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#526931 - 08/12/11 07:51 PM Slap Happy 2
charin Offline
Gag Factor Guru
Porn Jesus

Registered: 07/15/05
Posts: 5290
Loc: Dayton
Well, I saw mention of this series, and had this on hand, so what the hell. This is a little different from my usual blow by blow review, because the scenes are basically the same. Exceptions will be noted. Most or all of each scene is a standing/kneeling rough blowjob. Brandon Irons (AKA Alek James Hidell) is the male talent in each scene, and does a good job.

This was a 2001 movie and much rougher than the usual porn for the time. And, it still holds up well. Brandon slaps each whore several times, some harder than others. There is rough throat fucking, puking, and he uses some finger paint to paint the word cunt or slut or whore on each girl before cumming on her face or in her mouth. As he says in the youtube clip posted in GPT, each whore is interviewed before the scene and says she is OK with the rough stuff.

The DVD edition is well done, with chapter menu, a bonus scene, still pictures, etc. The girls all get naked, and they are not 10's, but they are not dogs, either. I'll give a brief description and some screen caps, but the whole of each scene is as I described above.

Fawnna

Pretty enough for porn. She is a puker!


She spits up very early.

She gives some shallow head after this, but Brandon gets her going again, she takes a fair amount of cock.


He writes "CUNT" on her forehead, cums on her tongue, and she swallows.

The rest of the scenes are very similar.


Natalya

This scene is outdoors next to the ocean. She is a pretty blone whore with a few extra pounds. She is a puker, and she takes some heavy slaps. Takes a lot of cock, too. He cums on her face and she eats it. Good scene.


"What am I? I don't even know what I am."


Diamond

Pimply blone girl with nice tits, indoor scene, follows the usual route. A little shorter than the other scenes.


Claudia Atkins

I like this girl, I saw her in a couple other bj movies. She takes a lot of cock, pukes, and they fuck. Great scene!


She brings a lot of heat.


Amber Wood

I saw her before sucking a thick cock in a hot scene. She is a puker here, turns in a great scene taking a lot of cock. Screens say "Puke #1", etc. He does not write anything on her.


Candy Cotton

She's almost fugly, hair looks like hell, but she is a rough rider for sure. He slaps her until her cheeks turn red, and pushes a lot of cock into her repeatedly. She gets a little sloppy but doesn't puke.


She might take the most cock.

He cums on her face and she eats it.


Montana

Another blone haired rough rider. Scene is in a bedroom, usual actions, she does a good job.


Princess

She is a bit of a plain looking brunette with flabby but kinda nice tits. A black screen with a dollar sign is shown during the interview. He slaps her until her cheeks turn red, then face fucks her until she pukes early. She pukes a lot. I like this shit. Then, he fucks her doggie on the bed, then a modified mish.


This one's for you, superloads!

Not a bad scene at all.

Cassie

A pretty young thing with too much makeup. Lots of ink stain on her left tit. After some oral, he fucks her doggie. She has a pimply butt. He then fucks her in her ass, slapping her face as he does it. She seems to like it. Decent scene, I guess.


Freshly fucked hole.


Celeste

Blone haired girl with a lot of acne. She probably takes the most slapping. She takes a lot of cock, too, and gets sloppy. He doesn't write on her. Cums on her face and she eats it. Good scene.


Monica Peterson

Blone girl with lots of freckles, chokes and pukes. She stays with the program, though, and turns in a good scene.


Shyann Mitchell

Skinny, pretty girl with ink stains. A lot of spit, but no puke. He fucks her doggie style. Decent scene.


Nadia

Pretty raven haired girl, starts with shallow head then Brandon steps it up.


This one leans back and lets him fuck her mouth.

Good scene.


Bonus Scene

Starts with two girls going at it, then a guy joins in and they both blow him. I don't know who any of the players are.


I know some of you like this.

They move to RCG, with pussy eating at the same time. Move to anal, with the clit being licked. There follows some pretty intense doggie, if you like 2 girls one guy, this is a great scene for you. There is an ATM with one girl taking the cock after it comes out of the other girl's ass. He cums on both their faces and they share it.


Well, that's it. I enjoyed viewing it several times, and it was fun to review. Definitely stellar for its time, and there are no clunker scenes at all. I rate it:


A vomit encrusted tit and a half.

-Chuck


Attachments
1.jpg (464 downloads)
2.jpg (462 downloads)
3.jpg (461 downloads)
4.jpg (462 downloads)
5.jpg (461 downloads)

_________________________
Fuck 'em all but nine.

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#526932 - 08/12/11 07:56 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
charin Offline
Gag Factor Guru
Porn Jesus

Registered: 07/15/05
Posts: 5290
Loc: Dayton
File holder post.


