This week's installment of XPT Theater:
Coke Stevenson: XPT's Proudest Pedophile

Opening scene

Fade in to a wide shot of a hideously ugly skinny pale troglodyte getting off the municipal transit shuttle from the city daycare center for slow adults as he walks across the street with the exaggerated swagger of an openly gay female impersonator on Homosexual Pride Day. He makes his way to the abandoned, condemned housing project building he calls home, beaming with pride over how far he has come from his days sleeping in cardboard boxes.

Pushing aside the wooden planks that serve as a door he is greeted with the unmistakable sound of a woman grunting while sucking on something that lets him know at once that his mother is "working". The pasty pencil necked dweeb (Coke Stephenson) completely used to this way of life steps over dead cockroaches and rat feces to find his mother servicing two men while covered in drying urine as is her way.

Coke: "Duhhhh... Guess what, Ma?"

Coke's whore mother: (first pulling the rancid cock of a homeless unwashed black man out of her mouth) "I don't know son, what?"

(goes back to sucking cock as her head is violently yanked back into position)

Coke: "Duhhhh.. Today some big doodie head on XPT told everybody about how I'm a gay pedophile, but there was a poll and I only came in second place with 31 votes!"

Cokes whore mom: (barely audible muffled voice as the homeless black man refuses to allow her to pull his dick out of her mouth this time) "Mmmmmmfff... errrr... REALLY son, you mean this time you weren't the one picked as most likely to be the pedophile for a change? Mmmmmfff ugghh slobber."

Coke: "Uh Duhhhhhhhh... Yeah Ma! And I really told him off when I called that big mean guy a GOMER! Hee hee snort." (now jumping up and down clapping his hands) "I called him a GOMER, over and over and I laughed and laughed until the mean lady at the daycare center for slow adults made me get off the computer, put on my safety helmet again and take more of my psych meds" (now hysterically giggling and hugging himself while rocking back and forth).

Coke's whore mom: "Mmmmffff... slobber... gulp.. Oh, my little Cokie, if only your father wasn't in federal prison again for raping farm animals, he would be so proud. THIS is your finest day."

Coke: "Derrrr.... I know Mom, I know. I'm special."


Fade to black

The End