Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league

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#480647 - 03/09/10 07:26 PM Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Coke banned by Monkey Whoremaster Registered: 06/22/07 Posts: 2656 Loc: Polekatz, Rte 43	Barry is a troubled 45 year-old. He looks 75+. He has round pig-like facial features. He wears a long grey beard to compensate for the lack of hair on his head and to hide his 3 chins. He is morbidly obese. He so is fat and ugly that he seems asexual, like a weird plant. He probably hasn't been able see his dick under his gut without looking in a mirror for over 10 years. He's probably incapable of becoming erect. He probably can't reach his ass to wipe himself after dropping one of his 10 lb bowel movements. But, as the expression goes, there is someone out there for everyone. Let's test this and brainstorm to see if we can come up with a female in Barry's league. Maybe we can give him some hope! Attachments 475026-14079.jpg (19 downloads) _________________________ "You have been banned from making any new posts or sending private messages. The reason for this ban is: meh, cause i can"
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#480648 - 03/09/10 07:27 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Coke banned by Monkey Whoremaster Registered: 06/22/07 Posts: 2656 Loc: Polekatz, Rte 43	candidate #1: feminist Andrea Dworkin Andrea is actually ugly and fat enough to be Barry's mother. This could be a plus because it's likely Barry wants a gal that reminds him of mom. Unfortunately, this perfect candidate was a man hating dyke so it never would have worked. Attachments 475028-Dworkin.png (15 downloads) _________________________ "You have been banned from making any new posts or sending private messages. The reason for this ban is: meh, cause i can"
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#480649 - 03/09/10 07:32 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Coke banned by Monkey Whoremaster Registered: 06/22/07 Posts: 2656 Loc: Polekatz, Rte 43	candidate #2: Blair's retarded cousin from 'The Facts of Life' (AKA comedian Geri Jewell) Geri's fucked up. She's retarded and that crooked face is not pleasant to look at. But, still, she's WAY out of Barry's league. Darn, this is going to be hard. Attachments 475030-1016_geri_jewell_01_wi.jpg (14 downloads) _________________________ "You have been banned from making any new posts or sending private messages. The reason for this ban is: meh, cause i can"
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#480650 - 03/09/10 07:38 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Coke banned by Monkey Whoremaster Registered: 06/22/07 Posts: 2656 Loc: Polekatz, Rte 43	candidate #3: Precious Precious is a fucking cow, but right now she's "the it cow". After her fame fades, she might be willing to hang out with Barry at all-you-can-eat buffets. But, let's face it, she'd eventually drop the "I just want to be friends" line on him. This is hard. Does anyone have any ideas? Let's show Barry that in theory there actually could be a match for him in the world. Attachments 475032-precious-movie-theaters-opening-date-release-push-novel-november-6-20.jpg (19 downloads) _________________________ "You have been banned from making any new posts or sending private messages. The reason for this ban is: meh, cause i can"
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#480651 - 03/09/10 07:53 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Third Axis Max Hardcore Prison Bitch Registered: 02/02/10 Posts: 165 Loc: Golden State of mind	Dude, you need to get away from the computer. Get laid. Make some egg salad. Organize the workbench in the garage. Blast the weeds in the yard with some Roundup. This Barry fixation is not healthy.
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#480652 - 03/09/10 07:55 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
electrostatic Porn Jesus Registered: 08/16/08 Posts: 4257 Loc: Counting Kisses	Me and my BF have this thing where we call people "Precious" if we think they're fat. As in "Isn't she Precious?." or "Wow Jenny, you've been looking mighty Precious lately." That is all. By any chance are you talking about Mandy's Barry?... _________________________ "Nature already created the perfect dishwasher....its called a woman." - Fiend
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#480653 - 03/09/10 08:08 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Anonymous Unregistered	Quote: candidate #1: feminist Andrea Dworkin Umm, Coke? I think she's more in Moblem's league than Barry's, and has been for almost five years.
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#480654 - 03/09/10 08:12 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
electrostatic Porn Jesus Registered: 08/16/08 Posts: 4257 Loc: Counting Kisses	Quote: She kinda reminds me of: _________________________ "Nature already created the perfect dishwasher....its called a woman." - Fiend
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#480655 - 03/09/10 08:13 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Coke banned by Monkey Whoremaster Registered: 06/22/07 Posts: 2656 Loc: Polekatz, Rte 43	Quote: Quote: candidate #1: feminist Andrea Dworkin Umm, Coke? I think she's more in Moblem's league than Barry's, and has been for almost five years. This is a theoretical exercise. We're not going to literally find a compatible female. We're just exploring if it's possible. _________________________ "You have been banned from making any new posts or sending private messages. The reason for this ban is: meh, cause i can"
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#480656 - 03/09/10 08:19 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Anonymous Unregistered	Quote: This is a theoretical exercise. We're not going to literally find a compatible female. We're just exploring if it's possible. Uh-HUH. Right. Theoretical exercise. Sorry. I misunderestimated you. Carry on.
