Conq's been drinking tonight I see!!

In all fairness to El Gordo Chulo, Ned, shooting with an SLR on a flat surface isn't usually a viable option. The lens outweighs the body in most instances, and therefore drags the fucker down. I have a battery pack on my body that helps, but it won't stay upright for anything larger than my 24-70mm. It takes more work than it's worth to throw something under it to balance out the frame of view.

So yeah, I'm guessing he has no one to take a picture of his lard ass as conclusion to this mystery.