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#448880 - 09/11/09 05:06 AM
Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/04
Posts: 8662
Loc: In a k1ng like state of medioc...
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I have come to the harsh realiz(s)ation that I am no longer the one thing that the smelly monkey persona was based around, I (monkey) is no longer cynical. It isn't by choice more so a natural progression when there is nothing to complain about. Its a shame, I enjoyed that part of my personality (in reality and in the online world as a porn forum troll with the heart of stone).
I would like to retire the cynical version of the smelly monkey today even then its very clear its been gone for some time now, so we can at least mark the pre and post eras of the average and currently painfully average versions of smelly monkey.
Now time for some toothless random thoughts
I enjoy forex trading
I anger myself for not being pretend disgusted with anything stevie wonder did in the 80s
I wonder what its like to be brianna banks for one day, she strikes me as very introspective.
How does James Woods have an estate worth north of $60 million? Can you name more than 3 james woods movies and were any massive hits?
I have been thinking where is my cut off point for the ugliest celebrity id fuck and I still can't come up with a clear one. I think Anjelica Huston but im sure there is a few worse I probably would, and truth be told there is something appealing about her, I can't put my finger on it, I mean she kept jack for years before she left him, has to be something there
Ugliest pornstar is an easy one, janet jacme BUTTTTTTT a a janet jacme free of the nastiests, just based on looks.
Thats all I got, until next time, monkey
_________________________
“Jesus said, hey baby, its all good" Wayne Lewis
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#448881 - 09/11/09 05:30 AM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Registered Sex Offender
Registered: 07/09/06
Posts: 2362
Loc: St. Louis
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By introspective, do you mean she likes to look down her own asshole as it is gaping?
James Woods is at the top of the character actor profession. He hasn't been a leading man in a couple of decades, but he's everywhere. I'm not at all surprised he has that kind of jack. He could be an astute investor, as well. He did attend MIT, dropping out shortly before graduation to pursue an acting career, so he's obviously a pretty smart guy.
Diminished cynicism will make you less amusing. Hopefully it will make you not less interesting.
_________________________
"Offer them what they secretly want and they of course immediately become panic-stricken."
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#448882 - 09/11/09 05:45 AM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/04
Posts: 8662
Loc: In a k1ng like state of medioc...
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Quote:
By introspective, do you mean she likes to look down her own asshole as it is gaping?
James Woods is at the top of the character actor profession. He hasn't been a leading man in a couple of decades, but he's everywhere. I'm not at all surprised he has that kind of jack. He could be an astute investor, as well. He did attend MIT, dropping out shortly before graduation to pursue an acting career, so he's obviously a pretty smart guy.
Diminished cynicism will make you less amusing. Hopefully it will make you not less interesting.
Ill address the top point first then the 3rd point and will conclude with the second.
Briana got into porn to get money to live for her and her sister who she was forced to raise since her parents have the same mental capacity as mary carey's. She attacked her responsibilities irresponsibly, and for those who have scene any of her early work her hurt shows through in most of the degrading work she fell into, add on the relationship with bobby vitale with drug problems and you have one damaged young girl raising and even younger girl, theres a story to be told there, im sure.
I wouldnt say I was ever interesting, I was more the punchline and rim shot for whatever the porn industry joke was at any one time.
I love James Woods, don't get me wrong but 60 million? I also know he is book smart but there were stories of horrible ability to save money, he lives out of 5 star hotels for the better part of 20 years before finally buying his own place a few years ago, he once left a car on the side of the road because it ran out of gas only to walk into the dealership across the street to buy a new car. He also isnt in the blockbuster movies that great actors get their bank on, he hasnt done the comic book, will smith, 90's tom cruise type movies and he only did ONE sly stallone one. I mean come on 60 million? Im sure he has been married a few times too, something doesnt add up.
_________________________
“Jesus said, hey baby, its all good" Wayne Lewis
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#448883 - 09/11/09 09:03 AM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Porn Icon
Registered: 01/27/06
Posts: 3440
Loc: Jaundice Town
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james woods is like insanely intelligent. dropped out of MIT to pursue acting. Also he is an ace poker player
Woods plays on the World Poker Tour in the Hollywood Home games for the American Stroke Association charity. In 2006, James finished in 24th place out of 692 at the L.A. Poker Classic for $40,000.
he likely deals cocaine as well
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#448885 - 09/11/09 01:56 PM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Pervert
Registered: 10/02/08
Posts: 2058
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i heard james woods is ridiculously intelligent. when i say "ridiculously", i'm not kidding. he dropped out of MIT just before graduating, to pursue acting.
