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Max Online: 2168 @ 12/09/25 08:14 PM
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#418017 - 04/22/09 01:43 AM
What do your friends say to you when you're drunk?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/16/08
Posts: 4257
Loc: Counting Kisses
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Mine say
"stop dancing youre gonna get us pulled over, *@&^%$%^&*!"
oooor
"hey, are yougonnapuke?, can you hold it?"
I know they say more stuff but I don't remember....
so what DO YOUR FRIENDS SAY? Do YOU remember?! 
did i spell it right, "friends"?
_________________________
"Nature already created the perfect dishwasher....its called a woman." - Fiend
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#418018 - 04/22/09 01:45 AM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Kurt Lackwood's Fluffer
Registered: 05/22/08
Posts: 1272
Loc: In a cesspool of phonies and d...
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"Quit posting."
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Jeff Jordan: "Common man from LA"
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#418019 - 04/22/09 01:49 AM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/16/08
Posts: 4257
Loc: Counting Kisses
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YOU LOVE IT! <3
"im right behind you washing the windows"- Jeff
_________________________
"Nature already created the perfect dishwasher....its called a woman." - Fiend
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#418021 - 04/22/09 06:45 AM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 10/30/06
Posts: 3812
Loc: Neither here, nor there.
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Hey Electro, you forgot about this one...
"Don't worry mommy, I'll get us home safe."
Technically that would be your family though, so let's go with this instead...
"Holy fucking shit Electrosrealname, where did you leave the baby?!?!"
_________________________
"You know this is XXXPornTalk.com right? You sound like an ADT person. I want to poop on you." -Malice
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#418023 - 04/22/09 01:01 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Porn Fucking Master
Registered: 11/04/05
Posts: 3509
Loc: Pit of Despair
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"I don't get it, you are SUCH a good guy when you're drunk."
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Fap, Fap, Fap
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#418024 - 04/22/09 02:44 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/16/08
Posts: 4257
Loc: Counting Kisses
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#418025 - 04/23/09 11:29 AM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/12/08
Posts: 373
Loc: Wherever I May Roam
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"Dirty, let go of my neck, it's not funny anymore!" "Dirty, don't hit me with your rig...again!" and "Dirty, put down the tirethumper, we can talk about thi..." all seem to be real common these days, along with the usual "Dirty, get your dick outta my ___________" -Keep It Dirty 
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"...The "friend" of Pretty that Dirty finger blasted in church school..." -Lou Cypher
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#418026 - 04/23/09 12:17 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're drunk?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/20/05
Posts: 9195
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Quote:
Mine say
"stop dancing youre gonna get us pulled over, *@&^%$%^&*!"
oooor
"hey, are yougonnapuke?, can you hold it?"
I know they say more stuff but I don't remember....
so what DO YOUR FRIENDS SAY? Do YOU remember?!
did i spell it right, "friends"?
You're never drunk. You're just fucked up on meth and coke, waiting for DHS to take your children away.
You are the most pathetic human being ever to post here. I hope you die soon so your children can find a respectable home with parents who actually care for them.
Die, you fucking piece of shit, DIE! 
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#418029 - 04/23/09 03:51 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're drunk?
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Sex Slave Trader
Registered: 09/20/05
Posts: 1326
Loc: Yosisterisawhore, CA
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My friends usually yell, "Aww shit, keep him away from the fucking jukebox!"
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If I wanted to hear a crazy cunt talk about her kids I would just go to a regular bar and talk to the single moms there instead. - Fiend
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#418032 - 04/24/09 08:58 AM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're drunk?
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/12/08
Posts: 373
Loc: Wherever I May Roam
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A friend of Pretty's once told me that I played doctor with her in kindergarten, but I don't really remember it. Does that count? She's CERTAIN of it, as though it were traumatic enough to remember or some shit, whatever. Knows for a FACT it was me because of my last name (there's only 14 or so of us) and the kindergarten I went to and the year. She's got me pegged, but I really don't remember it. Was I drinking to much of the communion wine during chapel? -Keep It Sterile ...and what the fuck kinda Lutheran kindergarten let's you get away with playin' doc anyway?!?! I couldn't have been THAT wiley, I mean really!?!?!? Weird how I learned damn near EVERYTHING I know about sex from the Lutheran Church, or at least, while at church lol. God bless youth groups!!!
