I think it's right up your alley. http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/

Lots of laughs.

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(650): oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'

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^ That's just bassackwards !

Has to be the best link I found on XPT, thanks, B! Here are some texts that looked like they could be from from certain posters:

Quote:

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(972): Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
(469): Ya, why?
(972): We should try that some time.

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--Mark_J.

Quote:

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(718): There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...

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--Gigi

Quote:

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(510): So drunk, too bad you don't want this


(970): Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
(970): Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.

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--Bornyo!

Quote:

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(440): I love you
(720): are you drunk
(440): yes but I def love you, we should get married
(720): But I'm Jewish
(440): embrace Jesus

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--Coke to electrostatic.

Quote:

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(703): Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT!
(540): awesome babe! drinks tonight!
(703): Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.

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--Mr. & Mrs. Cypher

Quote:

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(313): Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
(1-313): "omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"

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-- Mr. Static and me.


There was one that reminded me of a Jamesn post, but I lost it. TFLN IS SOOO XPT post-like... <3