My Penis is responsible for any success and wealth and achievement in my life.

-- Burg is fucked at birth

-- Assuming Burg lives long enough, the only way his penis will find it's way into the mouth or holes of any halfway decent looking chick is if Burg has $$Cash$$ (or drugs whic essentially means $$$) to offer such chicks...

-- Burg thus studies his crippled ass off as a youngling while still experiencing enough of life before age 18 to be able to converse with and negotiate with worldly nurses, whores and the Elizabeth "Slurpie" Wurtzels he first encounters when he enters the Holy Hallowed halls of Harvard.

The rest is Penis History....my Penis is now enjoying a semi retired life that has been slightly upstaged by the fucktards of the financial world, like Bernie Madoff, Angelo Mozillo and the "gang" at AIG Executive central....guys who all allowed their own Pathetic Penile urges to get the better of them and become so greedy as to commit Overkill in building Penis funds to pork Pretty women who demand $$ for penis servicing. Stupid fucks....


Of course, apart from my lower legs, all my life I have been at least moderately cute enough so that, not often but often enough, some chick wants my penis and its contents, no questions or $$ asked.


Still, I owe my Intellect to my Penis.

There has to be an educational plan for president obama somewhere in my inspirational Penis story.


I think baby Gia Jerkins should do a public service message for guys, interspersed with her cum gobbling scenes, that says "Boys, if you want to be able to afford to do this, then study study study...." That would be hott.


What sucks is if I had first seen Gia gobble when I was 16 or 17 instead of 36 or 37, I'd be a fucking BILLIONAIRE....