Now that you're feeding him attention you get to pet him too.

Things that have happened since last year:

I did some Caribbean cruising.
I used a cabbie in Columbia who once lived 7 blocks from me in Weehawken.
I rode a transcontinental train from the Atlantic to the Pacific in a couple hours going north.
Spent a week in Burbank just off the I-5.
Joined a synagogue.
Became a C.O.P. like that Zimmerman guy.
Had my parked car hit by a legally blind guy driving illegally.
Collected more than 500 2 dollar bills.
Finally moved to a smartphone.
Watched the second season of Banshee and The Following.
DVRed but still to watch the 3rd season of Homeland.
Called Met GM Alderson a Vietnam-era marine-trained LIAR more than thrice online.
Used the law of cosines to find distances to build a pool in upstate NY.
Found an article in Argosy about my mom's brother being a hero of early Israel.
Traumatised by witnessing an old man suffer mud-butt thru his bathing suit.
Had my $600+ Oakley prescription sunglasses stolen from me in Miami.
Converted my sister's lecture presentation from DVD to MP4 on sticks.
Enjoyed getting mail addressed to "Angry Fatman".
Helped my brother shop for a Mastercraft 190 Prostar.
Proved that my cousins' 1st wife was Eleanor Parker's daughter, not Otto Preminger's.
Learned another CA cousin's wife was picked by James Caan on the Dating Game.
Survived a visit to Disney World, Epcot, et. al. I liked it better in 1973.
Sat directly under Howie Rose at a spring training game in Jupiter.
Discovered a couple new, recent Gauge scenes.
Repressed saying "Tatts ruin whores!" when introduced to my bro's bartender girlfriend.
Found movies of me kissing my cousin Debra on the mouth. We were 1.
Angered a woman because I moved to the middle seat to let a family sit together.
Lost my password to my GDClyde email.
Found out I rather watch the NFL on the redzone than watch games.
Permitted a cortisone shot to my ailing knee.
Had a huge possum growl at me in my COP car.
Got a bluray player that has internet access and lets me use sticks to play my pirated porn.
Discovered LA drivers are much more likely to let you cut in than NY drivers.
Found my ViewMaster and my collection of disks. Still works. Somewhat.
Cleaned and attributed some Roman Coins. Best was a Constantine II "cent", ca 337 CE.
Shipped 100s of lbs of books, tapes and CDs via media mail.
Twice I was the only passenger on the QM5 from Bryant Park to Little Neck. Took the LIE.
Buried my step-father.
Inherited his few Morgan silver dollars and a seated liberty half dollar.
Joined a writing club. Writing again. Others enjoy my crap.

Good to read your posts again, Fatman. Most Jews are lying low these days.

They are? Why? Because of the Gaza stuff?


Doesn't involve me. I'm not much of a Zionist.

Yeah that's what I was referring to. With a Muslim in the White House their lobbying efforts over here are falling short. Y'all still control Hollywood and the banks though, right?

The only group more powerful than the Jews is the gay Jews. That will never change. Presidents and studio presidents come and go, but they still answer to the money men.

The Jews answer to the Reptilians. That was the trade off for teaching them shapeshifting.

Damn.

I'm not in Hollywood. Not a bankers. And, I can't shapeshift.

Maybe I'm really a goy!




Wasn't there a movie with Rowdy Roddy Piper where there were these alien shapeshifters who brainwashed people in to not seeing them and he needed special glasses to see them but they gave him a headache until he got contacts?

Are you saying that was a documentary?

Could I like Fed-Ex you 24 Donuts just to shut you the Fuck Up for a day or two..?

They Live is the only Piper movie I can remember the name of. Only thing I ever saw him act in was Tag Team, the pilot for a buddy cop show w/ Jesse Ventura.

I'd like to fedex you this morning's dump in a shoebox.

Nice--You're really starting to grow on me.!

And you didn't even call me Bungsmell I think this could be the start of us becoming tight what do you think....! Friends(is that to early.??)

See all the good you have brought Fat-Ass

Wow, next thing ya know Bornyo and Richard will be talking enwurd lynchings and muskrat stew recipes.

I don't think so. I called him bungsmell in some other thread.

I've eaten squirrel on a stick many a time and I also own firearms-I think it could work..

He appears to be over looking that, for the greater good.



What are your thoughts on antique tractors and rebar?

It's not the rebar as much as the lime and salt that turns it to dust. Or some such shit.

I'm on a low carb diet. I've never been a donut person. Pastries, yes.

A case of steaks would be welcome.