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#480657 - 03/09/10 09:16 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
**LG*** Porn Jesus Registered: 06/05/05 Posts: 4468 Loc: Great America	Quote: candidate #3: Precious Precious is a fucking cow, but right now she's "the it cow". After her fame fades, she might be willing to hang out with Barry at all-you-can-eat buffets. But, let's face it, she'd eventually drop the "I just want to be friends" line on him. This is hard. Does anyone have any ideas? Let's show Barry that in theory there actually could be a match for him in the world.
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#480658 - 03/09/10 09:17 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
**LG*** Porn Jesus Registered: 06/05/05 Posts: 4468 Loc: Great America
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#480659 - 03/09/10 09:23 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Anonymous Unregistered	Good God, Coke. You've put both Cindi and her mullet to sleep. Angry graemlin from the poster currently known as "Fuck You" in 3... 2... 1...
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#480660 - 03/09/10 09:27 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
TonyBaloney Max Hardcore Prison Bitch Registered: 12/17/09 Posts: 219
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#480661 - 03/09/10 09:35 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Sammura33 AC Cream Wannabe Registered: 08/25/04 Posts: 449 Loc: illy-noise	Quote: LOVE ME SOME GINGERS! _________________________ Re: FUCK YOU From: Smelly Monkey I love you bitch FUCK YOU LOOKN AT?
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#480662 - 03/09/10 11:40 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Barry the Pirate Porn Jesus Registered: 12/09/08 Posts: 8433 Loc: Great Pacific Northwest	Quote: Quote: LOVE ME SOME GINGERS! Yeeheehee. That's great, Summy. I'd never even heard the term "ginger" until the South park ep. My folks must've kept me away from it because of the redhair, freckled, pasty white untannable skin thing. And what the fuck is up with Carrottop? When did he become this roided up freak? _________________________ Having killed someone doesn't make you a killer- @KINGROCHE
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#480663 - 03/09/10 11:45 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Barry the Pirate Porn Jesus Registered: 12/09/08 Posts: 8433 Loc: Great Pacific Northwest	Quote: Barry is a troubled 45 year-old. He looks 75+. He has round pig-like facial features. He wears a long grey beard to compensate for the lack of hair on his head and to hide his 3 chins. He is morbidly obese. He so is fat and ugly that he seems asexual, like a weird plant. He probably hasn't been able see his dick under his gut without looking in a mirror for over 10 years. He's probably incapable of becoming erect. He probably can't reach his ass to wipe himself after dropping one of his 10 lb bowel movements. But, as the expression goes, there is someone out there for everyone. Let's test this and brainstorm to see if we can come up with a female in Barry's league. Maybe we can give him some hope! A whole thead all about little o'l me. Aww. How adorable. somebody wants his daddy to notice him. You're such a sweet, handdsome little boy. But, Cokee, daddy doesn't have the time or interest to play with his little boy right now. But don't worry, little boy. We'll play again really soon. When I decide to. Keep trying, little shaver. Very truly yours, Daddy Barry _________________________ Having killed someone doesn't make you a killer- @KINGROCHE
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#480664 - 03/10/10 12:06 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
faceblaster Elder of Zion Porn Jesus Registered: 05/06/04 Posts: 5213 Loc: watching Bad Ronald	Wait, Carrot top is a paraplegic? _________________________ I really wanted to go to that Bukake because I thought for sure that you were going to be on the receiving end. - Ryan Knox to Jeff Steward
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#480665 - 03/10/10 01:30 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Claude Goddard Whoremaster Registered: 06/16/07 Posts: 2512 Loc: Slumberland	Quote: He so is fat and ugly that he seems asexual, like a weird plant. I don't want to encourage Coke but this is a good line.
