Quote:

reminding us once again it doesn't have to turn into a thing



AA folk think if they open a beer, it'll be like opening the box in Hellraiser. Pinhead is going to pop out and say CHOOSE YOUR FATE, and they'll wake up 37 hours later in a dumpster, bleeding from a usable orifice or two.

You know Old Harvey ain't ever needed no 12-step program. The first step would always be them telling me how to live my life, and the next 11 steps would be my feet on their face and tit. HOP-SHUFFLE-STEP. HOP-SHUFFLE-STEP. I did once bang someone in a 12-step, though, which makes me infinitely qualified to make fun of it.

AA ain't nothing but another DRUG. Some people are hooked on meth. Some people are hooked on dirty martinis. Them bitches are hooked on healin'. I've got a tip for ya. If you don't feel like you can muster the self-control to live life for two weeks without attending a meeting, you're STILL A FUCKIN' ADDICT. Different day, different drug.

You can forget all that bullshit. If you wanna join up with that shit, might as well go all out and sign up for one of them cults where you castrate yourself and let the leader bang your wife and daughter, because, well he plays Guitar.