My caution is due to an unfortunate incident at the Sherman Oaks Galleria about one year ago. A friend and I were ogling young ladies but did not notice Mama Bear strolling next to her cubs. Mrs. Bear scolded the two of us for pointing at the sweet treats and we knew then that it is better to be incognito.

ordinary = herpes free

Buck up there little man, one day soon you'll need not worry about a clogged shower drain.

There is no lock on my door, Gia. All are free to come and suckle on my engorged milk-spurting man nipple....even you. We have so much in common. I'm sure you aren't angered in the least at having to share me with hundreds of your sin sisters.

STD's? We're way past STD's. Your infection level has reached such a concentration, you no longer shoot sperm, you shoot fully formed micro tumors. So Dick 'O' Cancer enjoy your toe jam party. I hope you get athletes mouth.

That's what normal girls look like, man. They are the jeans-wearing sluts at the local mall thinking they are bad asses because they made out with, like, 53 boys by high school. They take that leap, man, and that's what the fantasy is.....hot teen....lost look in her eyes....unwittingly wanting to come up to an older guy and ask to suck his dick.....has perverted dreams, many involving sex with strangers.....getting aroused at the thought of being degraded........taking a sick pleasure in masturbating to taboo sex acts.

Painted ladies who have become good prospectors in the gold digging game, bleccckkk!!....no thanks. Gimme shiny-foreheaded freckled cocksuckers, braces or not. Gimme "I have no porn outfits yet. This is my first time. I...I hope that's not going to be a p-p-problem.

NO, SWEETHEART......no problem at all. Now let's get you on your knees....height check......it's standard. Rule 2257. Great. Now everything appears to be in order here. Hmmmm, I wonder if I could reach your mouth. Here.....let's find out........yeah, thank you, Princess. Thank you. Hey! Since you've started already, why don't I take some pics.....you look great.....yeah.....now the balls.......good girl.

VERSUS:

Look! I've got to get to my next shoot before my private before my KSEX radio appearance to promote my new CD that's droppin' on the same day I'll be dropping to my knees to blow some guy named Ron Germy or something. I hope he's the hairy-chested hunk I saw on the internet. He was fucking some girl named Traci Lords. That bitch was hot. I mean she had this retro 80's thing going on right down to the leg warmers! What a babyface. She looks, like 16 or 17. Hurry up! Tonight is Prima Donna Night at the Spearmint Rhino. Hey, I've lost my Vicodin. Do you have any? Fuck, man, I keep blowing as much money as I earn so I have to stay busy doing things I don't really, truly enjoy just to pay my bills. I have self-programmed myself to deliver phony moans and groans once I get within one foot of your crotch. I now consider myself an erotic actress. You see, I am 19 and a half now and I am so much wiser than you knuckle-draggers. I want to own my own studio in the next 7 months or so, give or take a week. By next summer, I should be moving in to my own office next to that Larry Flynt dude. Man, I want a gold armchair, too! Only mine will be a 4X4....YEAH!!! "Armchair" is so mean.....I mean, why do people have to point out that it's powered by arms.....DUHH!!! They can't use their legs.....hello!! They're called krinkled people, you idiot. I bet all krinkled people are sad because they are not as hot as me. Whooooaah!! I can't imagine anything worse than.....than that! By the way, do you have any Vicodin? I have grown so used to playing a hooker that it is now just the other side of my split personality. But don't worry! I'm sure that people will never get tired of me. I am -- truly am -- a legend. My lucite trophies are monuments to the integrity of my skills. When I win one next year, I'm gonna fake like it's a cock and pretend to suck it!! Yeah!! I bet no one has thought of doing that!!!! Hey, do you have any Vicodin? Man, I am so glad Mr. Obama got elected our King.....cool, man. He used to be a Senator, you know. I prefer the Kings myself. He should have played hockey in the US instead of Canadia. I hope next election they'll keep the polls open "stripper's hours," I sleep all day, dude. I didn't vote. I'm not 25 yet. My doctor says my anti-depressants are fucking with my anti-anxiety pills. I don't even take my ADD meds anymore. They give me diarrhea when I take my diet pills. Gotta keep doing lots of anal scenes so it can be me thanking my Mom next January. God I hope our Mother-Daughter Gang Bang is out in time for nominations. Those ATMs were't easy! I love the taste of home cooking but I...I...forget it. I can't believe Prime Ministry Obama starred in that Hustler video, though. I mean, what was he thinking? He better hope no one notices and sends it to Michelle. Oh no he didden!!!! Where the fuck is my driver??? If I didn't have 3 DUIs, man, I'd fire his ass. He did hook me up with some Vicodin last week, though. I heard he's starting his own agency so I better be nice. Shit! I'm 10 minutes late for my anal scene! I guess chilli was a bad choice for lunch today. Hey! Do you have any stool hardeners to go with that Vicodin? Forget it! Found one...oh...that's a birth control pill. Didn't I....? I thought I did. (Stomach gurgles.) Fuck! I'll just teke an M&M when I get there.

