I am a big fan of Bill Maher. Great commentator and I love how he speaks his mind. I’m reading NEW RULES: POLITE MUSINGS FROM A TIMID OBSERVER and it’s great. Highly recommended! I have to share one of his New Rules entitled Taint Misbehavin’:

Abstinence pledges make you horny. In a setback for the morals/values crowd, a new 8-year study reveals that American teenagers who take “virginity” pledges wind up with just as many STDs as the other kids do. But that’s not all — taking the pledge also makes a teenage girl six times more likely to perform oral sex and four times more likely to allow anal. Which leads me to an important question: Where were these pledges when I was in high school?

Seriously, when I was a teenager, the only kids having anal intercourse were the ones who missed. My idea of lubrication was oiling my bike chain. If I had known I could have been getting porn-star sex the same year I took Algebra II simply by joining up with the Christian Right, I’d have been so down with Jesus, they would have had to pry me out of the pew.

There are a lot worse things than teenagers having sex — namely, teenagers not having sex. Here’s something you’ll never her: “That suicide bomber blew himself up because he was having too much sex. Sex, sex, sex, nonstop. All that crazy Arab ever had was sex, and look what happened.”

The theory of the puritans of the 21st century seems to be: The less kids know about sex, the better. Because people who talk about pee-pees are potty mouths. And so armed with limited knowledge and believing regular vaginal intercourse to be either immaculate or filthy dirty, these kids did with their pledge what everybody does with contracts: They found loopholes — two of them, to be exact.

Is there any greater irony than the fact that the Christian Right actually got their precious little adolescent daughters to say to their freshly scrubbed boyfriends: “Please, I want to remain pure for my wedding night, so only in the ass. Then I’ll blow you.” Well, at least these kids are really thinking outside the box.


For more info, visit www.billmaher.com.