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#480666 - 03/10/10 06:23 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
gia jordan Porn Jesus Registered: 09/07/05 Posts: 14160 Loc: NYC	Barry, I don't hate you, but I have a question. At what point did you just let yourself go? Why do you look so unsanitary and disheveled? _________________________ "What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#480667 - 03/10/10 06:33 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Bishop Registered Sex Offender Registered: 12/13/03 Posts: 2376 Loc: Rockin' the Z5U	No Gia, don't hold back.Tell him how you really feel _________________________ "I hope someone runs you over with their car."-guapo
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#480668 - 03/10/10 07:10 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
charin Gag Factor Guru Porn Jesus Registered: 07/15/05 Posts: 5290 Loc: Dayton	I've worked for two bearded guys named Andy in my recent carreer, and Andy Baird was the original inspiration for me to plan to live the last few decades of my life as an RV vagabond. _________________________ Fuck 'em all but nine.
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#480669 - 03/10/10 07:32 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Steezo Porn Jesus Registered: 01/11/06 Posts: 5287 Loc: Anchorage, Alaska	Quote: Why do you look so unsanitary and disheveled? Actually, he kind of looks like a bbq "chef." When I got a new grill a while back, people kept giving me bbq cookbooks as gifts. They would always have some older, disheveled guy on the cover standing next to a grill, holding a pair of tongs. Attachments 475122-barbecueamerica.jpg (7 downloads) _________________________ "Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars." - Martin Luther King, Jr.
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#480670 - 03/10/10 08:59 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Barry the Pirate Porn Jesus Registered: 12/09/08 Posts: 8433 Loc: Great Pacific Northwest	Quote: Quote: Why do you look so unsanitary and disheveled? Actually, he kind of looks like a bbq "chef." When I got a new grill a while back, people kept giving me bbq cookbooks as gifts. They would always have some older, disheveled guy on the cover standing next to a grill, holding a pair of tongs. And I do love to grill. Not enough to write a book, or make my own sauces or rubs or whatever. Off the shelf is Ok at my house. Disheveled with tongs, Barry _________________________ Having killed someone doesn't make you a killer- @KINGROCHE
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#480671 - 03/10/10 09:14 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Coke banned by Monkey Whoremaster Registered: 06/22/07 Posts: 2656 Loc: Polekatz, Rte 43	candidates #4 & #5 These two gals might actually think Barry is a dreamboat. Well, I should correct that. They'd treat him like a dreamboat, but deep down they'd know he's fat and ugly. Afterall, they have an eye. Sadly, it could never work. Bary could never get any privacy with either twin and petty jealousies would doom the relationships. Drats! Back to square one. Attachments 475134-schappel.jpg (9 downloads) _________________________ "You have been banned from making any new posts or sending private messages. The reason for this ban is: meh, cause i can"
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#480672 - 03/10/10 06:42 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Third Axis Max Hardcore Prison Bitch Registered: 02/02/10 Posts: 165 Loc: Golden State of mind	Quote: I've worked for two bearded guys named Andy in my recent carreer, and Andy Baird was the original inspiration for me to plan to live the last few decades of my life as an RV vagabond. This is the Emerald RV City at the end of the Yellow Brick Scenic Route: Attachments 475236-TennesseeApartmentComplex.jpg (7 downloads)
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#480673 - 03/10/10 06:54 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Anonymous Unregistered	Quote: This is the Emerald RV City at the end of the Yellow Brick Scenic Route: I thought that was Donny Long Studios? I'm crushed and disillusioned.