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"...The "friend" of Pretty that Dirty finger blasted in church school..." -Lou Cypher
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#418036 - 04/24/09 12:33 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're drunk?
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/02/09
Posts: 316
Loc: Outside Daddy's new Church
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#418038 - 04/24/09 02:49 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're drunk?
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/12/08
Posts: 373
Loc: Wherever I May Roam
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I'll have to ask Pretty if she remembers it at all...I'm sure she does, but the "friend" Kathy or whatever was actually at the apartment building that Pretty lived in at the time in NoHo looking for the chick that lived behind Pretty. Her name was Roxy, and she was a drug dealing hooker. How her and "Kathy" knew each other I don't know, but aren't you naturally guilty by association anyway? Anywho, as "Karri" or whatever was leaving, she spotted Pretty and I, and knew us both, but from different places. Makes me wonder if Pretty ever played docta with her as well. Hmmm. -Keep It Dirty ..and I'm still not sure if this validates the theory for ya or not, but her hangin' with the "wrong" crowd is a helluva goos start! lol
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"...The "friend" of Pretty that Dirty finger blasted in church school..." -Lou Cypher
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#418039 - 04/24/09 02:56 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're drunk?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/16/08
Posts: 4257
Loc: Counting Kisses
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^ What the hell are you talking about?
_________________________
"Nature already created the perfect dishwasher....its called a woman." - Fiend
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#418040 - 04/24/09 03:04 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 10/19/06
Posts: 9958
Loc: fortified
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The "friend" of Pretty that Dirty finger blasted in church school is Kathy/Kerri. That whore lived in the same building as Pretty and thats how Dirty met Kathy, for the second time.
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i just lock, load, and regret. - jamesn
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#418041 - 04/24/09 08:51 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/12/08
Posts: 373
Loc: Wherever I May Roam
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WTF?! Lou's followin' along, where the fuck are you at Electro, Jamba Juice? Fuckin' Lou knows what happened better than I do now! -Keep It Dirty ...yes I derailed your thread, and yes, I will continue to enjoy doing so, and yes, I have had a few to drink tonight so yes, I will try to remember what you're saying to me. Huh?
_________________________
"...The "friend" of Pretty that Dirty finger blasted in church school..." -Lou Cypher
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#418042 - 04/24/09 11:29 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're drunk?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 4470
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Dance with me.
To which I reply, I can't dance, and then process to make a complete ass of myself.
_________________________
Because you already yelled 'dropping prices!!!' after Red Light canned you. - Gia Jordan to Brandon Iron
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#418044 - 04/25/09 09:29 AM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're drunk?
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/16/08
Posts: 4257
Loc: Counting Kisses
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Viz,
I'm starting to get the feeling that all the text in your posts directed at me or about me, just equal to one big fuckin' one of these:  !!
Admit it already, yes?
_________________________
"Nature already created the perfect dishwasher....its called a woman." - Fiend
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#418045 - 04/27/09 05:21 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're drunk?
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/12/08
Posts: 373
Loc: Wherever I May Roam
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When I'm drunk, my friends yell "SHOW YOUR TITS!" as loud as they can. Both of my friends. How about yours? -Keep It Dirty
_________________________
"...The "friend" of Pretty that Dirty finger blasted in church school..." -Lou Cypher
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#418046 - 04/27/09 05:25 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 03/29/08
Posts: 1991
Loc: colorado
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that was kathy dirty  i remember that i went to continuation with her in burbank i dont kno where you knew her from lol she was a cool chick and im sure she wasnt lying were we drunk? i dont remember being drunk
_________________________
"Should send her our way, XPT could REALLY get her warmed up for any kind of abuse she might get later. "- nugent
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#418048 - 04/27/09 06:13 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 03/29/08
Posts: 1991
Loc: colorado
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lous got eyes and ears everywhere yo
_________________________
"Should send her our way, XPT could REALLY get her warmed up for any kind of abuse she might get later. "- nugent
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#418049 - 04/27/09 06:17 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 10/19/06
Posts: 9958
Loc: fortified
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Pretty... do you still maintain that you've never been to Fort Collins?.
