A guy goes into a pub with an Emu and a cat. He says, "Two pints of lager..." He says to the cat, "What do you want?" The cat says, "I'm not payin' for it." He says, "I'm not asking you to pay for it. I'm gonna get it. What do you want?" The cat says, "I'm not payin' for it." He says, "It's all right. I'm going to buy it. What do you want?" Cat says, "Pint o' lager, but I'm not payin' for it." (To the bartender) "Three pints of lager."
They drink that. He gets back up and says, "So, is that gonna be the same again?" The cat goes, "I'm not payin' for it." He says, "I'm buying the drinks!" "I'm not payin' for it!" This goes on. Four times it happens. Then the barman says, "What is this? What're you doing with an Emu and a cat?"
He says, "Long story... Anyway, I get these three wishes. I met a genie, he gave me three wishes. I said, 'You see the big house in the hills? I'd love that. I've always looked at it and I'd love to have that.' The genie PSSHHHH... He's sittin' in the house, servants all around. He says, 'Next, I better have money to make sure I keep the house... Um... 10 million dollars.' PSHHHH Bankbook... $10 million."
The barman says, "But this isn't..." He says, "Yeah, yeah... Third wish. 'I want a big tall bird with long legs and a wee tight pussy!'"