son in his massive arms. "Even though I told them the boy can't talk and seems to have no personality, Vince just shrugged his shoulders, handed him a ticket to FCW, and said, 'He'll fit right in.'"
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Holy Shit! Tyson Tomko has a hell of a tolerance to go along with a set of balls. He threatened a CVS pharmacist, took several bottles of Oxycodone, fled to a Chilis, and holed up in the bathroom, crushing, cooking, and shooting 178 tablets in 30-40 minutes, before cops arrived. Heroin is easier on the liver dude. Ask Artie.
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I always liked Tyson Tomko. Great look, lots of charisma, seemed to have some natural talent. That's some serious jonesing if you think going into Chili's for any reason is a good idea.
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Promo for an ESPN thing on Scott Hall. Really really pathetic. I stumble on the old AWA on ESPN shows occasionally and he had the business by the balls. Not so much now.
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Kevin Nash says Hall isn't suffering from addiction, but PTSD. I figure that means he was abused as a child, sexually or physically.
You are correct though. If things were a little different, and say Nash and Micheals left for WCW, Hall woulda been a multiple time world champ. He was the only one Austin wanted to work with when the NWO showed up in WWE, because when he's sober, he's the only good worker of the bunch.
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Originally Posted By: Jerkules
Kevin Nash says Hall isn't suffering from addiction, but PTSD. I figure that means he was abused as a child, sexually or physically.
You are correct though. If things were a little different, and say Nash and Micheals left for WCW, Hall woulda been a multiple time world champ. He was the only one Austin wanted to work with when the NWO showed up in WWE, because when he's sober, he's the only good worker of the bunch.
hahahaha, ptsd? from what, living a non stop party for the last 15 years while getting paid a small fortune? Maybe it was the stress of his little buddy x-pac almost auto corpsing. Seriously, fuck Kevin Hash. ........if anyone should be suffering from fucking SHELL SHOCK....would be the other %99 percent of wrestlers who put their bodies through just as much hell and end up dirt broke working at gas stations the wrest of their lives after their careers dry up.
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Originally Posted By: Barry the Pirate
Promo for an ESPN thing on Scott Hall. Really really pathetic. I stumble on the old AWA on ESPN shows occasionally and he had the business by the balls. Not so much now.
holy shit look at this old ass Scott Hall footage, looks like John Holmes a foot taller with 80 extra pounds of muscle
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Hall blamed his being held back in WCW because AWA billed him as Magnum Scott Hall and Magnum TA and Dusty didn't like the gimmick infringement.
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I remember a little clip AWA ran of Hall wrestling a highly tranquilized gator. He was wearing acid washed jeans. Hall, not the gator. I mean, we all had a pair, but it was still a giggle.
I totally agree with the "Fuck Kevin Nash" sentiment. Atrocious worker, injury prone, self centred like a 3 year old. All around piece of shit.
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E-60 on ESPN just did a special on Scott Hall. It was supposed to be on Wednesday night, but I couldn't find it. Still gotta' check my DVR. It was being discussed on another forum and apparently Scott killed a guy? Don't know the circumstances, but apparently it's one of the things that's driven him into the downward spiral he's in. I really wanted to go in laughing at this shit, but fuck, man, it looks heart-breaking. I haven't seen the video below, and have no sound on the work computer, so let me know if the "killed a guy" thing is explained there.
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Argument over a girl at the strip club he was bartending at. Dude smashes all the windows in Scott's car. Scott hits the guy, knocks him down. Guy goes for a gun, he and Scott wrestle around for it, Scott gets it, shoots the guy in the head. Charged w/ 2nd degree murder, charges dropped due to insufficient evidence.
PTSD out the window. Just an excuse for being a fuck up.
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Notes:
Good Quote: "All them years of partying, now I take all these pills and don't get a buzz." In reference to all the heart medication, etc he has to take.
"From the out house to the penthouse to the half way house."
The reconciliation with his son lasted about a month before the kid couldn't take it any more.
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It was pretty pathetic. The little indie show appearance was just sad. And the callousness of the promoter was unreal.
I think his ex nailed it. The character meant more to him than anything. In the interview with ESPN he had that fucking toothpick in his mouth the whole time.
If he makes another 18 months, I'll be shocked.
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Steph who??? That Mrs. HHH's titty?