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#480674 - 03/10/10 07:22 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
LouCypher @ Porn Jesus Registered: 10/19/06 Posts: 9958 Loc: fortified	Quote: Quote: Quote: Why do you look so unsanitary and disheveled? Actually, he kind of looks like a bbq "chef." When I got a new grill a while back, people kept giving me bbq cookbooks as gifts. They would always have some older, disheveled guy on the cover standing next to a grill, holding a pair of tongs. And I do love to grill. Not enough to write a book, or make my own sauces or rubs or whatever. Off the shelf is Ok at my house. Disheveled with tongs, Barry The people that want you to grill are also the ones that hope your gas grill malfunctions and blows up in your face only they are too nice to say so. They not only hope your facial hair gets burnt off but the resulting smell and melted flesh will be an improvement over your every day aroma and appearance. That's how it's done Cuck.... _________________________ i just lock, load, and regret. - jamesn
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#480675 - 03/11/10 01:35 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Coke banned by Monkey Whoremaster Registered: 06/22/07 Posts: 2656 Loc: Polekatz, Rte 43	candidate #6: author Lucy Grealy Lucy lost her jaw to cancer. She became a nympho and allowed anyone and everyone (including street trash) to fuck her however they wished. As she poignantly related in her essays, this made her feel wanted and attractive. She may have literally allowed men to put a bag over her head while fucking her. She didn't care. And her lack of a jaw gave her a snake-like ability to swallow/deepthroat just about anything without gagging. She may have been hideous looking, but she knew how to get her kicks. Barry's company could never be enough. She'd never get past the fact that he's too fat to become erect. Attachments 475327-ll.jpg (12 downloads) _________________________ "You have been banned from making any new posts or sending private messages. The reason for this ban is: meh, cause i can"
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#480676 - 03/11/10 01:57 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Coke banned by Monkey Whoremaster Registered: 06/22/07 Posts: 2656 Loc: Polekatz, Rte 43	Quote: The people that want you to grill are also the ones that hope your gas grill malfunctions and blows up in your face only they are too nice to say so. They not only hope your facial hair gets burnt off but the resulting smell and melted flesh will be an improvement over your every day aroma and appearance. That's how it's done Cuck.... Save your lameness for NAMBLA meetings, Loserpher. We're not as easily amused as your pervert pals. _________________________ "You have been banned from making any new posts or sending private messages. The reason for this ban is: meh, cause i can"
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#480677 - 03/11/10 02:51 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
electrostatic Porn Jesus Registered: 08/16/08 Posts: 4257 Loc: Counting Kisses	^Is she Jewish? I was thinking "jawlessjewess" would be a super cute e-harmony screen name. _________________________ "Nature already created the perfect dishwasher....its called a woman." - Fiend
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#480678 - 03/11/10 09:41 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
XPT RIP AC Cream Wannabe Registered: 03/05/07 Posts: 529	hey barry. why do you feel the need to sign every post, "barry"? we know it's you ya old bastard.
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#480679 - 03/11/10 09:48 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Coke banned by Monkey Whoremaster Registered: 06/22/07 Posts: 2656 Loc: Polekatz, Rte 43	I need help here. I can't think of any other women ugly enough to be a potential match for Barry. _________________________ "You have been banned from making any new posts or sending private messages. The reason for this ban is: meh, cause i can"
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#480680 - 03/11/10 10:01 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Cum Stains Gay For Pay Registered: 01/26/06 Posts: 1058 Loc: Keen for Peen	You guys are forgetting this woman. Barry's ultimate dream girl. Attachments 475357-diana.jpg (7 downloads) _________________________ Even though Brian Pumper sometimes tries to act like he is hardcore thug-rapper, I can tell that underneath he is a considerate, respectful guy. -tritone
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#480681 - 03/11/10 10:15 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Steezo Porn Jesus Registered: 01/11/06 Posts: 5287 Loc: Anchorage, Alaska	Here's the first image that pops up if you search for "white trash bbq" in Google. Attachments 475360-07_white_trash_bbq_0018_r1.jpg (6 downloads) _________________________ "Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars." - Martin Luther King, Jr.
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#480682 - 03/11/10 11:06 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Coke banned by Monkey Whoremaster Registered: 06/22/07 Posts: 2656 Loc: Polekatz, Rte 43	You guys need to step up your game. It's true, those women are very ugly. But do you really think they'd date this guy: _________________________ "You have been banned from making any new posts or sending private messages. The reason for this ban is: meh, cause i can"
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#480683 - 03/11/10 03:12 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Jigaloo Porn Jesus Registered: 04/17/06 Posts: 7863	I wonder if Christian XXX would fuck King Kong here. _________________________
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#480684 - 03/11/10 03:48 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