notable quotes in celebration of cynicism day:
"you know how women get when they get old. that's why when you go to the pound, you get a puppy." --james woods on dating
"because that’s what truth is. pain. that’s the way we’re all going to end up, alone and bloated and washed up on a beach and no one will care." --holly randall on luke ford
"anyone can be a winner on a desert island. a true winner takes from others, and forces them to accept their status as losers relative to him or her." --james woods
"i drink flavored vodka. but really, I taste my own darkness." --gia jordan
"each day literally thousands of people do something of which they are ashamed. the work was easy, i had winters off, and nobody minded if i showed up under the influence. as long as I remembered my lines, i lived like a rock star." --james woods
"watching someone's face collapse in grief again and again and again, it just does something to the human heart. of course a lot of people claim to be animals but have no follow-through when it’s time to prove it." --loucypher
"i ended up getting a great deal on the boat. it took major cleanup though, it was the scene of a quadruple-homicide. i think a drug deal gone bad." --jamesn
"i'm so awesome i want to make slow, sweet, passionate love to the entire cast and crew every time i step onto a set." --james woods
"oh, you’re tired, is that it? yeah, you’re tired. this is you: 'oh, i’m tired.' hard work. feel sorry for me. i’m a spoiled, lazy, nothing cunt who thinks just because i'm one of the most famous names in the biz, i don't have to go out there and give it a hundred and ten per cent every single day.” --steven hirsch on briana banks
"can a hideous creature designed only for killing discover the beauty in himself through the love of a troubled soul designed only for compassion?" --bishop on marley mason
"i'm like a memory foam mattress - i learn - shaping myself to your body's specific needs." --steven koch
"there’s always a quick way to tell when i'm getting tired of you. maybe it’s gentle references to the time. maybe it’s a few fake yawns." --james woods
"you can never be too many people." --smelly monkey
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#448887 - 09/11/09 08:41 PM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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I don't like flavored vodka, I like it plain. And straight up.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#448888 - 09/11/09 10:51 PM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/04
Posts: 8662
Loc: In a k1ng like state of medioc...
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Quote:
james woods is like insanely intelligent. dropped out of MIT to pursue acting. Also he is an ace poker player
Woods plays on the World Poker Tour in the Hollywood Home games for the American Stroke Association charity. In 2006, James finished in 24th place out of 692 at the L.A. Poker Classic for $40,000.
he likely deals cocaine as well
If you watch one poker event on tv you'd know there is no such thing as an ace poker player, they are all monkeys with gambling problems
Quote:
i heard james woods is ridiculously intelligent. when i say "ridiculously", i'm not kidding. he dropped out of MIT just before graduating, to pursue acting.
I think that kinda proves my point, he might be book smart but in terms of common sense he can't be far off taryn thomas.
Quote:
"oh, you’re tired, is that it? yeah, you’re tired. this is you: 'oh, i’m tired.' hard work. feel sorry for me. i’m a spoiled, lazy, nothing cunt who thinks just because i'm one of the most famous names in the biz, i don't have to go out there and give it a hundred and ten per cent every single day.” --steven hirsch on briana banks
(me)  (Maxwell Hardcore')
(that quote)
Quote:
Hey Pops, what is happening?
Don't sell yourself short. I believe you are growing as a person and that growth can serve you if you adjust your strengths accordingly
If I sell myself short it won't be the worst small quality (feature) about me , (fights the urge to call larry)
Quote:
I don't like flavored vodka, I like it plain. And straight up.
Hey Gia, do you want me to nut all over your grill? (holy shit we have lost the cumming smiley)
_________________________
“Jesus said, hey baby, its all good" Wayne Lewis
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#448889 - 09/11/09 10:56 PM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/16/08
Posts: 4257
Loc: Counting Kisses
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And between you and me, something amazing happened... and now I can talk to animals. It's really cool, but totally secret. That said, I was going to ask that you,(Monekyy) show us a pic of the whore who turned you in to a pussy, but something in Mark_J's ramble-on-about made me think that it can be found somewhere in Website Talk. Don't call me, I'll call you.
XoXo,
k1ng
_________________________
"Nature already created the perfect dishwasher....its called a woman." - Fiend
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#448890 - 09/11/09 11:01 PM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/04
Posts: 8662
Loc: In a k1ng like state of medioc...
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Quote:
And between you and me, something amazing happened... and now I can talk to animals. It's really cool, but totally secret. That said, I was going to ask that you,(Monekyy) show us a pic of the whore who turned you in to a pussy, but something in Mark_J's ramble-on-about made me think that it can be found somewhere in Website Talk. Don't call me, I'll call you.