Fucking snob. Wrasslin to low brow for you??? Good then stay outta here and stick to Charin's gag fuck screen caps.
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Steph was hotter pre-implants, but she seems to have grown into them. Things musta been ginormous when she was pregnant.
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WWE is planning to launch their own cable network around the time of the 2012 Wrestlemania. One of the planned shows is going to be called "WWE House of Fame." It will be a Real World/Surreal Life clone with a bunch of "Legends" living together, in front of a camera. If they have the Iron Sheik and one or 2 other lunatics, how can it not be good? Tony Atlas and his horrible command of the english language, would equal many viral sound bites.
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Sheiky is hard for me to understand. I keep hearing about all these incidents involving him dumping on Hogan or whoever, but when I track it down on YouTube, it never makes sense.
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From Lordsofpain.net:
Former NWA World Heavyweight Champion Barry Windham is currently hospitalized in an intensive care unit in Florida, reports PWInsider.com.
Windham, 50, reportedly suffered either a stroke or heart attack within the last 24 hours. There is a claim that he was discovered fallen and awake but suffering.
WWE Hall of Famer Blackjack Mulligan, his father, posted a notice on Facebook asking fans to keep Windham in their prayers. ------------------------------------------------------------------- If it was a stroke, I'll attribute it to heavy cocaine use in his 20's. That is usually the cause of early strokes. If it was a heart attack, I attribute it to being a 350 pound redneck. He never looked like he juiced. Never even really looked like he worked out in a gym, just the ring.
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I'd like to think that pretty much every wrassler juiced in that time period. There's a documentary on Netflix streaming called "Card Subject To Change" which is all about wrasslin' in the indies. This one guy was breaking it down how he uses a steroid called "winstrol" that is made for cutting cycles and doesn't result in any significant bulk gain. Basically it speeds up the fat-losing, muscle defining process. Sort of a Bruce Lee steroid, I guess.
Regardless, it's a pretty cool doc if you get a chance to see it. Kevin Sullivan is profiled, and I can't fucking believe how good the guy looks compared to say, Ric Flair, or someone else that started in 71' 72'. He's in amazing shape, and doesn't even really look that old.
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Originally Posted By: Jerkules
From Lordsofpain.net:
Former NWA World Heavyweight Champion Barry Windham is currently hospitalized in an intensive care unit in Florida, reports PWInsider.com.
Windham, 50, reportedly suffered either a stroke or heart attack within the last 24 hours. There is a claim that he was discovered fallen and awake but suffering.
WWE Hall of Famer Blackjack Mulligan, his father, posted a notice on Facebook asking fans to keep Windham in their prayers. ------------------------------------------------------------------- If it was a stroke, I'll attribute it to heavy cocaine use in his 20's. That is usually the cause of early strokes. If it was a heart attack, I attribute it to being a 350 pound redneck. He never looked like he juiced. Never even really looked like he worked out in a gym, just the ring.
His first heel turn on GCW broke my heart.
You never know. My doctor told me one time if you can get from 45 to about 53 without a coronary or stroking out, you were probably good til your 70's at least. He basically said being 45 is in and of itself a risk factor. One minute you're in the sack with a hot girl, or guy, and the next, you're a lampshade.
Whose crank did he have to suck to be World Champion?
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It was after WCW made their own belt, but before they pulled out of the NWA. Barry won it from Muta, lost it to Flair, WCW pulled out a couple months later. Barry was part of the office, so he probably didn't have to blow anyone. Coulda been something as simple as Flair didn't like working with Muta, so they used Barry as a transition.
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Muta was God as far as I was concerned. I enjoyed watching Kabuki more, because he had a really odd style. Very slow, kind of disjointed pace. A little like watching the Original Sheik. But Muta was such a fantastic technician.
Kendall was terrible. He had a bad build for a "tough guy". Greg Gagne was the same way. He looked like my insurance guy. How do you take that seriously?
I'm really starting to enjoy TNA again. Taking the focus off Hogan. Putting thetrap on Storm was a real shock. I was sort of figuring he'd heel turn on Roode, and was pleasantly surprised he didn't. I can see some fun drama if the rest of Fortune gets jealous or Storm gets a big head.