LouCypher @ Porn Jesus Registered: 10/19/06 Posts: 9958 Loc: fortified	Quote: You guys need to step up your game. It's true, those women are very ugly. But do you really think they'd date this guy: He's a Pirate, she's a Goth. Vh1's next reality show. Attachments 475413-fat-ugly-goth.jpg (5 downloads) _________________________ i just lock, load, and regret. - jamesn
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#480685 - 03/11/10 03:56 PM Uglier posters than Barry
††† Pervert Registered: 11/01/09 Posts: 2141	*FA(S)T EDDIE* http://fasteddielovesporn.blogspot.com Attachments 475417-jenniferandme.jpg (10 downloads)
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#480686 - 03/11/10 11:11 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Barry the Pirate Porn Jesus Registered: 12/09/08 Posts: 8433 Loc: Great Pacific Northwest	Quote: hey barry. why do you feel the need to sign every post, "barry"? we know it's you ya old bastard. I dunno. Habit I guess. It's like writing a letter or signing off. Good night and good luck. _________________________ Having killed someone doesn't make you a killer- @KINGROCHE
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#480687 - 03/14/10 05:58 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
LouCypher @ Porn Jesus Registered: 10/19/06 Posts: 9958 Loc: fortified	Race back to the thread... Coke last visited on the 11'th. Berry was here the next day. Last one back is the first loser?. _________________________ i just lock, load, and regret. - jamesn
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#480688 - 03/15/10 12:21 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Barry the Pirate Porn Jesus Registered: 12/09/08 Posts: 8433 Loc: Great Pacific Northwest	Quote: Race back to the thread... Coke last visited on the 11'th. Berry was here the next day. Last one back is the first loser?. It's like winning Special Olympics. Some are just more Special than others. _________________________ Having killed someone doesn't make you a killer- @KINGROCHE
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#480689 - 03/17/10 11:32 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
irviral Rob Black's Crack Pipe Registered: 03/17/10 Posts: 66	Barry, fuck these retards, you look great
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#480690 - 03/17/10 11:47 AM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
gia jordan Porn Jesus Registered: 09/07/05 Posts: 14160 Loc: NYC	Yeah, but Barry told me some very nice things about himself. I feel like he's not letting his outside represent his inside, so that's why I'm getting him on 'What Not to Wear.' _________________________ "What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#480691 - 03/17/10 01:59 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
irviral Rob Black's Crack Pipe Registered: 03/17/10 Posts: 66	I assume that Barry rides a Harley
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#480692 - 03/17/10 10:11 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Coke banned by Monkey Whoremaster Registered: 06/22/07 Posts: 2656 Loc: Polekatz, Rte 43	Quote: I assume that Barry rides a Harley how often do you see a 400 lb tub of goo riding a motorcycle? morbidly obese people are lucky if they can move from bed to toilet. _________________________ "You have been banned from making any new posts or sending private messages. The reason for this ban is: meh, cause i can"
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#480693 - 03/17/10 10:26 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Coke banned by Monkey Whoremaster Registered: 06/22/07 Posts: 2656 Loc: Polekatz, Rte 43	Quote: Quote: You guys need to step up your game. It's true, those women are very ugly. But do you really think they'd date this guy: He's a Pirate, she's a Goth. Vh1's next reality show. Just look at the Louser trying to kiss my ass by showing enthusiam for the thread. His bitch-like appeal to Malice for protection didn't go anywhere ("Tony, Coke has crossed the line!"). Now he's playing the suck up so I'll take it easy on him. Pathetic. _________________________ "You have been banned from making any new posts or sending private messages. The reason for this ban is: meh, cause i can"
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#480694 - 03/17/10 10:30 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Anonymous Unregistered	Quote: how often do you see a 400 lb tub of goo riding a motorcycle? You really are nine years old, aren't you? EDIT: Yeah, you just answered my question: Quote: Just look at the Louser trying to kiss my ass by showing enthusiam for the thread. His bitch-like appeal to Malice for protection didn't go anywhere ("Tony, Coke has crossed the line!"). Now he's playing the suck up so I'll take it easy on him. Pathetic. Edited by J.B. (03/17/10 10:32 PM)
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#480695 - 03/17/10 10:47 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Coke banned by Monkey Whoremaster Registered: 06/22/07 Posts: 2656 Loc: Polekatz, Rte 43	Yeah, you're right. Porky is probably training for a marathon as we speak. He's a master at all things physical. _________________________ "You have been banned from making any new posts or sending private messages. The reason for this ban is: meh, cause i can"
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#480696 - 03/17/10 11:17 PM Re: Women ugly enough to be in Barry's league
Northrop Gay For Pay Registered: 01/13/07 Posts: 1011	Quote: Just look at the Louser trying to kiss my ass by showing enthusiam for the thread. His bitch-like appeal to Malice for protection didn't go anywhere ("Tony, Coke has crossed the line!"). Now he's playing the suck up so I'll take it easy on him. Pathetic. Now, Coke is an elitist who we all know loves the ass kissing. Remember when corn dog was actually sending him fan mail? Remember Coke's gentle smile while he bent over to position himself just so, to fully enjoy that tongue? But, this an interesting twist. Apparently, you cross Coke and even when you do start licking it, the man's got his principles. Lou, keep working the ass kissing. This is Coke's weakness. It will work, eventually.
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