Pavlovian response. Honestly, I expected a little less drama queen than ^. So I understand your frustration, and I am sorry, sorry you're in a virtual dead heat to clinch this thing (that's what this is really about). And you deserve it, especially after the 2009 you had.

When you're in custody and your ass is up for grabs, who will weep for ye? I will. Remember, if you accept the pain, it cannot hurt you.

If I were you I'd load all of that shit into a big trailer and drive it off a cliff while there's still time.