Fuck, I haven't had a steak in forever. Beef is stupid expensive. How's the low carb doing?

Low or no carb is the way to go. You are never hungry and for some reason the weight just goes away. Chicken is almost as expensive as beef. I found a butcher with local grass-fed beef ribeyes for 5.99/lb this week. I just stopped in for lunch and no way to get the meat home with what I had to do the rest of the day. I'm going back and stocking up.

Fatman's last response in this thread was classic Fatman.

It's going well. Like Bornyo said, I'm not all that hungry.

My carbs are mostly in the form of eggs and vegetables. I don't really count the carbs in most veggies. I mostly have garlic, onions, peppers, spinach, mushrooms and the occasional squash.

My meat is mostly chicken and seafood. This week's fish is squid, catfish and salmon. The last because it's on sale. I've got about 1/3 of a pound of the squid left to fry.

I usually slice the veggies in the cuisinart and fry them with a little olive oil spray in a non-stick pan. While they are cooking I give a little dusting of chili powder to the mix of chicken and squid. I then add them in and cook them up. Once they are doing well I add the spinach leaves.

It's pretty good.

I've been cooking early in the day since I don't eat much after lunch. So I delay lunch a bit, snacking on deli and some cheese and don't bother with dinner.

Desert is usually pre-sliced Costco almonds covered in whipped cream, which has very little carbs.

As for steak, I don't get it much. In part because I don't have a grill here yet. But, price is a factor.

I did have an Outback lunch steak for my birthday. But, I'm no a huge Outback kind'a guy.

It might more properly be said that I saute than I fry. I guess. There isn't much oil at all.

We've been pretty lucky here with chicken and pork prices. In a pinch you can get boneless/ skinless chicken breasts or pork ribs or steaks for under $2/lb. Beef is crazy, tho. Hamburger is $4+/lb.

So I'm driving the C.O.P. car and a call comes over the scanner where a guy's license comes back invalid and he's got priors including previously driving without a valid license, warrants including one for breaking an order of protection.

I'm saying there is at least one guy in Florida whose night is going to get worse.

If I hadn't said it before, on this most recent return from parts unknown, may I formally state Welcome Back el Gordo Hermano

FAIR WARNING

The notorious promoter of sororal polygyny known to many as The FatMan will be unleashed on the NYC area from Wed the 3rd of September thru the 10th day of that same month.

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!

Thx!!

Sounds more like a dare than a warning, but I'm in. Gian Jerkins says she's in as well, though she's back from hiatus and can say so herself. Jerky, you in? I figure the last week of summer is prime time for XPT's top four prolific posters to go hunt the Panzer in it's natural habitat.

Catch and release? Photo safari? The 3 of us hold him down while Gia shaves "XPT" in his back hair?

I just thought of this and checked the user list. I think I know why Fatman came back. He saw that Gia pulled within 500-600 posts, so he's gonna drop a quick thousand on us, then disappear again by October, to stretch his lead.

I think it depends on where he's grazing gavone-ing whatever he calls it when he shovels shit in his squwakbox.

Can't we nominate someone else to get near Panzer's skin? I'm trying to maintain an appetite today.

And I'm going out of town Sept 5th for a month. So, the earlier in Fatman's vacation, the better. Not because I'm trying to ruin it or anything.

He who hunts Tranzers should look to it that he himself does not become a Tranzer. And when you spot a Tranzer, the Tranzer also spots you.

Alright, we'll change "shaves "XPT" in his back hair" to "carves xpt, mansonlike, into his forehead with a boxcutter"

Or simply celebrate the Grassisimus what be Uomo and mock tourists.

Nah. I figured both she and Tranzer passed me long, long ago.

I came back because I actually voted for Dave Pounder in a school board race.

He didn't do well. More people made no vote [1800+] than voted for him [800+]. Though I did find that there are 10 other perverts besides me in this neighborhod. He got 11 votes from our "district" which only includes the 7 neighborhoods of the master homeowners' association.

So, if I need it, I've got a minyan.




Oddly, to me, no one seems interested in a porn guy running for school board on this site but me. Maybe if I could get WarMachine to punch in his teeth ...........

OK. I have to deal with my sin.


Yesterday I broke yet ANOTHER promise I made to myself.


I vowed NEVER EVER to break the barrier that separates me as an anonymous over-poster and actually face those that suffer my passive-aggressive provocations.

I met with JB and Ms. Jordan.


I have always felt it was too precarious. I reveal too much about subconscious and inner-turmoil. A Donkey-type could use that to embarrass my family, et. all.