_________________________
i just lock, load, and regret. - jamesn
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#418050 - 04/27/09 06:18 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 03/29/08
Posts: 1991
Loc: colorado
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i havent been inside it lol
but i work like a hop skip and a jump outside of fort carson?
_________________________
"Should send her our way, XPT could REALLY get her warmed up for any kind of abuse she might get later. "- nugent
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#418052 - 04/27/09 06:26 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 03/29/08
Posts: 1991
Loc: colorado
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hi you ok im having an amaretto sour and i have to go help my friend katana unpack from moving so well see what my friend says to me in a bit lol i think the one drink will about do the trick i dont drink like ever
_________________________
"Should send her our way, XPT could REALLY get her warmed up for any kind of abuse she might get later. "- nugent
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#418053 - 04/27/09 06:29 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Chronic Masturbator
Registered: 03/29/08
Posts: 1991
Loc: colorado
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lol roxanne! omg i remember her that chick that got raided right? she was awesome! she was like, this speedfreak escort girl that lived behind me lol she got like, literally raided by the swat dudes she used to dig in her walls and hide shit she knew bianca butthole and dealt tweek for the mexican mob or something she was actually really nice we ussed to go shopping at the ten dolllar store together on melrose  i miss her Quote:
I'll have to ask Pretty if she remembers it at all...I'm sure she does, but the "friend" Kathy or whatever was actually at the apartment building that Pretty lived in at the time in NoHo looking for the chick that lived behind Pretty. Her name was Roxy, and she was a drug dealing hooker. How her and "Kathy" knew each other I don't know, but aren't you naturally guilty by association anyway? Anywho, as "Karri" or whatever was leaving, she spotted Pretty and I, and knew us both, but from different places. Makes me wonder if Pretty ever played docta with her as well. Hmmm.
-Keep It Dirty
..and I'm still not sure if this validates the theory for ya or not, but her hangin' with the "wrong" crowd is a helluva goos start! lol
_________________________
"Should send her our way, XPT could REALLY get her warmed up for any kind of abuse she might get later. "- nugent
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#418054 - 04/27/09 08:20 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/12/08
Posts: 373
Loc: Wherever I May Roam
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LMFAO!!! I forgot about the raid! lol We (Pretty and I) had just met, like, a few weeks before this, and we're chillin' at like 9am watching Spongebob or whatever, eatin' our breakfast, and POOF! I look out the front window of Pretty's pad and fuckin' S.W.A.T. was just cruisin' by the window, fuckin' guns drawn and ready to throw down! OMFG there was like a small fuckin' ARMY of 'em, at least 14 or so officers of various dress and departamental stature on this raid, and they fucked that girl Roxanne's door UP! It TOTALLY planted the "I wanna be a crooked cop" seed like, right there, at that moment, in my little head (please, no "little head" jokes. It's too obvious). -Keep It Dirty  ...mothafuckin' S.W.H.O.T. team! Oh, and so as not to derail shit, Roxanne was ALWAYS drunk, or on something.
_________________________
"...The "friend" of Pretty that Dirty finger blasted in church school..." -Lou Cypher
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#418055 - 04/27/09 08:29 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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Hurry up with the Pleadz-Deadz wedding already.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#418057 - 04/28/09 05:27 AM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/12/08
Posts: 373
Loc: Wherever I May Roam
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Thanks for the sig Lou. Funniest shit I've read in a long time. lmao "finger blasted" too good. -Keep It dirty
_________________________
"...The "friend" of Pretty that Dirty finger blasted in church school..." -Lou Cypher
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#418061 - 04/28/09 01:01 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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Did I just witness the first XPT marriage proposal? Where are you crazy kids registered?