The Bischoff kid is interesting. It's kind of a unique storyline. Usually the dad is the redeemed heel trying to steer the heel kid away from the mistakes the dad made. Bill Dundee/ Jaimee Dundee went that way. But having the dad remain evil, the kid being a babyface, and dad trying to force him to be evil is a nice twist. Let's try to not ruin it, shall we? Putting the kid in a program with Flair should help to bring him along nicely.
On the other hand, I don't give 2 shits about Jeff Hardy and his endless apology tour. He's not a good heel. His best role is that of a weirdo good guy.
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Barry must not read the dirt sheets. You will like next weeks Impact.
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See, to me, TNA is my source for unintentional comedy gold with a good match every now and then. It's more than I can say about the E', as I gave up watching that shit around the time the PG era really started reeling it's ugly head with their goddamned guest stars and children's variety show antics.
While I do get some great lulz from TNA, I also get really, really frustrated with their schizophrenic booking and longtime refusal to push those that actually deserve a push. This Crimzon guy they're pushing looks like an inbred with a slighty burned-off hairdo, and his ring skillz are lackluster at best. The other dipshit that they're pushing to the moon (Gunner) is about as exciting as a warm bowl of oatmeal. Meanwhile, the pope, Styles, EY, etc. are stuck with go-nowhere angles, and little TV time. Let's not forget the hundreds and hundreds of angles that they built heavily or slightly that ended up going absolutely fucking nowhere.
I mean, they set up that entire Bound For Glory series to prop up Roode, then take the title away at the last second because Hogan didn't think he was ready. Now, even if it is, as Hogan would say, "a worked shoot, brother", it still seems like an unecessary way to build a Roode/Storm feud. Not to mention how that particular dick-move really proved how much they're taking their fans for granted.
TNA has all the power in the world to be THE product that WWE refuses to be, which is a fed with a lockeroom full of talent and the go-ahead to go out there and actually give it their all for the sake of a good match, but they let clueless idiots like Dixie Carter run the place and enable the russos and hogans to book it into the goddamn ground. I still watch Impact every week, but the frustrations are starting to outweigh the lulz and the occasional good match. I'll stop now.
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Well, Dixie owns it, so that can't be helped. And I don't get Russo. He wrote legendary stuff in WWE. I don't know if he buys his own genius gimmick, or if he's just burned out or what? Maybe too many cooks in the kitchen. And Hogan...he's a known quantity. He's about pushing Hogan in the best of circumstances. But with his money problems, he's desperate, so that just means he's going to be even more about himself.
I really like Gunnar and Crimson. They both have a pretty good look and are not bad hands. I'd put them together as a tag team and give them a manager to talk for them. Jim Mitchell, preferably, but I'm a big Jim Mitchell mark. They just need some seasoning.
It's too bad, because Jarrett and his dad were booking geniuses in the land of long ago. They have a locker room full of talented, hungry workers. They're building a really talented X Division. And their women's division has the best girl workers in the business.
I keep watching because I keep hoping, I guess.
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I don't buy Russo being so good back in the day. Everything and anything goes through Vince. Different guys might have his ear at different times, but everything is Vince's call. When Russo had all the power, WCW was shit. He just sucked the right assholes to keep getting work.
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Thinking of cracked-out and/or tweaking whores getting their throats and asses brutalized for the next hit makes me hard. --Rear Admiral
Barry is on to something with Gunner and Crimzon as a tagteam. These two definitely have potential, but their gimmick-less stints give the fans nothing to really enjoy. Seriously, these guys gimmicks are "I'm an intense dude and don't back down from NO ONE". That's it. Nothing interesting, quirky, or entertaining to talk about or appreciate. Gimmicks and good matches are what made wrestling for me growing up.
Take Jeff Jarrett for example. I absolutely hated him in the "king of the mountain" gimmick where he was basically a shit-talking heel that couldn't lose. On the other hand, when given the gimmick of a delusional heel, like MMA Jarrett, he really bought some entertainment. Remember that video where he was beating up the kids? It was one of the few times I aknowledged TNA as doing something right. MMA Jarrett was one of the few things that even the staunchest TNA hater thought was a good, funny gimmick.