That, and it spoils the mystery. I'm far too "normal" for my persona. Especially now that I'm not having much mania. Depression, too infrequent, do occur. But, they have direct causes. And, with the sunshine in FL, they burn away in the bright sun after a few laps in the pool. No more the wild man. Shaved and #2 crew cut. I look like every over-weight office-loser on a casual Friday everyday.

Fatman, you have excellent taste in libations, and it was awesome hanging out with you and JB. Last time JB and I went drinking was with my ex-bf in said ex's neighborhood which I've nicknamed The Van Nuys of Brooklyn.

Great conversation and good times. I can't think 'good times' without thinking christiansingstheblues- Christian, I hope you're still writing. Fatman, you thought I'd be tall just as I expected you to show up as a slovenly, dishoveled fat mess. Nope. Everyone, Fatman is a clean cut, well-dressed attractive fat guy. I saw him standing outside when I walked in and sat with my Jameson/Diet and my phone, but one can't really approach strangers (especially quite large strangers) with, "Excuse me, are you Fatman?"

Good times!

And Gypsy sends her love, but she's busy with the new dog and her Skillz' DIY home renovations.

It was a good bourbon I never had before. 1776. I've seen it reviewed but hadn't tried it yet. I try to drink good bourbons in bars. Or an Irish Whisky. Never got into Ryes. My dad was a Canadian Club guy in his albeit brief Wall Street days. Might try one or two in the coming year.


However, at home, my rare drinks are straight high-end scotch. But, only GOOD scotch. I've a nice single malt collection. But, I'm a sucker for JW. I've got bottles Black, Blue and Green.

I can't stand paying for good scotch in a NY bar. Especially when I believe myself cheated, tasting harshness in what I believe in JW Red when I ordered and PAID a premium for black.

But, unlike scotch, I find it's harder to ruin a bourbon. Or maybe I don't disdain bad bourbon. So, in NY bars, I order bourbon.

You mean your online persona? Nobody is normal online.
What was the bigger problem originally? Mania? or depression? I have used Cymbalta for 5 years now and it definitely floats me up from the bottom. On the other hand, I find it is now easier to become over-mood stimulated through alcohol or even just a bright sunny day (or both). The best thing for stopping over-stimulated rampages is food and then maybe a little weed.

Right now I keep a fresh blended vegetable smoothie (sometimes with fruit) in the fridge I can grab a start nursing like a beer. You can add supplements and protein powder to suit. It's good for weight, health, and diet control. Good for blood sugar and related mood issues. And if you do it right it tastes great too. Eat any meat you like but simple carbs must be very limited. I still break down and eat fries once in a while but you just learn to substitute for flour, rice, potatoes, and excess sugar whenever you can. Avoid boxed or canned foods. For example Minute Rice has twice the glycemic level of regular white rice. Of course, I know it is difficult to get into the habit of cooking for oneself and much more gratifying to just grab something at the joint down the street.

Anyway,good luck in the "normal" world - haha whatever that is!

I went with "George David Clyde". Good times indeed.

Depression. I was misdiagnosed for decades as depression. The issue was that anti-depressants would work WONDERFULLY ... or so it seemed. It would, as the dosage increased over time, kick me into a very effective hypo-mania ... which then crashed me harder into depression than ever before. So, I stopped seeing psychiatrists completely for a long time.

My drug of choice, that worked until I was too old and out of shape to overcome its downsides was SUGAR. Massive amounts of SUGAR. I ate Twinkies with "orange sugar poison" as a GF called my drink of choice. The sweeter the faux-orange-aid the better.

My new doctor wants to try Cymbalta since it thinks it will also help my knees but is, on the other hand, a bit hesitant since I'm fairly stable.




My "normal" is that I APPEAR to be a conservative guy. When I'm not sick, locking myself away for months, etc., I look like your average overweight accountant in "dress casual".

My online persona IS me. I'm not putting on airs or embellishing or acting a part. I'm basically a guy who is entertained by people and, more often, by himself.

What doesn't come through on this board, because I post so much, is that I'm a good listener. I love other people's stories. I used to love daBurglar's stuff. I just imbibed his tome posts. What does come through is that I have something to say on everything. I can't let it go. Even if what I have to say is that your story trumps mine!

Which I WILL happily concede. I don't mind being bested. Never has, never will impact me to acknowledge the fact that another is the better one that day.

My dress shirt and khakis appearance, when stable, doesn't match the unstable persona underneath.

