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#434020 - 10/06/09 04:32 PM Re: Panzer Shit
the unknown pervert Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 03/22/07
Posts: 5186
Loc: Joshua Tree National Park
Premiering next year on The Travel Channel, Man vs Artificial Ingredients.
_________________________
I would eat Allie Sin's asshole until I got an emotion out of her.-Jerkules

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#434021 - 10/07/09 09:31 AM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221


Attachments
443844-AngelWings.jpg (6 downloads)


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#434022 - 10/10/09 08:41 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
Blazin' Wings, I ate them all:



Attachments
444373-BlazinWings.jpg (5 downloads)


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#434023 - 10/10/09 10:48 PM Re: Panzer Shit
*L*G* Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 06/05/05
Posts: 4468
Loc: Great America
alex do you eat hairy anuses too?

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#434024 - 10/13/09 04:03 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
A portion of Big Al's Baked Ziti:



Attachments
444811-BakedZiti-2.jpg (6 downloads)


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#434025 - 10/14/09 01:17 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
Pizza from Pathmark. At first I wanted to say "What a Deal!!!" but then when I baked it it was just okay. The peppe slices and cheese are okay but the dough/crust is plain and average:



Attachments
444946-Pathmark-Pizza.jpg (5 downloads)


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#434026 - 10/14/09 05:25 PM Re: Panzer Shit
RenfieldGyps Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 4726
Loc: The City That Never Sleeps, Tr...
But it's Italian, how can you go wrong.

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#434027 - 10/14/09 06:11 PM Re: Panzer Shit
backdoorman Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 09/01/08
Posts: 9782
Loc: Hillbilly Holler
_________________________
I may not know arse but I know what I like !

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#434028 - 10/14/09 08:16 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
Quote:

But it's Italian, how can you go wrong.



I think that the granny that is on the label has a down's syndrom.

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#434029 - 10/14/09 08:24 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
Quote:

Here you go Panzer. Italian bowels with sauce !



What?! No sauteed liver!!! That stuff is not cheap by the way.

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#434030 - 10/15/09 09:42 AM Re: Panzer Shit
RenfieldGyps Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 12/28/05
Posts: 4726
Loc: The City That Never Sleeps, Tr...
Tripe, liver and any innards are the most disgusting thing ever...kidneys, gizzards, that is what is fed to Dogs on the RAW diet. Not humans.

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#434031 - 10/15/09 09:57 AM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
Quote:

Tripe, liver and any innards are the most disgusting thing ever...kidneys, gizzards, that is what is fed to Dogs on the RAW diet. Not humans.



The gizzards are best when they are deep-fryed and served with sweet-n-sour sauce and the liver it is best when it is sauteed in a small (finger-size) strips

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#434032 - 10/15/09 03:07 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
I just ate a whole pie of extra-large pizzza and I have gym in less than 2 hours. I don't feel so good

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#434033 - 10/20/09 11:56 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
Just baked some of my World Famous Garlic Knots:



Attachments
445911-GarlicKnots.jpg (6 downloads)


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#434034 - 10/21/09 12:47 AM Re: Panzer Shit
Steezo Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 01/11/06
Posts: 5287
Loc: Anchorage, Alaska
The last time I saw something that looked like that, it was in the toilet and I thought I had liver failure.
_________________________
"Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars." - Martin Luther King, Jr.

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#434035 - 10/21/09 01:59 AM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
Quote:

The last time I saw something that looked like that, it was in the toilet and I thought I had liver failure.



It's a garlic knot, an authentic one and not some dough puff.

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#434036 - 10/21/09 03:28 AM Re: Panzer Shit
inebriated kiwi Offline
Internet Tough Guy

Registered: 12/25/08
Posts: 843
Loc: Sydney Australia
They look like week old dog turds.

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#434037 - 10/21/09 08:43 AM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
Quote:

They look like week old dog turds.



Nah, they more look like your face

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#434038 - 10/21/09 12:16 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Bluecipher Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 06/09/03
Posts: 5096
Loc:
Quote:

They look like week old dog turds.




