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Quote:

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Why in God's name would you enjoy watching me with the Minion?

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there are many misconceptions about the minion- people tend to approach him with a mix of fascination and disgust. he is, in fact, one of our finest character actors. we hear talk of benicio del toro gaining sixty pounds for fear and loathing- yet the minion gained thrice the amount for his role as offbeat porn stud. nobody puts their body through that kind of abuse without a serious commitment to excellence.

the ability lock his facial muscles into an unreadable mask of happiness behind the sad, the ability to premature discharge without any erection at all- he may seem awkward but he's never struggled with who to be. he's known for his ability to both captivate and inspire his onscreen partners, and nothing pleases him more than watching their eyes roll back in bliss- their nostrils full and open to his spice, often losing consciousness momentarily as they drift off into technicolor.

the minion is universal, unwavering, once-in-a-lifetime. the extra spring in your step on the way to picking up plan B. you don't let this opportunity pass you by. take a look at these photos- why are these women smiling? because you can't fake ecstasy.

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