XoXo,
k1ng
I'll give you a hint, she just had a birthday and is the inspiration for my beard, that reminds me, what do you think of my beard?
_________________________
“Jesus said, hey baby, its all good" Wayne Lewis
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#448892 - 09/11/09 11:20 PM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 10321
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Quote:
PS. What do you think the girl who turned k1ng in to a pussy looks like?
Do you really think you "turned k1ng into a pussy"?
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#448894 - 09/11/09 11:28 PM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 10321
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Quote:
You really think k1ng is a pussy? 
No. I don't.
But I bet you think this song is about you.
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#448896 - 09/11/09 11:42 PM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 10321
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Yeah sister you really zinged me with that. A link to an old xpt thread and your trademark "fag" gif. Wake up girl. Or nod off permanently. Either way would be an improvement.
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#448897 - 09/12/09 12:43 AM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Pervert
Registered: 10/02/08
Posts: 2058
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Quote:
PS. What do you think the girl who turned k1ng in to a pussy looks like?
come on. you're prettier than that. and high heels. i like high heels.
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#448899 - 09/12/09 01:01 AM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/16/08
Posts: 4257
Loc: Counting Kisses
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@ Mark.
You know what? I don't know how to walk in high heels, not kidding. I'm still very much a child. I often forget.  I need to stop being a little girl and finally grow up and be a woman. One day. Maybe.
PS. I always thought Jean was very hideous and somewhat ignorant, some would say it was more like innocence, but it could be stupidity as well. 
_________________________
"Nature already created the perfect dishwasher....its called a woman." - Fiend
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#448903 - 09/13/09 04:44 AM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/04
Posts: 8662
Loc: In a k1ng like state of medioc...
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Quote:
Quote:
I'll give you a hint, she just had a birthday and is the inspiration for my beard, that reminds me, what do you think of my beard?
Are your thoughts worthy of you? If not - NOW is the time to change them. You can begin right were you are right now. Nothing matters but this moment and what you are focusing your attention on.
PS. What do you think the girl who turned k1ng in to a pussy looks like?
I do believe I am worthy of my current thoughts, I believe as forum posters we are must remain above the perez line (like the mendoza line in baseball), I mean the day I start photoshopping fake jizz on pornstars, people I dislike is the day I know the smelly monkey persona has died, right now im just lacking my cynical side. Bear with me people, im only at step 6.
Quote:
PS. What do you think the girl who turned k1ng in to a pussy looks like?
easy it can be broken down into different eras
1980's
1990's
2000's
Quote:
Yeah sister you really zinged me with that. A link to an old xpt thread and your trademark "fag" gif. Wake up girl. Or nod off permanently. Either way would be an improvement.
Is it just me or does it seem like bornyo has just reached the hour and 10 mark of his rocky iv phase where he has completed his old school russian training and is now ready to face what appears(ed) to be the indestructible force of Ivan Drago played by electro, two guesses for who played the role of apollo creed in what could've been called carl weathers tour de force had it not of been for his later role in the movie predator.
_________________________
“Jesus said, hey baby, its all good" Wayne Lewis
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#448904 - 09/13/09 11:58 AM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 05/06/05
Posts: 1946
Loc: Outer Space
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I liked James Woods best in Family Guy.
_________________________
I really try to retain a respectful distance from my models, even when I'm lubing up their pussies.
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#448905 - 09/13/09 11:22 PM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 03/22/06
Posts: 6557
Loc: 2004 - the glory days
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#448907 - 09/16/09 03:35 PM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 03/29/08
Posts: 1991
Loc: colorado
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what is forex?
_________________________
"Should send her our way, XPT could REALLY get her warmed up for any kind of abuse she might get later. "- nugent
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#448910 - 09/16/09 11:20 PM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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AC Cream Wannabe
Registered: 10/04/06
Posts: 522
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Quote:
what is forex?
Wrong. It's called forcedsex and it's the inevitable result of saying "hello" to eric in public.
_________________________
Gigi, it's like you're putting a rainbow in all of our hearts...  - faggypatty
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#448911 - 09/17/09 01:35 PM
Re: Smelly Monkey: The Day Cynicism Died
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 4470
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Yup, welcome back pimpleclit. 
_________________________
Because you already yelled 'dropping prices!!!' after Red Light canned you. - Gia Jordan to Brandon Iron
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Some people never grow and their stagnant personalities are not appealing at all.Acceptance is key. I am nowhere near as angry or self-centered as I used to be and there is no doubt that it makes me a better parent which is the most important job I will ever do. 
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