I had this thought come accross me today and i feel that the only other people that know what i mean by this would be the straight female pornstars. It dawned on me that i have sucked a lot of cock to get where i am. At the time , it was what was needed in order to move up to where i wanted to be, well last week i reached the highest point in my career that i had ever hoped for (a non sexual industry in case you were wondering) then it hit me. None of it was earned, am i fraud in the sense that i have fooled myself and what i should be doing and what im passionate about?. I mean pornstar suck a lot of cock but at least thats what the job requires and what is needed in the job, but in my case, it was used to further myself when it is not only not required but frowned upon. Anyone with suggestions on either what i should do about it now that i have had time to reflect on my actions, or ways i can justify it to myself, like men who fuck other men while in jail but still view themselves as non homosexuals?. Confused monkey.

I wouldn't worry about it. Figuratively, we all such cock at one time or another.

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Figuratively, we all such cock at one time or another.

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Ohh if it was figuratively i wouldn't of worry about it, but im talking about literally. It was only 3 guys but it was on MORE then 3 occasions. One guy couldn't do the act without having princes diamond and pearls playing in the background, kinda of weird and kinky , is it wrong for me to like that?.