Week-old dog turds left out in the rain.
_________________________
-------------------
Mild Mannered Minion
-------------------
I feel the pull on the rope, let me off at the rainbow
-Anyway, Genesis

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#434039 - 10/21/09 01:19 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
And here are some of my tongue-smacking cinnamon sticks:



Attachments
446016-CinnamonSticks.jpg (5 downloads)


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#434040 - 10/21/09 02:54 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Bluecipher Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 06/09/03
Posts: 5096
Loc:
OK, at least those are less offensive looking.
_________________________
-------------------
Mild Mannered Minion
-------------------
I feel the pull on the rope, let me off at the rainbow
-Anyway, Genesis

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#434041 - 10/21/09 05:53 PM Re: Panzer Shit
gia jordan Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
Panzer, if you worked food service, they'd make you wear a hair net for your entire body.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K

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#434042 - 10/21/09 07:16 PM Re: Panzer Shit
wannacorndog Offline
Human Garbage

Registered: 03/14/08
Posts: 1613
Loc: Liqour Hole, Kentucky
Quote:

Panzer, if you worked food service, they'd make you wear a hair net for your entire body.





Attachments
446057-body_net.gif (6 downloads)

_________________________
Being Canadian is not a disease. It just feels like one. TUP

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#434043 - 10/21/09 07:40 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Vice Admiral Offline
Human Garbage

Registered: 09/18/08
Posts: 1574
Loc: DIEGO!
Where are you getting the dough for these garlic knots and cinnamon sticks? This looks suspiciously like something also from a can or an aluminized cardboard tube.

For all your kvetching about this or that "ripoff" and your crowing about various so-called bargains you've found, you should be advised that baking bread costs just pennies -- *if* you start from a bag of flour, some yeast and some salt.

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#434044 - 10/21/09 09:39 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
Quote:

Where are you getting the dough for these garlic knots and cinnamon sticks? This looks suspiciously like something also from a can or an aluminized cardboard tube.

For all your kvetching about this or that "ripoff" and your crowing about various so-called bargains you've found, you should be advised that baking bread costs just pennies -- *if* you start from a bag of flour, some yeast and some salt.



Nah, thats the dough that I made myself, I just screwed up with the yeast and it was kinda like a sourdough. The recipe did not specified the exact amount of yeast, so I thought - the more the better . But yeah, it comes up very cheap it terms of making it by yourself as opposed to buying it in store. For 10lbs of flour I paid $2.98 and for these garlic knots and the cinnamon sticks I only used 2 and 1/2 cups of flour. I wanted to bake the french baguette right now but some neighbor woman complained earlier that my night baking session was keeping her awake whole night, so I will bake the bread tommorow in the morning.

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#434045 - 10/21/09 10:11 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Steezo Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 01/11/06
Posts: 5287
Loc: Anchorage, Alaska
Less yeast and a longer fermentation time will give the dough a better flavor. For New York style pizza or garlic knots, I usually form the dough into balls and place them in large ziplock bags in the fridge for 3+ days. Let them come to room temp for at least 2 hours prior to baking. I'm not going to get into Neapolitan style dough because your oven doesn't get hot enough to make anything decent.

If you're going to make any actually pizza, get a pizza stone. And let your oven heat up at the highest setting for about an hour with the stone in the oven. For pizza, you want to use a really hot oven and a short baking time. The hot temp will cause the dough to spring up when you place the pizza on the stone. The short baking time will keep it from drying out. For a home oven, you might want to add some honey or olive oil to the dough recipe to help it to brown faster at a lower temperature. This will also help to keep your garlic knots from looking like pale turds.

Also, you are using real butter & real minced garlic, right?
_________________________
"Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars." - Martin Luther King, Jr.

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#434046 - 10/21/09 10:50 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Vice Admiral Offline
Human Garbage

Registered: 09/18/08
Posts: 1574
Loc: DIEGO!
Since Panzer's into saving dosh, a large unglazed terracotta tile is a good substitute for a packaged "official pizza stone" pizza stone. The glazing is poisonous to humans, much like the rest of Panzer's diet, so for Alex it may not be so important that the stone be unglazed. For other humans who may be reading this, make absolutely 100% sure the tile is unglazed if you want to stay healthy.

