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#445358 - 08/27/09 04:18 PM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/30/08
Posts: 7602
Loc: a site known for its tolerance...
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Butterface. Where in our great land is she from?
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"I'll never forget the moment during the lovely Alyssa Allure's scene in 'American Bukkake' where the fellow got out of his wheel chair to ejaculate on her face. It was grotesque but had a certain frisson." -Sock
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#445360 - 08/27/09 07:53 PM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Registered Sex Offender
Registered: 12/16/08
Posts: 2401
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Well judging from pic 3, he did her doggie style so he got the better view.
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"Guage once told me that there is nothing worse than eaten ass of a black dude thats been huffen drain cleaner the night befor." - delanoojos
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#445361 - 08/28/09 01:39 AM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Kurt Lackwood's Fluffer
Registered: 05/22/08
Posts: 1272
Loc: In a cesspool of phonies and d...
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She looks like Radar from M*A*S*H.
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Jeff Jordan: "Common man from LA"
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#445366 - 08/29/09 11:29 AM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 4726
Loc: The City That Never Sleeps, Tr...
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Quote:
Absolutely perfect, good find and resemblance is uncanny. 
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#445367 - 08/29/09 10:00 PM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Bukkake Boy
Registered: 04/15/08
Posts: 741
Loc: The Great White Frozen Fucking...
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Fucking hell, I hope she took the money Brandon gave her and bought a chin...
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'She looks like Brock Lesnar.' - The Tatty Patty.
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#445368 - 08/31/09 01:12 PM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Internet Tough Guy
Registered: 05/18/09
Posts: 890
Loc: Midwest / Florida
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She is a little on the fat side, and her tits are too big, but those are some nice puffys she has going on there. Must have been cold during that shoot.But shes not as ugly as that Tia "I got hit in the face with a skillet" girl.
Plus she is white, so you have to give her points.
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I want to Bust a nut in that bitches right eye
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#445370 - 08/31/09 03:22 PM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Human Garbage
Registered: 04/02/09
Posts: 1541
Loc: Mississippi
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Quote:
"Her tits are too big..." BWAHHHHHAAAAAAHHHHAAAAAA!!
You guys are really, really, really out of touch. Let me guess. You are best on your block at Halo and will be first in line for the first showing of GAMER.
Next, her pussy will be too pink and her hair too long.
Good grief.
I would sell my soul to Satan to be able to be the slightest bit attracted to this hideous monster. I don't get an ego boost out of not being attracted to somebody, and I don't think I'm better than her. I think it is an absolute curse that has caused a great deal of pain in my life to only be able to be attracted to good looking women.
I not only couldn't get wood by a girl like that, if I already had wood when she walked in the room, I would loose it as soon as I saw her. This is not by choice, this is just the way it is.
I do wonder about guys who can have sex with any woman no matter what she looks like.
For example, how can somebody really claim to be musician when they are just as happy to listen to a retarded 4 year old banging on pots and pans with a wooden spoon as listening to Mozart? You wouldn't think that they are a true connoisseur of music, would you? Wouldn't you think that they really have no true interest in music at all?
_________________________
--Some of us look for The Way in opium and some in God, some of us in whiskey and some in love. It is all the same Way and it leads nowhither.
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#445374 - 08/31/09 07:38 PM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 09/19/05
Posts: 3576
Loc: Baltimore, MD
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Methinks that Brandon actually likes women. Is that allowed here?
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#445378 - 08/31/09 08:37 PM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Human Garbage
Registered: 04/02/09
Posts: 1541
Loc: Mississippi
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I hope you're not dragging me into those assumptions because I think you miss my point if you are.
It is a real, true fascination I have for guys who can do chicks like her, NOT SARCASM.
Yeah, I find her hideous. No, I could never, ever have sex with her. However, it is true that I am not proud of that, and honestly wish I wasn't that way. I don't think I'm better than her, but just wanting to be attracted to a chick isn't enough. Because of that, I'm fascinated by guys who can fuck ugly chicks. It just boggles my mind and I am a bit jealous.
_________________________
--Some of us look for The Way in opium and some in God, some of us in whiskey and some in love. It is all the same Way and it leads nowhither.
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#445379 - 08/31/09 08:57 PM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
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Pipe Dream: I'm a huge fan of Belladonna and Tory Lane. They each have their own thing going for them. It's real for them and it translates as real for me, too. I love those women. Let's be honest about how many other performers are out there, though, and who can compare to them. Few. Very few.
Production is often about rolling the dice with someone you are meeting for the first time and seeing what can happen. It's awkward, messy, and there is a little smegma involved. Don't ask me why. There just is.
Occasionally, however, you are firing on all cylinders and so is the deer in the headlights. She doesn't care about the camera or the size of the check. She's as eager to go out of the gate as you are. That's cool. That's unrehearsed. That's porno.
E.Y., keep the KY. You'll need it. Your standards are way too high or you are just a young buck. It has to be one or the other. Didn't you hear the speech in Chasing Amy about the sweet not tasting as sweet without the sour? Of course not. You were watching Fashion TV begging for Naomi Campbell to look in the camera while your pants were around your ankles.
Gimme Chloe and her round ass with a Silvera-salivating pinprick asshole anyday. Gimme Tanner Mayes acting like a wild ass and being a fun, young toy.
