I dont have any of these bullshit stories about breakups and all that crap. The few non whore legit relationships I had I was GLAD to be rid of the bitches, they sucked the life out of my.....er, LIFE.

Most fucked up embarrassing moment probably was when i inadvertently scheduled 2 awesome HOTT HOTT HOTT whores at the same time...that was an awkward moment. Whore #1 already had my dick in her mouth when whore number 2 showed up with some prime veal cutlets she wanted me to cook for our din din.

I recovered fast....I paid for my mistake and covered botht their rates, and cooked the veal cutlets. Problem was by the time dinner was ready, whore #1 (the early one) who was a pillhead was zonked out in my bed. So we had wayyyy too much food which whore #2 wound up taking home to her roommate, a lesbian hooker with a bullring thru her nose.

I seldom eat veal, like, ever as a result of this whole debacle. Oh, and the pillwhore puked on my pillow, too much vino with the xanax.

Not all whore stories are tales of the naked city.