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#383705 - 12/25/08 08:14 PM
Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/07/06
Posts: 4268
Loc: Portland
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12 Nigga Moments
11 cheap watches
10 bath gels
9 $1 boxer briefs
8-hour shift at Burger King
7 enema tank sketches
6 dodgy vitamin supplements
5 $8 dress shirts
4 plates of black beans
3 $1 neckties
2 bottles of Zakusan mustard
and...
1 dinner with the parents at the Olive Garden
_________________________
"My people (the real Americans- descended from the original Angle-Saxon pioneers)"-Coke S.
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#383706 - 12/25/08 08:17 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Where is Mr. Personality this evening? Is he still waiting for his non-existent gifts to arrive, like Linus in the pumpkin patch?
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#383707 - 12/25/08 08:32 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 11/27/07
Posts: 4795
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Isn't Panzer a jew?
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#383708 - 12/25/08 08:37 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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When has that ever stopped him from trying to get something for nothing? Remember when he tried getting Kwanzaa gifts?
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#383709 - 12/25/08 08:54 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 11/27/07
Posts: 4795
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I forgot about that.
Hope you have a happy Kwanzaa, Alex.
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#383712 - 12/26/08 04:24 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 06/09/03
Posts: 5098
Loc:
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You will see the non-porno section of this forum full of his entries. He specializes in engineering drawings of sadistic torture devices, enema tanks, enema bunkers, pictures of black beans and barely edible food, and pictures of the detritus he buys - cheap cologne, books on T-34 tanks, etc. His fixation with enemas and bunkers makes him a likely candidate for the Sick Fuck mantle Josef Fritzl left behind when he got caught (Fritzl imprisoned his daughter and raped her for 24 years, fathering seven children by her). I think the only thing holding him back is budgetary concerns. 
_________________________
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Mild Mannered Minion
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I feel the pull on the rope, let me off at the rainbow
-Anyway, Genesis
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#383716 - 12/26/08 06:43 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Yes, but it's not wise to feed the trolls.
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#383717 - 12/27/08 06:20 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 06/09/03
Posts: 5098
Loc:
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He will "troll out" in different threads by inserting weird commentary, weirder even than mine. I wonder if he is the troll with the anti-porn message in the main chat.
_________________________
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Mild Mannered Minion
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I feel the pull on the rope, let me off at the rainbow
-Anyway, Genesis
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#383718 - 12/27/08 08:24 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Nah. If it was him, they'd all be about enemas and dirty assholes.
Besides, Panzer has no vested interest in constantly reminding us that Brandon fucks chicks "Half His Age."
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#383720 - 12/27/08 08:55 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 06/09/03
Posts: 5098
Loc:
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Damn, we woke up the troll. 
_________________________
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Mild Mannered Minion
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I feel the pull on the rope, let me off at the rainbow
-Anyway, Genesis
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#383721 - 12/27/08 09:11 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
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Quote:
Damn, we woke up the troll.
I just did a random name search of my name and found this thread. I do it more frequently on ADT to see what kind of bad things they talk about me there.
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#383723 - 12/27/08 10:19 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 4856
Loc: The 4th International
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Let me assure you, Alex, that you're still a household name over there. From my own personal experience in the last few days.
Keep posting, mate!
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The only thing you got that I want, is your suffering.
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#383724 - 12/27/08 10:53 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 06/09/03
Posts: 5098
Loc:
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In order to thwart Panzer's searches for his own name, let us now refer to him as Uncle Vanya, BabushkaKiller, or the more appropriate EnemaSlave.
_________________________
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Mild Mannered Minion
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I feel the pull on the rope, let me off at the rainbow
-Anyway, Genesis
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#383725 - 12/27/08 11:02 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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Quote:
In order to thwart Panzer's searches for his own name, let us now refer to him as Uncle Vanya, BabushkaKiller, or the more appropriate EnemaSlave.
We do the same thing for He Who Cannot Get Wood. But fer fuck's sake don't post it where he can see it. 
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#383726 - 12/27/08 12:24 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 11/27/07
Posts: 4795
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Oh dear. Panzer's Christmas Hampers."American foods 'TO DIE FOR'."
