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This is for Rear Admiral and whoever else has claimed to be a lawyer on this board.

Are you willing to take a quick quiz on well known cases to prove that you are a lawyer? The questions will be very easy for any lawyer to answer, but you'd have to answer fast so we know you're not researching.


I am more than qualified to administer this quiz. I promise there will be no tricks or attempts by me to fuck you up. I'm genuinely curious about whether or not you are really lawyers.

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I'm game, but you have to recognize that although all the initial training is the same, once we enter practice the specialties that develop are all over the board. I'm a corporate lawyer, working in M&A, early-stage venture investment (all but dead these days), a little bit of funds work and real estate. I know fuck-all about criminal law and Constitutional law -- the last time I cracked a book in those fields was 15 years ago.

It's like asking a heart surgeon about your prostate, or a dentist about your psychiatric problem. Sure, you'll get an informed-sounding answer based on medical training, and it would probably be fine. But it could just as easily be all wrong because the dentist isn't really on top of the latest developments in psychiatric care.

And besides, who in his right mind would want to masquerade as a workaday attorney? In my pretend life, I'm a hedge-fund manager who got out with a fist full of fuck-you money. Me and Skip Gates are yukkin' it up out at the Vineyard.

PS, smart guy: Lawyers always do research before answering a question, even one as prosaic as Is it raining? Research is what we do. It's the snap answer, tossed off without research, that gets you sued for malpractice.

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Pass.

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I'm game, but you have to recognize that although all the initial training is the same, once we enter practice the specialties that develop are all over the board. I'm a corporate lawyer, working in M&A, early-stage venture investment (all but dead these days), a little bit of funds work and real estate. I know fuck-all about criminal law and Constitutional law -- the last time I cracked a book in those fields was 15 years ago.

It's like asking a heart surgeon about your prostate, or a dentist about your psychiatric problem. Sure, you'll get an informed-sounding answer based on medical training, and it would probably be fine. But it could just as easily be all wrong because the dentist isn't really on top of the latest developments in psychiatric care.

And besides, who in his right mind would want to masquerade as a workaday attorney? In my pretend life, I'm a hedge-fund manager who got out with a fist full of fuck-you money. Me and Skip Gates are yukkin' it up out at the Vineyard.

PS, smart guy: Lawyers always do research before answering a question, even one as prosaic as Is it raining? Research is what we do. It's the snap answer, tossed off without research, that gets you sued for malpractice.

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Pass.

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I will let my attorney take the quiz for me.....

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Rear Admiral is full of it. Most lawyers I know work 60+ hours a week. Like they have time to waste on a fucking porn forum.

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It was actually about 45 minutes. For example I had to read the original Scott decision because I couldn't remember Taney's reasoning. There is one passing reference to this constitutional provision but he does not really build his argument around this provision. So no, this decision does not stand for the proposition Coke might claim it does.

And yes, I, also did not remember Lemon.

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Do you believe the Constitution is "a living breathing document" which evolves however liberals wish it to evolve? ("trees have rights!") Or do you belive it means what it actually says and the original intent does not change?

Would you agree that agree that Griswald was ridiculous and all the shit that followed it (including Roe) should be left to individual states? Moreover, do you think William O. Douglas was a leftist anti-Constitutional power grabber who should have been removed and imprisoned?

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This thread would be more effective if it was to determine who is the most fake lawyer here instead of determining who is an actual lawyer.

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Since this has gone all day, and no one has said it yet, I feel the need to get this one out of the way.

I'm not a lawyer but I play one on the Interwebs.

Carry on with your fuckery. Smoke em if you got em..

HELP ME HELP DESI AND ELLIE!!
Barry

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Anyway, I thought the recent APB on me by Gia was prompted by absence, such as the kind one would encounter when a guy is working 60 hours a week.

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What a half-assed attempt to provide an excuse, more likely you had to take the wife and kids to Disneyland for the summer. He also slips in a delusional claim that he wants to one day run for office, while also claiming to frequent whores, the fantasy is in full bloom. Since his return the admiral has still proven incapable of posting in a thread without mentioning his supposed 'job.'

I retract my theory that the admiral lives in his mother's basement. More likely he is your average overweight, balding, middle-aged man stuck in a middle management office job with a poor, haggard wife who he fucks once a month.

Good to see that Coke, an imaginary graduate with multiple degrees and a mysterious source of wealth, back up an imaginary lawyer.

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More likely he is your average overweight, balding, middle-aged man stuck in a middle management office job with a poor, haggard wife who he fucks once a month.

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Maybe now it can be time for the fake masters degree challenge.

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Maybe now it can be time for the fake masters degree challenge.

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I was thinking more on the lines of......The Fake Doctor Challenge.

1) question would be what is the hippocratic oath??

2) I bought the operation game from milton bradley...Can I remove his spleen and hit on my hot new medical assistant all in one move without being charged with malpractice.

3) I just got my brand new percription pads in with my DEA # on them....should I make up some names...Conrad Murray style and start writing away....xanax, oxycontin, demerol, dilaudid, roxycontin and soma.

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Here is the exam that Rear Admiral passed:



1) What case established a "right to privacy"?


2) What early case established "judical review" or the right of the court to interpret how the constitution applies in various situations?


3) What famous "test" involving goverment and religion has 3 parts or 3 spokes?


4) By what measure can something be obscene?


5) In what case did the court rule that certain people could be rounded up and detained as the government deems necessary?


6) What phrase appears in many cases where a justice is saying that precedents from prior decisions must be followed?


7) In what old case (now overturned) did the court assign a fractional value to the humanity of certain individuals?


8) Complete this phrase - "emanations from _______________"


9) What early case established (basically) that the federal government power trumps state government power?


10) What two word term in the 14th amendment has been used to justify the existence of certain rights not explicitly mentioned in the Constitution?

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1) Griswold v. Connecticut.

2) Marbury v. Madison then Martin v. Hunter's Lesee addressed the Supreme Court's right to review the constitutionality of State Court Decisions.

3. There is a three part test in Lemon v. Kurtzman regarding whether a government action violates the establishment clause in regards to promoting or preferring a particular religion.

4. Contemporary community standards, see Miller v. California.

5. Probably Korematsu v. U.S., which was based on an racial classification which passed a strict scutiny test because of an alleged compelling need. I would not be shocked if their were similar cases regarding the treatment of our native American population from the 1800s.

6. Stare decisis, if we are talking about a decision in a particular legal case which is not overturned on appeal the term would be res judicada if the issue involved the same parties.

7. The language is actually in Article One, Section Two, of the original constitution which refers to "three fifths of other persons". To my knowledge this method of counting population was not substantially challenged in a Supreme Court Case before the civil war.

8. No clue.

9. Probably McCulloch v. Maryland, which allowed the federal government to use the doctrine of implied powers to expand their decision making powers at the expense of the states.

10. What two word term in the 14th amendment has been used to justify the existence of certain rights not explicitly mentioned in the Constitution?

Answer. Due process. Often referred to as substantive due process.

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Anyway, why all the hate, brother? It's not my fault you're broke.

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Anyone of you fake lawyers ever reported a "DMCA copyright infringement violation" to a tube?

I tested it with two videos yesterday on slut.load - both are down now. Does this work for you too?

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Quit frontin.

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I'm just trying to save kids, Dogherty. Show some style please.

I'm right and writing another one now.