Below is a draft of an ad I plan on posting on adultfriendfinder and alt.com. I've already joined the sites. Just need to complete my ad. It's basically a gonzo scene described on paper. Kinda long. Would welcome feedback on how to make it better and more appealing.
I am looking for submissive women who think they can handle a legitimate 12-inch cock. That is my true size. No lame measuring from behind the nutsack or anything like that. Just a tape measure on top of my dick. Here's what will happen. We start out with you kneeling in front of me sucking the tip of my cock, spitting on it, getting it wet and sloppy, stroking and squeezing, giving me a handjob with both hands, tugging my monster to life. After I'm hard, we'll take a tape measure and let you mark the inches on my dick so you know what it's like to have 8, 10 and finally 12 inches of cock in your tight, wet, quivering pussy. I then lay you across the bed on your back with your head hanging over the side. I throatfuck you until you're choking and gagging, covered in your own saliva and feeling my cock push past your tonsils and down your throat. That's when I flip you over, put you on your hands and knees and see just how good of a fuckslut you are. I fuck rough and hard, with lots of hair pulling, slapping, name calling and light choking, and my goal is to fuck you until the bed breaks, going balls deep for as long as you can stand it or until your screams of pain and pleasure disturb the neighbors. When your arms and legs are trembling too much to support you, I will grab your hair and ride you down onto the mattress flat on your stomach, shifting my hips so my cock plows into your G-spot on every stroke before busting into your womb, building a crescendo of sensations so strong tunnel vision develops and the outside world falls away. All you're aware of is my cock deep in you, deeper than any man ever before, and the realization your pussy is wetter than it's ever been. And it's then you realize this is what you're made for...servicing a cock like mine. I will ream you without mercy in every position you can imagine and then some. You will also sit on top of me, facing me, and ride up and down my full 12 inches, grinding your clit against my dick every tingling inch of the way until your juices are running down your sweet, sweaty thighs. You will nibble and suck my nipples and kiss me until we both have to break to breath. You will massage my shoulders while rubbing your breasts across my neck. At some point, I will put you on your back, spread your legs as wide as I can reach, pin your knees by your ears and fuck your pussy so hard your vision goes blurry, you feel as if your insides are being rearranged and you're afraid you're about to lose control of your bodily functions (it's happened to some women, but if it does, you won't care at this point). If you start to complain, I'll stick my cock back in your mouth and make you suck it until you forget what the complaint was. When I've finished destroying your pussy, I will straddle your chest, grab you by the hair and facefuck you until I shoot my load down your throat. You'll be able to feel the spasms from my dick as the hot cum shoots out, overflows your mouth and runs down your chin and onto your breasts. After that, while you're still covered in sweat and cum and your own juices, you will clean my cock with your mouth and we'll start over again until you cannot take another stroke. And so you'll remember me even more, I'll spread your ass cheeks with my hands and you'll guide my cock until the tip of it pops in your ass just so you can feel the incredible stretching and imagine the fullness. If you're into anal, you've got an unimaginable ass fucking coming your way that will leave your asshole raw, swollen, gaping and oozing cum. If not, it goes no further than the tip. I need only about 10 minutes to recover between fucks and can cum 4-5 times a night. I am white, 6'4", 225, green eyes, shoulder-length brown hair and have a six-pack so ripped you can trace each muscle with your tongue. If you think you are up for this, let me know. We can trade face/body pics by email.
that was funny bro thank you 
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