And don't wash the tile with anything other than a water rinse. No soap. Terracotta will soak up the soap and flavor everything else you cook on it with a soapy pong.

A pizza stone will vastly improve any breads you make. It's a good investment, or potentially a lot of fun as you try to con a free terracotta tile out of some small manufactory.

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#434047 - 10/21/09 10:56 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Vice Admiral Offline
Human Garbage

Registered: 09/18/08
Posts: 1574
Loc: DIEGO!
As long as we're getting Neapolitan, do a search for "pizza fritta". It's Panzer heaven!

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#434048 - 10/21/09 11:40 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Steezo Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 01/11/06
Posts: 5287
Loc: Anchorage, Alaska
An easy/cheap bastardization of pizza that would be right up Panzer's alley would be pizza muffin rolls. Spread out the dough, put on all the sauce, cheese & toppings. Then roll the whole thing up, slice it into rolls and cook them in a nonstick muffin pan. It might even taste good.
_________________________
"Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars." - Martin Luther King, Jr.

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#434049 - 10/21/09 11:46 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
Quote:

Less yeast and a longer fermentation time will give the dough a better flavor. For New York style pizza or garlic knots, I usually form the dough into balls and place them in large ziplock bags in the fridge for 3+ days. Let them come to room temp for at least 2 hours prior to baking. I'm not going to get into Neapolitan style dough because your oven doesn't get hot enough to make anything decent.

If you're going to make any actually pizza, get a pizza stone. And let your oven heat up at the highest setting for about an hour with the stone in the oven. For pizza, you want to use a really hot oven and a short baking time. The hot temp will cause the dough to spring up when you place the pizza on the stone. The short baking time will keep it from drying out. For a home oven, you might want to add some honey or olive oil to the dough recipe to help it to brown faster at a lower temperature. This will also help to keep your garlic knots from looking like pale turds.

Also, you are using real butter & real minced garlic, right?




I just made the dough for tommorow's bread and put it into the fridge.

I have a pizza stone.

All I had is margarine, olive oil and garlic powder for the "garlic butter".

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#434050 - 10/21/09 11:58 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
This was the first pizza I made, The Turd Pizza:



Attachments
446094-TurdPizza.jpg (5 downloads)


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#434051 - 10/22/09 12:14 AM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
And this is how the pizza came out with the stone:



Attachments
446096-panzerpizza.jpg (6 downloads)


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#434052 - 10/22/09 12:31 AM Re: Panzer Shit
Steezo Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 01/11/06
Posts: 5287
Loc: Anchorage, Alaska
OK. That actually doesn't look completely awful for a first attempt. I mean the second pizza, not the turd one.

How hot was the oven? Did you preheat the pizza stone? And how long did it cook for?

With not much work, in the near future you may actually be able to cook food that real humans would consider eating.
_________________________
"Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars." - Martin Luther King, Jr.

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#434053 - 10/22/09 03:24 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
So here is my Panzer Bread, it tasted good, I eat it all:



Attachments
446151-PanzerBread.jpg (6 downloads)


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#434054 - 10/22/09 03:45 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Vice Admiral Offline
Human Garbage

Registered: 09/18/08
Posts: 1574
Loc: DIEGO!
The way that bread browned (scorched, actually) it looks like your oven is too hot. Next go-round try a lower temperature. But a good start. The smell of good bread baking is like a pussy magnet; bake with your door open once you get good at it and see who comes around for a taste. Open your windows too, so the place doesn't look and smell like a dungeon.

It's sad to hear you only have margarine around the house. Margarine is an abomination. You can easily make your own butter, too, champ. I only do that on special weekend occasions (usually I just buy good stuff from the store), but it really impresses the ladies. Margarine, alas, decidedly does not.