It's not completely hopeless for me, yet. Look at Bully Ray. TNA did a bang-up job of actually building this guy into a believable heel. There's moments, when he's doing his thing, that I actually have to remind myself that this is Bubba Ray playing the part of an asshole. That's a pretty impressive feat when you take into account just how much of a bitter, jaded fan that I am. The guy generates genuine heat, and not what the fans collectively call "X-Pac heat" which is basically the term for when a guy gets booed not because he's a good heel, but because the fans hate him period and feel that he has absolutely no business inside a ring. I'd be surprised if he doesn't get the strap in the near future, after it goes to Roode, then Hardy. But then again, this is TNA and I can almost guarantee you they will screw up the Bully Ray character too, as they never seem to fucking know a good thing when they see it.
As for the women, Barry, if you're just comparing them to WWE, then I would have to agree with you, but if you factor in some of the indies like the all-women's fed SHIMMER, you'd find yourself second-guessing. I'm as much a fan of Velvet Sky shaking her ass and pointing to her starfish as the next one, but she is absolute shit on the mike and in the ring. If you wanna see some women really go at it, youtube Sara Del Ray, Cheerleader Melissa, MisChif, or Lufisto, and that's not even including the japanese bitches, who go at it just as hard, if not harder than the mens. Check out the vid below if you haven't already seen it. I went ahead and dug up the version with the ICP on commentary, as their wrestling commentary is second to fucking none. It's not the most well-executed women's match, but it does go a long way in establishing the benchmark for the work-rate of female wrestlers in Japan. But yeah, I'll take the knockouts over the Divas in the ring, on the mike, and on my dick, any day.
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Chris Masters sent out a tweet asking followers to guess which Smackdown Diva has an "ORAL" agreement with Micheal Hayes to keep her job and push. My question is which one doesn't. Who you fuck in WWE/wrestling has always helped determine your push and job status. Or who you pimped your woman to/who she fucked behind your back. From the Brooklyn Brawler, to Sunny/Candido to Melina/Morrison to HHH, they all do it.
P.S. Since the Freebird is known to be an old timey southern redneck racist, I'll guess that black chick Alicia Fox.
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Thinking of cracked-out and/or tweaking whores getting their throats and asses brutalized for the next hit makes me hard. --Rear Admiral
Sort of unrelated, but I remember reading about how Randy Orton was rejected by a Diva, and proceeded to take a shit in her gym bag. I'll be back with more info.
No definite info here, but sort of a lulzy thread. According to these guys, it was a mix of lotion and sun tan oil. There's also a claim on there that X-pac once took a shit in Sable's gym bag. What's with all the shitting in wimminz gym bagz?
Edited by fartz (10/31/1109:11 AM) Edit Reason: for' da poopz
Registered: 12/09/08
Posts: 8433
Loc: Great Pacific Northwest
I hate the "Bully Ray" gimmick. I think the costume, mostly, followed quickly by the "Bully" part. That said, Bubba is a legit tough guy, and a heat machine when he's in the groove. And he's in the groove right now. Enough that I can easily overlook the costume.
I love delusional crazy. A good heel should believe that everything they do is justified. It's a method acting sort of thing, but it makes the gimmick believable.
I've never seen SHIMMER. I'm going to go find more on them. I meant TNA had the best Women's group in the states. Japan never counts. They're so far beyond anything that gets done here they're not even in the same league.
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Having killed someone doesn't make you a killer- @KINGROCHE
Registered: 07/15/09
Posts: 12905
Loc: 3 feet high and rising
I heard that Orton rumor a while ago.
In shoots, Xpac confirms shitting in Sable's bag. He doesn't admit to doing it, but he says someone definitely did.
Also in some shoots, it is said Bubba and Taz are fugazi tough guys. All talk.
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Thinking of cracked-out and/or tweaking whores getting their throats and asses brutalized for the next hit makes me hard. --Rear Admiral
Registered: 12/09/08
Posts: 8433
Loc: Great Pacific Northwest
Shitting in luggage seems to be pretty common. I wonder if other jocks do that too.
For some reason, I keep remembering it being Owen Hart that shat in Sable's bag. Wow, talk about your worthless cunts. She really turned me off. As I understood it, she's the one who put the kibash on the Mero/ Kim Page angle in WCW because it would confuse her and Mero's kid. Of course, her whorish behaviour at the height of her stardom would cause no confusion whatsoever.
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Having killed someone doesn't make you a killer- @KINGROCHE