Secret trip to South America, huh? Better update my odds.

Homosexual affair 1:1 odds
Transexual affair 1.5:1
Heterosexual affair 2:1 odds
illegal drug addiction 3:1 odds
Undisclosed mental illness 4:1 odds
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--Some of us look for The Way in opium and some in God, some of us in whiskey and some in love. It is all the same Way and it leads nowhither.