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#434055 - 10/22/09 04:31 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Richard Hungwell Offline
Poodle Killer
Internet Tough Guy

Registered: 02/24/06
Posts: 812
Loc: Rubbing dicks with strange guy...
That butter recipe,,Very nice..!

Al when you roll out your dough for your Wheel [pizza] put a little dusting of cornmeal down..It will give the crust a nice texture[ Don't worry its cheap,, and a small bag will last you along time]..

I won't say much because i think Steezo has this one covered..

But i will be following intently...!


Edited by Richard Hungwell (10/22/09 04:35 PM)
_________________________
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King Richard

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#434056 - 10/22/09 04:40 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Vice Admiral Offline
Human Garbage

Registered: 09/18/08
Posts: 1574
Loc: DIEGO!
Yeah, a dusting of cornmeal on the pizza stone will make it a lot easier to slide your breads out of the oven. When I see the handles on Panzer's pizza stone (no no no no -- it stays in the oven to cool down slowly) it seems to me that he hasn't been apprised of the usefulness of cornmeal. My guess is he takes the stone out in order to prise the bread off the stone.

Anyway, one step at a time. Alex Panzer is making actual food.

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#434057 - 10/22/09 05:03 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
Quote:

That butter recipe,,Very nice..!

Al when you roll out your dough for your Wheel [pizza] put a little dusting of cornmeal down..It will give the crust a nice texture[ Don't worry its cheap,, and a small bag will last you along time]..

I won't say much because i think Steezo has this one covered..

But i will be following intently...!



Are you sure that it is cornmeal? At local pizza joint they dunk the dough into a big bowl that has something that looks more like bread crumbs.

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#434058 - 10/22/09 05:29 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Richard Hungwell Offline
Poodle Killer
Internet Tough Guy

Registered: 02/24/06
Posts: 812
Loc: Rubbing dicks with strange guy...
Restaraunts wil have different variations,,but Corn meal is good enough for you.

This is one of your pizza's you posted a pic of..You see that stuff on the crust.. Corn meal Dude..!

_________________________
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King Richard

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#434059 - 10/22/09 07:00 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Vice Admiral Offline
Human Garbage

Registered: 09/18/08
Posts: 1574
Loc: DIEGO!
Alex, because it's more resilient (why do you think the kernels make it all the way through your colon?) and has a higher scorching temperature than wheat flour, cornmeal is used as a kind of "bread lube" to keep the bread off the pizza stone or the masonry floor of your oven. It reduces the surface area of the glutinous (and therefore) sticky bread dough in contact with the stone.

Cornmeal is also hell on wheels for battering pieces of fish and/or chicken before you deep-fry them. You like deep-fried bits of mystery meat, right Alex? That alone should get you interested to buy a bag of cornmeal.

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#434060 - 10/22/09 07:08 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
Quote:

Restaraunts wil have different variations,,but Corn meal is good enough for you.

This is one of your pizza's you posted a pic of..You see that stuff on the crust.. Corn meal Dude..!





How you know that that is cornmeal and not the crumbs? Where will I store the cornmeal and how long can I store it for?

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#434061 - 10/22/09 07:28 PM Re: Panzer Shit
99% Fiction Offline
Registered Sex Offender

Registered: 12/16/08
Posts: 2401
You put it on your shelf, and you throw it away once you see meal worms in it. Unless you'd prefer to just pick the worms out.
_________________________
"Guage once told me that there is nothing worse than eaten ass of a black dude thats been huffen drain cleaner the night befor." - delanoojos

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#434062 - 10/22/09 07:32 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
Quote:

Alex, because it's more resilient (why do you think the kernels make it all the way through your colon?) and has a higher scorching temperature than wheat flour, cornmeal is used as a kind of "bread lube" to keep the bread off the pizza stone or the masonry floor of your oven. It reduces the surface area of the glutinous (and therefore) sticky bread dough in contact with the stone.

Cornmeal is also hell on wheels for battering pieces of fish and/or chicken before you deep-fry them. You like deep-fried bits of mystery meat, right Alex? That alone should get you interested to buy a bag of cornmeal.