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#383728 - 12/28/08 09:17 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
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Quote:
I thought they kicked you off ADT Panzer?
And who is so narcissistic and/or insecure they have to search their name on a message board to see if people are talking about them. Strange indeed.
I even save the quotes.
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#383730 - 12/28/08 09:33 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
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Quote:
Quote:
What cheap cologne? Why everyone says cheap cologne? If I bought it for cheap it doesn't mean that the actual product is cheap, I just try to find the best price, because, why should I pay more when I can pay less? Over 90% of the colognes that I have are popular and highly rated/reviewed.
Guapo posted your review of Hummer cologne in the latest purchast thread. That's the only 'hummer' you're ever gonna get, pal. And you still had to pay for it....
What kind of name is Guapo? Sounds like somekind of a muppet or a plush toy.
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#383731 - 12/28/08 09:42 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 11/27/07
Posts: 4795
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Guapo means "handsome/good looking" in Spanish.
I'm not a native speaker so it probably has some meanings I've never heard of.
EDIT: Enema bag jewelry. You seen this stuff Alex?
Edited by conquistador (12/28/08 09:54 AM)
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#383732 - 12/28/08 10:14 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
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Quote:
Guapo means "handsome/good looking" in Spanish.
Well, don't know about Spain but here on XPT it mean bag of turd.
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#383735 - 12/28/08 03:55 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 4856
Loc: The 4th International
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Crocodile wrote: Quote:
Omar Latif?
yessir? how can i be from service?
_________________________
The only thing you got that I want, is your suffering.
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#383738 - 12/29/08 09:37 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
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Quote:
Panzer you should do a video blog too talking about your purchases and enemas of mass destruction, you can be a internet celebrity
something like the Alex Panzer show
I thought about this too, I have a bunch of great ideas. But the thing is that I am short on funds for this kind of thing.
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#383739 - 12/29/08 10:00 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Gay For Pay
Registered: 01/26/06
Posts: 1058
Loc: Keen for Peen
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maybe you can ebay off your 32 of each useless thing to buy a video camera.
_________________________
Even though Brian Pumper sometimes tries to act like he is hardcore thug-rapper, I can tell that underneath he is a considerate, respectful guy. -tritone
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#383740 - 12/29/08 10:19 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 06/05/05
Posts: 4468
Loc: Great America
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Quote:
Quote:
Panzer you should do a video blog too talking about your purchases and enemas of mass destruction, you can be a internet celebrity
something like the Alex Panzer show
I thought about this too, I have a bunch of great ideas. But the thing is that I am short on funds for this kind of thing.
a nice webcam and a youtube account, is not expensive
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#383742 - 12/30/08 06:31 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Panzer you should do a video blog too talking about your purchases and enemas of mass destruction, you can be a internet celebrity
something like the Alex Panzer show
I thought about this too, I have a bunch of great ideas. But the thing is that I am short on funds for this kind of thing.
a nice webcam and a youtube account, is not expensive
I got a youtube account, but I won't post pics of vids with my face in it. I prefer that no one knows how I look like.
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#383743 - 12/30/08 06:52 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 11/27/07
Posts: 4795
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Don't you think it's a little late to be worried about people seeing your face?
I just needed to google for a few minutes before finding your name and photo. You think others haven't figured this out?
Community Member Alexander G's Photo.net profile
EDIT: It should be noted that if you care about privacy you have a bizarre way of showing it. Your photo.net profile has your real name on it and your photo. (I censored your name out of my post so people would actually have to give your photo page some traffic if they wanted to find out what the G stands for).
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#383744 - 12/30/08 08:15 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 06/09/03
Posts: 5098
Loc:
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If I remember correctly, Panzer posted pictures of himself (including his mug) some months ago and only later edited the face on newer pics. By the way, very decent pics.