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#418062 - 04/28/09 01:08 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/12/08
Posts: 373
Loc: Wherever I May Roam
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Oh fuck, she said YES?!?!?! Now I have to go through with it. Pretty, I mean it, let's go to Vegas and just do it. Email me, call me, PM me, text me, smoke signal me, Qualcomm me in my rig, whatever you gotta do. Get ahold of me and we'll plan it out in more detail. I'm TOTALLY serious Pretty, I'm gonna take you to Vegas and marry you as soon as I get home. It's WAAYYY past due, and I don't want anyone else...to be my wife anyway.  -Keep It Dirty ...if we're married in Vegas, does the marriage count in Colorado as well, or does it "stay in Vegas?"
_________________________
"...The "friend" of Pretty that Dirty finger blasted in church school..." -Lou Cypher
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#418063 - 04/28/09 01:09 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Internet Tough Guy
Registered: 01/26/09
Posts: 898
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Does that mean she will only do b/g with you Dirty?
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#418064 - 04/28/09 01:30 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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Hey Dirty and Pretty, you two have to stay at The Hotel. That's where I stay. The entire joint looks amazing in pictures. Make way for some gorgeous honeymoon content.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#418066 - 04/28/09 01:37 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/12/08
Posts: 373
Loc: Wherever I May Roam
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Quote:
Does that mean she will only do b/g with you Dirty?
EWWW! Hell no! If that's the case, I'm callin' the whole thing off! lol I'm hopin' that she'll still do b/g with ME after we're married lmao! I would never begrudge ANYONE of their dream, whatever it may be, especially not Pretty. She can do whomever and whatever she pleases, as can I. So, yes, in answer to your ACTUAL question, I am still available for shoots, and yes, we can work together sometime...I'll just have to pry you off of Pretty first is all.
-Keep It Dirty
...ok, I think I might be drunk now and not know it.
_________________________
"...The "friend" of Pretty that Dirty finger blasted in church school..." -Lou Cypher
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#418067 - 04/28/09 02:15 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Internet Tough Guy
Registered: 01/26/09
Posts: 898
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What a great future husby you are!
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#418069 - 04/28/09 02:35 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Internet Tough Guy
Registered: 01/26/09
Posts: 898
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I kicked a cab months ago outside the Wynn and I still have a bruise on my toenail because of it. I have to wear very thick nail polish until it grows out.
I hate the Wynn.
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#418070 - 04/28/09 03:01 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 09/07/05
Posts: 14160
Loc: NYC
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I don't like the way the rooms look at The Wynn.
_________________________
"What I do know is that if Karen Carpenter and Mama Cass Elliot had shared that sandwich they'd both be alive today." -Michael K
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#418071 - 04/28/09 03:04 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Whoremaster
Registered: 06/22/07
Posts: 2656
Loc: Polekatz, Rte 43
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the restauants at the Wynn are the best
_________________________
"You have been banned from making any new posts or sending private messages. The reason for this ban is: meh, cause i can"
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#418073 - 04/28/09 04:17 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 4470
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Since all women are whores (not friends), I don't know if this counts, but...
She told me to put her down & stop grabbing her ass when she hugged me for the night before leaving the bar. I get a tad bit on the playfully rowdy side of inebriation. 
My guy friends are pretty basic, they always want to do shots.
_________________________
Because you already yelled 'dropping prices!!!' after Red Light canned you. - Gia Jordan to Brandon Iron
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#418075 - 04/28/09 04:29 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/25/06
Posts: 4470
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Not exactly what I had in mind... 
_________________________
Because you already yelled 'dropping prices!!!' after Red Light canned you. - Gia Jordan to Brandon Iron
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#418076 - 04/28/09 06:04 PM
Re: What do your friends say to you when you're dr
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 04/12/08
Posts: 373
Loc: Wherever I May Roam
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The Venetian. I'm only doin' this 'cuz I'll get to go to the Grand Lux Cafe' and get me some asian nachos, and Pretty will only travel for shoots and/or weddings. Anyone else gettin' married in Vegas any time soon? I'll come to YOUR wedding and call mine off. I just want the nachos. -Keep It Dirty ...or maybe someone in Vegas can book Pretty? I won't even be on-set, I promise...unless Grand Lux delivers
_________________________
"...The "friend" of Pretty that Dirty finger blasted in church school..." -Lou Cypher
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