I hope Paulina James is good enough for you...

No....in some ways, she never left. She sat in a box....digitally preserved....waiting...wanting....being patient like fine wine before uncorking her beauty for the world to savour. Ah, I drank deep of her beauty.

And then I popped in her mouth.

Great young lady.

If you look up "mall rat" in the dictionary that's the picture you will find.

Brandon you need to submit that pic to urban dictionary and wikipedia.

Also, wtf with that couch/chair? Man that's just hideous.

^^^

Did anyone else notice the angelic halo around Paulina's head? What a little angel...."Did it hurt?" "What?" "When you fell from Heaven..." "Oh! Hahahahaahahaha!!" "...directly into a studio in Chatsworth where they were shooting a bukkake scene.....and you were made to lick it up to bring down the budgets for American Bukkake and American Gokkun?" Dirty, dirty.

I didn't mean mall rat in a bad way but if the shoe fits...

Sir, I own 3 Sham Wows.
Besides, tiny little pinprick assholes like the one on Paulina just leave tiny little dollops of sweet perfume that I can roll around in afterwards.

All the loads are swallowed so there is no mess. There are a few stray snail trails here and there but they are just another kind of white line to snort when the mood hits me.

I am Grandmaster Gash.

Ticket to ride, white line highway
Tell all your friends, they can go my way
Pay your toll, sell your soul
Pound for pound costs more than gold
The longer you stay, the more you pay
My white lines go a long way
Either up your nose or through your vein
With nothin to gain except killin’ your brain

(Freeze! Rock! Freeze! Rock! Freeze! Rock! Freeze! Rock!)
(Blow!)

(Ahhh) Higher, baby
(Ahhh) Get higher, baby!
(Ahhh) Get higher, baby!
And don't ever come down! (Freebase!)



THE LONGER THEY STAY, THE MORE YOU PAY. Can you dig it? CAN YOU DIG IT????

Welcome to JM Productions. You just might be insane.

GagDaddy doesn't control my income. I don't help his nor do I hurt it. But you do. Think about it.

I control my income because I earn money based off my movies. If I make good movies, they make more money. At least that's what my broker, Mr. Madoff, says. He's in New York, the big leagues, baby.

Brandon, why don't you post pictures of girls anymore that you've worked with like before?

For the past 5 weeks, I had a taste of normalcy by spending 24 hours a day with a friend visiting from Prague. No time to post pics or get bjs. Just having fun with my friend. Also, my therapist said that Conky was the source of my anger and abandonment issues. I needed a break.

in other words he had a breakout.

Yes, I did have a breakout. I broke out of your mental prison, the one that lets you in my head. Instead, I chose to go places with my friend Jenna. Santa Barbara was nice. So was San Diego....San Francisco....Las Vegas.....Malibu.....etc.

I stood on the beach, turned to shore, and fell backwards into the water. My baptism made me reborn as I promised to not let you fuck with my head. I cleansed my soul. Have you? I doubt it. Last time I saw you, you were at Gladstone's on Pacific Coast Highway dumpster diving in the seafood restaurant's trash. I saw you rubbing rank tuna in your hands like so much play doh and then smelling your fingers, moaning like a drunk guy after his 11th shot.

Are you two an item? ^^

Jenna, although only 20, is a highly-paid consultant overseeing the day-to-day operations of Brandon Iron Euro Content Inc. We are currently the #4 best seller in Croatia. We are only weak in anal fisting content.

Here she is doing a taste test on the set of Scat Attack Volume 12.


Seriously, though, she is a real sweetheart who enjoyed her first visit to the US. It was nice to spend time getting to know her.

Um, reality to Brandon, anyone can have those women, they're whores. And living in a dumpster has got to be better than living with that fucked up hairy chair.

I don't get you. First you criticize me for my lack of hair and now you are going after my furniture for having some?

Sadly, my friend is back in the Czech Republic now. We are keeping in touch and I hope she returns soon. My nose is firmly back to the grindstone. Today, my grindstone was Amia Moretti.

^^^^^more, more, ^^^^^

I posted 6 pics at the blog at www.brandoniron.com. Check them out.

Thanks BI, nice litle spinner, she's a keeper. I give her:

Amen, Aminkia!

Whoo hoo!! SHE IS HALF MY AGE #7 made Editor’s Pick over at www.hotmovies.com. If you would like 30 free VOD minutes on me, write me an e-mail at brandoniron_99@yahoo.com and I will e-mail back. You must confirm your age in your e-mail.

Link to the movie: http://www.hotmovies.com/video/142525/She-Is-Half-My-Age-7/?

This title has now sold more since its release this month than any other of the previous 6 volumes in the series. Thanks to anyone who checked it out. I appreciate the support.