_________________________
-------------------
Mild Mannered Minion
-------------------
I feel the pull on the rope, let me off at the rainbow
-Anyway, Genesis
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#383745 - 12/30/08 09:16 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 06/05/05
Posts: 4468
Loc: Great America
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Panzer you should do a video blog too talking about your purchases and enemas of mass destruction, you can be a internet celebrity
something like the Alex Panzer show
I thought about this too, I have a bunch of great ideas. But the thing is that I am short on funds for this kind of thing.
a nice webcam and a youtube account, is not expensive
I got a youtube account, but I won't post pics of vids with my face in it. I prefer that no one knows how I look like.
you can use a mask alex, like machine in 8mm
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#383747 - 12/30/08 09:29 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 11/27/07
Posts: 4795
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I like the girl at the piano as well. I can't imagine photoshopping a picture for 12 hours though.
EDIT: Oops I got the time wrong:
Quote:
Mostly I did a lot of retouching, took 9 hrs of photoshoping but the results are to my likings.
Edited by conquistador (12/30/08 09:39 AM)
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#383752 - 12/30/08 03:10 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 04/14/06
Posts: 14755
Loc: Busy downloading [LEGALLY!]
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And he couldn't sneak up on her. She'd smell the kraut and Polish ketchup a mile away ...
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Amo i Gemelli!! 
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#383754 - 12/30/08 04:40 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
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Quote:
Don't you think it's a little late to be worried about people seeing your face?
I just needed to google for a few minutes before finding your name and photo. You think others haven't figured this out?
Community Member Alexander G's Photo.net profile
EDIT: It should be noted that if you care about privacy you have a bizarre way of showing it. Your photo.net profile has your real name on it and your photo. (I censored your name out of my post so people would actually have to give your photo page some traffic if they wanted to find out what the G stands for).
Yeah, that's me and the old photo of me. In the future there won't be any mugshots of my face.
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#383756 - 12/30/08 04:52 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
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Quote:
Quote:
Community Member Alexander G's Photo.net profile
I'll take "Mia at The Piano" for the win, Alexander.
Thanks, that is one of my favorite photos too. It looks really nice at 11x14 size. Here I found the original shot and made the before-after composition:
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#383758 - 12/30/08 05:21 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
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Quote:
I will say this: you did some nice Photoshop work there.
Thanks. This year I plan to do more photography, I started buying and updating more equipment. Just recently bought myself Canon EOS 5D to replace my aged EOS 10D. Next purchase will be Canon G10 and then I wanna get myself a professional wide-format printer, I set my eyes on Epson 3800 Pro.
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#383760 - 12/30/08 05:30 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
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Quote:
You should consider the Panasonic LX3 instead of the G10. They pretty much match up specs wise. The LX3 is $399 now if you look around, and is basically the same as the Leica D-Lux 4, which is TWICE the price. A real bargain for the Leica lens in itself.
http://www.luminous-landscape.com/reviews/cameras/lx3.shtml
Yeah, I know that this camera is good but I am a hardcore Canon fan, I have a lot of Canon accessories and I only use Canon cameras. G10 is around $407 on Amazon and they also throw in a free 4GB card. I have $50-worth of credit with Amazon so it is also plus. The Luminous Landscape guy also compared the G10 with a medium or a large format camera on his site. One of the reasons why I like G10 is the ability to use the ST-E2 wireless flash trigger.
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#383763 - 12/30/08 05:41 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
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Quote:
I actually prefer Canons too, but I have always wanted that Leica, so I will take it with the Panasonic label. The G10 is great, and I would buy it if the Panasonic didn't have that lens.
The lens quality sounds tempting, but whats with the 2.5x zoom?
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#383765 - 12/30/08 06:04 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Don't you think it's a little late to be worried about people seeing your face?
I just needed to google for a few minutes before finding your name and photo. You think others haven't figured this out?
Community Member Alexander G's Photo.net profile
EDIT: It should be noted that if you care about privacy you have a bizarre way of showing it. Your photo.net profile has your real name on it and your photo. (I censored your name out of my post so people would actually have to give your photo page some traffic if they wanted to find out what the G stands for).
Yeah, that's me and the old photo of me. In the future there won't be any mugshots of my face.
You bet you won't have that face. I'm in town Monday Jan 5 for the Penguins Rangers game. I'd be more than happy to meet you out front of the Garden. It will be a short conversation. Maybe bring some friends to hold the camera and the shovel.