I guess I should buy some corn meal. How much does it goes for?

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#434063 - 10/22/09 08:02 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Vice Admiral Offline
Human Garbage

Registered: 09/18/08
Posts: 1574
Loc: DIEGO!
A basic one-pound bag should be between $1.49 and $1.99 at the supermarket, I'd guess. But I don't know New York prices. If you let yourself get talked into fancy-pants blue cornmeal (which is not all that exotic in the Southwest) you might spend $10.00 a pound.

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#434064 - 10/22/09 08:14 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
Quote:

A basic one-pound bag should be between $1.49 and $1.99 at the supermarket, I'd guess. But I don't know New York prices. If you let yourself get talked into fancy-pants blue cornmeal (which is not all that exotic in the Southwest) you might spend $10.00 a pound.



$1.00 OFF coupon would be handy for this.

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#434065 - 10/22/09 09:10 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Steezo Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 01/11/06
Posts: 5287
Loc: Anchorage, Alaska
Do you have a pizza peel? It's that wooden thing they use to slide the pizzas in and out of the oven. If not, get one. You leave the pizza stone in the oven all the time and use the peel slide it on and off the pizza stone.

And don't buy cornmeal. It's gritty and gross. Get semolina and spread it lightly all over the pizza peel before you put the spread out dough on top of it. The semolina acts like tiny ball bearings that let the pizza roll off of the peel easily. If you aren't using a pizza peel, there's no reason to use either cornmeal or semolina. And as long as your oven & pizza stone are hot enough, the pizza should never stick to the stone.
_________________________
"Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars." - Martin Luther King, Jr.

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#434066 - 10/22/09 09:23 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Bornyo Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 09/23/04
Posts: 10321
Semolina is for pussies. It's just "wheat meal". Do you want the real deal like grits (made from corn) or shit food like cream of wheat (semolina)? No man would pick cream of wheat over grits.

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#434067 - 10/22/09 09:23 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Fiend Offline
Porn Fucking Master

Registered: 11/04/05
Posts: 3509
Loc: Pit of Despair
Quote:

Quote:

A basic one-pound bag should be between $1.49 and $1.99 at the supermarket, I'd guess. But I don't know New York prices. If you let yourself get talked into fancy-pants blue cornmeal (which is not all that exotic in the Southwest) you might spend $10.00 a pound.



$1.00 OFF coupon would be handy for this.




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Fap, Fap, Fap

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#434068 - 10/22/09 09:36 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Steezo Offline
Porn Jesus

Registered: 01/11/06
Posts: 5287
Loc: Anchorage, Alaska
Quote:

Semolina is for pussies. It's just "wheat meal". Do you want the real deal like grits (made from corn) or shit food like cream of wheat (semolina)? No man would pick cream of wheat over grits.




Pizza is made of mostly fucking wheat (ie. flour). You ever eat a corn pizza? Semolina doesn't alter the flavor of the pizza much and it doesn't leave big gritty chunks of corn on the bottom of the pizza. If he were capable of using just flour, I would recommend dusting the peel with flour. But that isn't going to be happening any time soon.
_________________________
"Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars." - Martin Luther King, Jr.

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#434069 - 10/22/09 09:44 PM Re: Panzer Shit
Uncle Joe Offline
Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus

Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
Quote:

Do you have a pizza peel? It's that wooden thing they use to slide the pizzas in and out of the oven. If not, get one. You leave the pizza stone in the oven all the time and use the peel slide it on and off the pizza stone.

And don't buy cornmeal. It's gritty and gross. Get semolina and spread it lightly all over the pizza peel before you put the spread out dough on top of it. The semolina acts like tiny ball bearings that let the pizza roll off of the peel easily. If you aren't using a pizza peel, there's no reason to use either cornmeal or semolina. And as long as your oven & pizza stone are hot enough, the pizza should never stick to the stone.



I don't have a pizza peel, my range/oven is only 24" wide and the oven lid does not opens all the way down because of my tiny kitchen. But I got one of those cake throwels.

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