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#445388 - 09/01/09 09:38 AM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Human Garbage
Registered: 04/02/09
Posts: 1541
Loc: Mississippi
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Quote:
Joey likes what he likes!
Now, perhaps I have not made myself clear. Allow me to demonstrate. Go to your fridge. Take out a pound of butter. Put your hand on the butter. THAT is what Chloe's left ass cheek feels like. Notice how one globe-shaped cheek ying-yangs with the other, united only by the all-seeing brown eye and thin, yet resilient taint. It's beautiful, really. Go ahead. Stare into the abyss. Just don't get lost in it, you supermodel-cravers. Keep passing up the Angus burgers hoping to put your knife into a bacon-wrapped filet mignon. You can't afford it. You don't have reservations...but DAMN! it smells so good walking by that fancy restaurant. Better not eat that hamburger....at least I'm not fat.....I should go buy a belt though. I mean, these pants are falling off of me because I haven't eaten much. Yep...gonna wait for that filet mignon...and a porterhouse. I can finish both cuz I'm so damn hungry.
So you didn't like my music analogy and decided to use the food analogy instead, OK.
YOU are not just a consumer of the porn/food. YOU are a producer of the porn/food. I am the hungry consumer to whom you are selling your product. I ask you, the chef, to create a meal that is better than something I could have gotten for myself out of a dumpster. Your response is, "eat some of my shit so that when you find some fine dining provided by somebody else you will appreciate it more."
You know what? You are right, you crafty devil. People will rather eat bad food than starve to death, you win! Aren't you proud that you can serve shit and people will pay for it?
So back to my original music based question:
If you met a cook who was just as happy to eat a cockroach encrusted rancid fast food soy-burger as a perfectly prepared filet mignon, would you say that they really loved food, or would you say that they really didn't care much about food at all?
_________________________
--Some of us look for The Way in opium and some in God, some of us in whiskey and some in love. It is all the same Way and it leads nowhither.
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#445390 - 09/01/09 10:25 AM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/09/06
Posts: 9113
Loc: red dirt state of mind
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Surely girls with an IQ of 50 can't legally give consent.
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#445391 - 09/01/09 12:37 PM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Internet Tough Guy
Registered: 05/18/09
Posts: 890
Loc: Midwest / Florida
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Quote:
Your chubby-chasing idea was taken under advisement but rejected. I may not be the best talent-picker (or the thinnest) but it's tough to take advice from guys like you and Delanjoos, he of the now-famous "her tits are too big" criticism. You make as much sense as a grimacing, wincing Gokkun girl saying "I love cum!" as she involuntarily wretches.
Seriously, where are the guys who just enjoy seeing a fresh face every once in a while? Rodney Moore built an empire off of this type of talent.
Brandon,
Slow down there cowboy. There is no bigger fan of your work than I. I just happen to like the Tanner Mays type of body, thats all. Most of my "tittys too big are made in jest" I do like the fact that she looks like the girls at the mall.And, I would hit that much sooner than the whoes with hugh bolt ons that moan on cue.
I loved what Tanner did on video, the meltdown was fansastic, reminded me of high school, and the girls going off on each other.Did we not all experience a drunk bicth going off on us at some point in high school. It's just that none of our high school girls were sucking dick on film (back then it was film so fuck you very much video tape was not even invented then).
If these girls are good enough for you and Joey, then they are more than good enough for me, I just like little tittys thats all.
No one in the biz has better jizz placement than you do. I have never ever seen you miss the mark, maybe a little over shoot sometimes, but 99.9% of the time your right on target.
We all should be as lucky as you Brandon, no realy I mean that, really.
_________________________
I want to Bust a nut in that bitches right eye
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#445392 - 09/07/09 05:40 AM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Pervert
Registered: 07/05/05
Posts: 2134
Loc: Los Angeles, CA
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Quote:
I regret not starting porn at 15 and being the male version of Traci Lords.
you and me both, and for the record i would fuck chloe canuck in a heartbeat.
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#445394 - 09/09/09 03:03 PM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
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Quote:
If you met a cook who was just as happy to eat a cockroach encrusted rancid fast food soy-burger as a perfectly prepared filet mignon, would you say that they really loved food, or would you say that they really didn't care much about food at all?
All my fillies are filets. Every single one.
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#445395 - 09/09/09 03:05 PM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
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Quote:
Quote:
I regret not starting porn at 15 and being the male version of Traci Lords.
you and me both, and for the record i would fuck chloe canuck in a heartbeat.
Christian's endorsement means more than anything anyone else says. Debate over. The reviews of Chloe are glowy.
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#445397 - 09/09/09 04:15 PM
Re: Chloe Canuck does SHE IS HALF MY AGE
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Demodded Diseased Dwarf
Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/18/03
Posts: 9174
Loc: Penalty Box
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Your opinion is duly noted.
I'm standing by Christian. Not in front of him...by him. There's a big difference and I'm an extremely vulnerable 5'6". You learn from your mistakes...
One thing that is definitely not a mistake is TOESES LIKE ROSES, coming soon from JM Productions. Word on the street is that Mark Kulkis is bribing JM Productions to buy me out of my $1,000,000 contract.
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