Attachments
6.jpg (463 downloads)
7.jpg (460 downloads)
8.jpg (459 downloads)
9.jpg (460 downloads)
tits.jpg (460 downloads)

_________________________
Fuck 'em all but nine.

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#526933 - 08/12/11 08:02 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
tattypatty Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 01/30/08
Posts: 7599
Loc: a site known for its tolerance...
great series . Natalya and Fawna are both great. Princess was never an attractive whore.
_________________________
"I'll never forget the moment during the lovely Alyssa Allure's scene in 'American Bukkake' where the fellow got out of his wheel chair to ejaculate on her face. It was grotesque but had a certain frisson." -Sock

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#527005 - 08/13/11 11:55 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
frankie fatale Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/30/09
Posts: 7671
Loc: paizuri,pizza,poodles,photo
the asslicker in that bonus scene looks like bridgette kerkove to me.






always a team player.

_________________________
i think of the past and how the future isnt how i imagined it,but the past is exactly where i unraveled it.excuses for failed attempts, gained another one i used a noose
it’s not until you fall apart you see the screws are loose-cage

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#527021 - 08/14/11 07:08 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
Thanks for Charin.

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#527048 - 08/14/11 01:00 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: Brandon_Iron]
smutspov Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 10/29/03
Posts: 9489
I wouldn't mind seeing somebody slap Brandon around.
_________________________
"I only insult those who deserve it." - Alfred E. Neuman

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#527093 - 08/15/11 05:43 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
No one's hands seem big enough. Only their mouths.

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#527094 - 08/15/11 06:02 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: smutspov]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
Originally Posted By: smutspov
I wouldn't mind seeing somebody slap Brandon around.


I believe Crystal Ray slapped him around pretty good in a meatholes scene.

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#527095 - 08/15/11 06:39 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
Yes, I have the ability to push people's buttons and send them over the edge. Some are tougher than others but all are within reach.

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#527106 - 08/15/11 09:19 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
I know you can. That's why I can't wait for you to push one of the really crazy whores over the edge.

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#527116 - 08/15/11 12:26 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
I have invited several to Alberta to tour Head Smashed in Buffalo Jump. (Yes, it's a real place.)

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#527117 - 08/15/11 12:41 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
What will happen when one jams a broken bottle into your neck or a stiletto heel into your eye socket? What if one gives you the Bobbitt treatment and you can't surgically re-attach? Would the life of a man that defines himself by his penis be worth living without one?

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#527119 - 08/15/11 01:40 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
Like a salamander, I will just re-grow a new one.

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#527120 - 08/15/11 01:50 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
Whatever, just promise to keep the camera rolling. I for one wouldn't want the world to miss the hilarity.

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#527121 - 08/15/11 02:42 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
I'm so used to bringing pleasure to women, to make one mad at me is unthinkable.

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#527122 - 08/15/11 03:41 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
I'm going to go out on a limb to say that most women wouldn't consider herpes a pleasure and most would be angry at you for bringing it to them.

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#527133 - 08/15/11 06:31 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
I'm going to go out on a limb and say you can't name one person who will say they caught an STD from me, ever.

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#527135 - 08/15/11 06:43 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
charin Offline
Gag Factor Guru
Porn Jesus

Registered: 07/15/05
Posts: 5290
Loc: Dayton
How about the sexually transmitted injury you gave to my hometown girl? I liked her.
_________________________
Fuck 'em all but nine.

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#527136 - 08/15/11 06:46 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
You mean I showed her a photo of you?

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#527138 - 08/15/11 07:16 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
This is the court of public opinion and you are guilty as charged, but you could still prove everyone wrong by showing your herpes test results, but we all know you won't, because you can't.

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#527140 - 08/15/11 07:34 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
I'm out of your jurisdiction. Case dismissed due to lack of evidence.

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#527148 - 08/15/11 08:52 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
Then show us the test Brando Baggins. You could shut us all down if you wanted to, but you won't, because you can't.

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#527160 - 08/16/11 07:05 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
My expensive legal team has informed me that the law works this way. First, you bring some sort of case. Then, I get the opportunity to confront my accuser. So far there has been 0 talent claim I've given them anything but a check and a good time. I am guilty of that.

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#527161 - 08/16/11 07:13 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
The court of public opinion is your accuser, judge, and executioner. Show us the test. Shut it all down. It's just that easy.

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#527164 - 08/16/11 07:35 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
I'm trying to find the address for the court so I can confront my accuser.

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#527165 - 08/16/11 07:43 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
Why not try to find those test results instead? That would end all of this once and for all.

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#527166 - 08/16/11 07:49 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
I'm afraid of needles. Also, the tail doesn't wag the dog.

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#527167 - 08/16/11 07:58 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
Shut it down, or suck it up. Those are your only choices.