I'm a nice guy so any pics of the shit war me and the boys wage on your concave forehead after the fact will be exclusive to you and your tard inheritents.
Tell your boys to go and fuck themselves in the ass.
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#383766 - 12/30/08 06:08 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Sex Slave Trader
Registered: 01/10/06
Posts: 1487
Loc: NYC
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Quote:
The lens quality sounds tempting, but what's with the 2.5x zoom?
Yeah, I know. That's why I have a Canon 880. I think the concept is that it's a trade-off for the high resolution lens, but it is shitty in a point-and-shoot for sure.
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#383767 - 12/30/08 06:12 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Max Hardcore Prison Bitch
Registered: 05/10/08
Posts: 201
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what a rip off, i imagined him to be substantially more creepier
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#383768 - 12/30/08 06:26 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
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Quote:
Quote:
The lens quality sounds tempting, but what's with the 2.5x zoom?
Yeah, I know. That's why I have a Canon 880. I think the concept is that it's a trade-off for the high resolution lens, but it is shitty in a point-and-shoot for sure.
Yes. I kinda thought that it is similar to the high-end Sigma point and shoot that has the fixed lens. I think that the Panasonic camera is targeted towards the Leica fans that are on a budget or who want the Leica quality, like a gateway camera.
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#383770 - 12/30/08 06:27 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Sex Slave Trader
Registered: 01/10/06
Posts: 1487
Loc: NYC
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Quote:
Yes. I kinda thought that it is similar to the high-end Sigma point and shoot that has the fixed lens. I think that the Panasonic camera is targeted towards the Leica fans that are on a budget or who want the Leica quality, like a gateway camera.
Definitely. Funny, I was just talking to someone who has that Sigma and misses the zoom after never thinking she would care.
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#383771 - 12/30/08 06:37 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Tranny Whisperer
Porn Jesus
Registered: 08/02/03
Posts: 9221
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Quote:
Quote:
Yes. I kinda thought that it is similar to the high-end Sigma point and shoot that has the fixed lens. I think that the Panasonic camera is targeted towards the Leica fans that are on a budget or who want the Leica quality, like a gateway camera.
Definitely. Funny, I was just talking to someone who has that Sigma and misses the zoom after never thinking she would care.
I suppose that it feel like a rangefinder with a fixed lens.
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#383773 - 12/31/08 07:33 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 03/22/07
Posts: 5186
Loc: Joshua Tree National Park
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Christian ought to at least let Panzer audition for the role of food photographer.
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I would eat Allie Sin's asshole until I got an emotion out of her.-Jerkules
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#383779 - 01/01/09 10:40 AM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 4856
Loc: The 4th International
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Troy, what has that to do with self respect? If I post something that brings out snarky remarks from people, it doesn't mean I have to take those remarks personal.
Alex posts something. There are replies to his post. End of story (in my opinion).
But I shouldn't be answering this question that was more or less directed at Alex.
_________________________
The only thing you got that I want, is your suffering.
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#383781 - 01/01/09 02:26 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 06/09/03
Posts: 5098
Loc:
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Everything's hunky dory until one of those 17 or 18 who loathes you -- and I must say you are not important enough to elicit that response in me -- decides to bag you, tag you and try some of those enema experiments on you. It might end up on some graphic novel sold to the edgy set.
_________________________
-------------------
Mild Mannered Minion
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I feel the pull on the rope, let me off at the rainbow
-Anyway, Genesis
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#383784 - 01/01/09 09:45 PM
Re: Alex Panzer's Twelve Days of Christmas
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Porn Jesus
Registered: 01/30/08
Posts: 7599
Loc: a site known for its tolerance...
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I, for one, truly enjoy the posts by this creepy, fat, hairy, anus-obsessed (and possibly homicidal) russian jew. They are without pretense; Panzer has no agenda other than dirty assholes.
His posts may also be crucial in clearing the books on some missing-women cases down the road....
_________________________
"I'll never forget the moment during the lovely Alyssa Allure's scene in 'American Bukkake' where the fellow got out of his wheel chair to ejaculate on her face. It was grotesque but had a certain frisson." -Sock
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