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#423343 - 05/11/09 01:50 PM
Porno Dan Is Illiterate
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/20/05
Posts: 9195
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Preface: the Latin adverb sic roughly translates as "as such." Editors use it to note archaic usage of a language, or to note grammatical errors in quotations. It shows up like so: "words words words [sic] words words." You get the point. With that, I present Porno Dan's latest press release. Quote:
I had an interview with Fox Magazine [sic] for our soon to be released DVD, Snort that Cum Volume 1 [sic]. I did the interview with the master of perversion, Jeff Hudis, a few days ago. [sic] I have done numerous interviews in my life with national radio shows like, [sic] Opie & Anthony [sic] and Don & Mike [sic], adult industry publications like, [sic] XBIZ and AVN and even the Nation’s second largest newspaper, The Washington Post. [sic] It is safe to say I have never laughed so much as I did in this interview.
The concept for our Snort That Cum [sic] DVD is so ridiculous that it may take off and do very well. I truly hope it to does well as we have almost shot enough scenes so that we can launch a site. We have filmed some of the hottest young girls in this business including Tanner Mayes, Sierra Skye, Amy Starz, Natasha Nice and Isis Monroe snorting cum. Perhaps the most amazing thing about this is that some of the girls like Britney Stevens and Tara Lynn Foxx are viewing this as a competition and are begging me for their chance to shine.
People are going to be either disgusted or [sic] amused, or maybe both by this content. Either way one thing is for sure, it will stand in the vast sea of porn that is produced. The fact that a National Men’s [sic] magazine took them [sic] time to call me to [sic] an interview about the DVD before it is even released, [sic] shows just that.
Yes, Snort That Cum may be one of the most silly and outrageous ideas I have ever had, and as anyone who knows me will attest - [sic] that is quite a statement.
And by the way, "stand in a vast sea of porn"--what does that mean? Dan, quit mixing your bad metaphors, mix in some junior high school English usage, quit using formal nouns as appositives, maybe even attempt a contraction or two.
Malice can probably help you out--he went to [EonMaGai] kollege and awl. [/EonmcGai] 
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#423344 - 05/11/09 02:40 PM
Re: Porno Dan Is Illiterate
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 4856
Loc: The 4th International
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You provide no link, Willie. May I assume that every [sic] I read in above text comes from Dan's pen?
_________________________
The only thing you got that I want, is your suffering.
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#423345 - 05/11/09 02:59 PM
Re: Porno Dan Is Illiterate
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/20/05
Posts: 9195
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#423351 - 05/12/09 10:29 AM
Re: Porno Dan Is Illiterate
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/20/05
Posts: 9195
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Quote:
[lurk off]
An English degree? How's that working out for you?
Evidently a lot better than your Pop-Tarts GED.
Quote:
I DON'T have an English degree, but I read what you wrote as "porno dan uses sic too much". Reapply original comment, perhaps?
[lurk on]
You still don't get it, do you? I'll be polite and explain it: when you cite a quotation that has an obvious usage error, you insert [sic] as a note to the reader that you're citing the quotation as-is. The person writing the quote doesn't use it, otherwise they would probably not make the mistake in the first place.
Incredible.
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#423357 - 05/12/09 02:59 PM
Re: Porno Dan Is Illiterate
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@
Porn Jesus
Registered: 10/19/06
Posts: 9958
Loc: fortified
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Who cares... Check out buckethead.
If you went into Starbucks and ordered a bucket of shit, mochacinno, Puss-nuts Dan would roll out.
_________________________
i just lock, load, and regret. - jamesn
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#423358 - 05/12/09 04:49 PM
Re: Porno Dan Is Illiterate
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 03/22/07
Posts: 5186
Loc: Joshua Tree National Park
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That's good camera work. You can't even see the bolts on the sides of his neck.
_________________________
I would eat Allie Sin's asshole until I got an emotion out of her.-Jerkules
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#423359 - 05/12/09 05:05 PM
Re: Porno Dan Is Illiterate
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 11/15/05
Posts: 385
Loc: Porn Valley, USA
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Quote:
SNORT THAT CUM will be featured in the September issue of FOX XXXTREME.
Thank you very much for your support. Snort That Cum is sure to be an instant cult classic.
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#423364 - 05/14/09 05:12 AM
Re: Porno Dan Is Illiterate
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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Now truth be told, and those of you who have been here long enough KNOW this....I, da burglar, really hold no true ill will towards anyone. Even Smelly Monkey Productions....
And I have no problem with Porno Dan....Hey, to each Pervert his or her own. We are all fucked up in some way shape or form (or all three)...if producing/starring/writing about bad PORN is Dan's way of getting by in life without eating a gun or shooting other people randomly, then more power to him. You do what makes you happy Dan...
But, as strong a depiction on the abject laziness and debauched nature, and lack of noble purpose, of today;s Under age 40 population as this picture is, I have only ONE question to ask:
WHY DOES DAN HAVE RUG BURNS on his knee caps? More importantly, do chicks like Elctrostatic find this to be sexy? (the rug burns on guys' knee caps, not the snorting of cum off Porn Mags?)
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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#423365 - 05/14/09 05:29 AM
Re: Porno Dan Is Illiterate
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/02/05
Posts: 5750
Loc: ATLANTIC CITY
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You know what? Take a good look at the Chick's expression in Profile....does she seem to be having an introspective moment of "Am I really doing this?"-itis before she inhales the substance that, 57 seconds before, was inside Porno Dan's Prostate and Testicles??? Does she understand that there are 25 Million tiny little spermatozoa swimming around on the cover of Charlie's Magazine, and that each one of those 25 million little wee-beasties represents a potential human being? Is she having a moment of Doubt and angst about putting those 25 Million little people up into here Booger Factory?
Burglar Predicts:
Next Month, Smelly Monkey will break a news story that will rock Porn Valley, and the AIM Clinic to its non-existent Core. "Dr." Sharon Mitchell will grant Monkey an exclusive interview revealing the latest dirty secret to be swept under the carpet by Porn Agents and Producers to prevent what little business that still exists from completely drying up like a booger flicked onto the floor of an 11 year old's room. Nasal Gonnorhea!!!!!
The problem will come to light when the boogers and snot of porn whores begins to change, and all the coke they snort no longer is absorbed via their shot out and infected Nostrils. The dampening effect this will have on Porn production is intuitively depressing. Producers who Pay THEIR WHORES IN COKE ARE TOTALLY FUCKED.
_________________________
Are you gonna eat that?
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#423366 - 05/14/09 10:07 AM
Re: Porno Dan Is Illiterate
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 11/15/05
Posts: 385
Loc: Porn Valley, USA
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Quote:
WHY DOES DAN HAVE RUG BURNS on his knee caps?
She was sitting on the bench while knelt in front of her and fucked her with sex toys.
That is how I jacked up my knees.
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#423367 - 05/14/09 10:50 AM
Re: Porno Dan Is Illiterate
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Sex Slave Trader
Registered: 01/10/06
Posts: 1487
Loc: NYC
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Attachments
412045-kneejacker.JPG (20 downloads)
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#423370 - 05/15/09 02:00 AM
Re: Porno Dan Is Illiterate
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Sex Slave Trader
Registered: 11/14/04
Posts: 1460
Loc: Down there
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#423372 - 05/17/09 09:27 PM
Re: Porno Dan Is Illiterate
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Quote:
many props go to the dan....i wouldnt go down on the tainted whores.....nasty bitchez.
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#423373 - 05/17/09 10:40 PM
Re: Porno Dan Is Illiterate
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Internet Tough Guy
Registered: 01/26/09
Posts: 898
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I hope they were done with the dildos. 
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