He definitely loved my stories. Especially, the one about the twins which I hope would ruin his love for them forever...haha. It didn't. He just shrugged and said he wasn't surprised.

My normal is since I don't have a mate, people assume:
1) I'm gay
2) I'm a perv (watch your kids around me)
3) I'm a lazy masturbator (closest to truth)

The truth is I am a finicky whoremonger that is most comfortable separating sex from the emotion and interdependency of personal relationships. Thankfully I made it through the stripper phase of my life without an STD or getting burned big-time financially by the whore. Since being on Cymbalta my sex drive is decreased reducing my urges to have my dick rubbed by some 19 year old strippers ass.

No one has to keep their kids from me. I HATE kids. People who know about my porn collection force their kids upon me just to try to have me interact with kids. Until they can have an adult conversation, I think they belong in the womb.

Most parents are aware that the people who hurt kids devise ways of being around them, so my full on retreat rightfully turns off any danger warnings.


I'm pretty asexual now, so, like you, it is often that is assumed as likely gay. Also, I will not date. My dating career is over. I HATE dating. My last date of even the remotest kind was in 2004, and that really wasn't a date. The one before that, which was a date, was in 1997. Two possible dates in 17 years. People will think you gay.

I am messed up with bipolar. It impacts relationships badly. While one day I can be super attentive and engaging, you might not hear from me for a month or two or six and then, like I do here, I show up as if nothing is odd about that.

Fiend would very likely term me a wimp. Not only couldn't I hit a female, I HATE even making one I care about remotely sad. My last real relationship that mattered to me ended in 1981 as a disaster. So, long ago I settled into enjoying watching. I liked porn before that. Now it became my entire outlet.

I'd have occasion at times to drift from being a watcher to participant, but these were fleeting affairs which either I didn't want to last or knew wouldn't even if I wanted it.

My brother, who in my opinion is the far more attractive man both "then" [as young men, when I wasn't obese] and now, and has a mountain of conquest still feels I got the two hottest chicks who both turned him down first. And, one was when I was a real fattie.

So, unlike me, it bothers him when my relatives take my lack of participation in the dating game as possible gayness. He decided to let them in on my porn addiction, if I may call it that, and my predilection for the barely legal genre.

I'd be better thought of in my extended family as "gay" than the pedophile they've cast me for liking women from 18-25. I don't help myself when I point out that if I could get a 16 year old in NJ or PA to fuck me it would be legal ... as long as I didn't film it.

1. In a Joey Silvera movie I saw Cali taste Cherish's "stuff that the left on the floor".

2. I read their MySpace blogs, rants, poems and posts with the same profound interest I had in your stories. I am likely the only one on Earth who read that stuff. You couldn't get anyone to believe the stuff they said and did as fiction.

3. I no longer on-line-stalk, but on occasion I have peaked at their facebooks and tweets. OMFG!!!

Q.E.D. Nothing they do surprises me.

Honestly Gia, I was a really cute guy in high school and college. I've dated cheerleaders and homecoming queens. I'm a caring, sensitive guy who is a mix of gentle and perverted, so I could get girls. A variety of factors made me unable to keep them very long.

But, the fact is that white trashy girls never went for me AT ALL. Hot messes like THE Twins wouldn't give me the time of day. They like the garbage like the rejects these two mated with.

So I think the largest part of my attraction to them is that they find me more disgusting than you find them! Imagine overcoming that level of rejection!




Although if I had a 2-3 hundred I was willing to drop and found myself in or around Cleveland, I could most likely have sex with both of them tomorrow ..... but, they'd still be disgusted with me.

I NEVER allow myself to be in a situation where a kid could make an accusation of abuse. The strippers really liked my attitude towards children because they had similar issues.

This sounds very similar to me but I would not call being attentive and engaging "mania". When drunk of course things get a little crazy bu even then the worst thing I do is send out funny and sometimes embarrassing emails.

Thanks Brother! That really helped! I had a good friend write a letter to the court in a matter we were involved in stating that I "chatted with underage children on the internet". He was out to get me and hired an internet whiz to search the web and found an association of my name with my porn name. Of course the judge completely disregarded his false claim as it had nothing to do with the court matter.

The gay reputation works for me too - I just tell the ladies I am a lesbian trapped in a man's body. I don't have a penchant for the teens anymore anyway. I just think of MILFs as being really experienced whores and even more desperate at their stage of life. lol

I always pictured Fatman as Ignatius P. O'Riley from "Confederacy of Dunces". Sounds like you keep it together a little better than him. Outwardly, at least.

I hate I missed the party.