I'm game, but you have to recognize that although all the initial training is the same, once we enter practice the specialties that develop are all over the board. I'm a corporate lawyer, working in M&A, early-stage venture investment (all but dead these days), a little bit of funds work and real estate. I know fuck-all about criminal law and Constitutional law -- the last time I cracked a book in those fields was 15 years ago.

It's like asking a heart surgeon about your prostate, or a dentist about your psychiatric problem. Sure, you'll get an informed-sounding answer based on medical training, and it would probably be fine. But it could just as easily be all wrong because the dentist isn't really on top of the latest developments in psychiatric care.

And besides, who in his right mind would want to masquerade as a workaday attorney? In my pretend life, I'm a hedge-fund manager who got out with a fist full of fuck-you money. Me and Skip Gates are yukkin' it up out at the Vineyard.

PS, smart guy: Lawyers always do research before answering a question, even one as prosaic as Is it raining? Research is what we do. It's the snap answer, tossed off without research, that gets you sued for malpractice.