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#527171 - 08/16/11 08:05 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
Not true. I can do nothing and stoke the fires fuelling your anger.
In an effort to make nice, I invite you to enjoy the photos of my recent travels: http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10150248769347723.320613.501862722

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#527173 - 08/16/11 08:15 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
There's where you went off the track, Brando. To be angry would imply some sort of care one way or another on my part. I can assure you I could care less whether you live or die. Hell I can't imagine it would matter to anyone.

Shut it down, or suck it up.

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#527174 - 08/16/11 08:16 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
Which is your favorite pic?

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#527175 - 08/16/11 08:25 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
I have no interest in your perverse desire to spread herpes throughout the world. Besides we all know they're just going to be more pictures of your peen.

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#527177 - 08/16/11 09:00 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
There is one pic in the group, it's true. Still can't find anyone to back up what you say? Are you Sean from TRPWL?

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#527178 - 08/16/11 09:15 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
I have pictures from you blocked. You must understand that being on this site for so long, I just can't take any more of your hideous wang pics. They have become so (e-trade baby slow blink) haunting.

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#527179 - 08/16/11 09:24 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
You're saying my penis is in...your...head? What are you really trying to say?

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#527180 - 08/16/11 09:27 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
No it just looks like such an infected horror and it is.

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#527181 - 08/16/11 09:31 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
To hundreds of women...no. To one lonely, confused XPT poster....well, only you can answer that.

I'm not your Bert, Ernie. Sorry.

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#527182 - 08/16/11 09:41 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
Brando, There is a little something that has never been able to penetrate your herpes addled brain and that is, if I had spent as much money on hookers as you have, I could have been laid as much as you have. More because the majority of the lays in my life have been free and I know you can't say the same.

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#527183 - 08/16/11 10:07 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
If you've been laid as much as I have, I congratulate you, Casanova. I am an average, short, balding man with mediocre talents yet I have enjoyed the company of hundreds of women aged 18-25. It could not happen without porn, greed, and a pussy-divining rod in my pants.

Still, it did happen. Right now, at this very moment, I am ejaculating into a woman's mouth on hundreds of laptops, netbooks, IPads, and government computers.

Your next argument: If I had spent as much money on computers as Bill Gates, I could have owned Microsoft. Uhhhh....no. You're no Bill Gates, sir, and you're even less of a Brandon Iron.

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#527184 - 08/16/11 10:12 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
Much like pleasuring a woman, you are not very good at this. So go back to wherever it is you're infecting these young women and take a 1000 more pictures of the only part of you ever worth anything and please quit trying to share them with me. Thanks.

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#527185 - 08/16/11 10:22 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
I'm not trying to share anything with you. Like a crying baby who fights off sleep by screaming louder, you are the one who keeps coming back....and back....and back. Like the book title reads, Go the F**k to Sleep!

If you don't like the candy, stay out of the store. Looks like someone has a sweet tooth. I'm not your Sugar Daddy, sorry.

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#527186 - 08/16/11 10:32 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
Then quit trying link me to your dick pics. I told you I don't want to see them. Keep them to yourself or the other perves who are interested in midget schlong.

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#527188 - 08/16/11 10:45 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
Lullaby and goodnight, with roses bedight
With lilies o'er spread is baby's wee bed
Lay thee down now and rest, may thy slumber be blessed
Lay thee down now and rest, may thy slumber be blessed

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#527190 - 08/16/11 10:52 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
Uh, Brandon, unlike you I am a productive human being, which means I'm awake during normal business hours. If you're too tired to continue your attempt to bore the board with yet another flurry of dick pics, then go to sleep yourself.

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#527192 - 08/16/11 11:10 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
My job title "Producer" means, literally, that I'm a productive human being. I'm also a Director. I direct you to stop your incessant talk about my penis. It's not a soother, baby. Go to f**k to sleep!

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#527194 - 08/16/11 11:18 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
The only thing you produce are dick pics to show to other men. If you believe that makes you productive, then so be it.

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#527195 - 08/16/11 11:42 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
What will it take to get you to stop talking about my penis? It's as if you have nothing else to say. Oh.....

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#527197 - 08/16/11 11:55 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
That's because you have nothing else to show, except the whole entire universe of your miserable existence, your penis. I will quit talking about it when you quit trying to make me look at pictures of it.

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#527198 - 08/16/11 11:59 AM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
Brandon_Iron Offline
Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus

Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
That's why I was showing my pics from Amsterdam and Brussels: http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10150248769347723.320613.501862722

For the record, it takes a pretty weak individual to force himself to look at every dick photo he himself clicks on. It makes as much sense as repeatedly posting in a thread created by someone else featuring dick pics.

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#527199 - 08/16/11 12:00 PM Re: Slap Happy 2 [Re: charin]
have2cit Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
Quit sending me pictures of your infected wang. I'm just deleting them before I open them anyway, you fucking fruit.

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