“You can ring my be-e-e-e-e-e-ell….ring my bell.” Thanks, 1979 disco sensation Anita Ward, but you can do other things, too. You can undress your Bell, smell your Bell, and fuck your Bell. Don’t be a ding dong! Let Alice Bell suck your dong and ring in some good times. Alice said “Fuck you!” to corporate America and decided that burger joints weren't the only places that serve meat.

Born in January of 1990, Alice used to be all pimples and dimples but she grew up fast. She has an ex-fiance….FIANCE….at 18! She started sucking cock at 16 and it stuck…..but only when guys shot it on her. Swallowing soon followed.

On a personal note from Alice, PLEASE STOP COMPARING ME TO LINDSAY LOHAN! One starred in Mean Girls. The other will star in Mean Girls Getting Gangbanged. Both will be Mercedes Benz owners who crash them in accidents fueled by fast living and a lack of concern for the safety of others. Party on, Alice. Party on!

I don't understand, Brandon. You usually upload more photos -- the girl's bunghole, waiting to be penetrated; the whore on her knees, waiting for your load. Where are the pictures?

Not enough of Powder's crack rock in the world would I believe that hog looks anything like Lindsay Lohan. And 18? She looks like a 46-yr-old truck stop waitress. She knows how Dirty Deedz likes his coffee.

Gia....be nice. She is your skin flick sister.

Who is she borrowing lingerie from...DeBella?

Sucking dick at 16?....Talk about a very very late bloomer.

And doenst everyone swallow their first time?


I been doing it all wrong this whole time.

"Who is she borrowing lingerie from...DeBella? "

No. Some new porn girl named Lynn Zee. Admit it! She's Lindsay's dopplegangbanger. TMZ.COM where are you???

On a different note, Alice's cocksucking performance will only anger the person who wrote me the following on www.myspace.com/brandon_iron

"u cannot fuck girls born in 1990 and since u fucked haley sweet whos 18 born in 1990 february and also u have touched a girl that was born same year as jonbenet ramsey who would have turned 18 on august 6 , 2008 born 1990."

Dear Mr. Irons,

Thank you for hiring Alice in these stressful times.

Could you please return her to the stable as soon you're finished with her?

Thanks, Farmer Fred

Ate teen, man. Ate teen.

On a totally different note, I opened up an e-mail from a travel agency, the title of which is Fresh white powder is calling your name! It's for ski trips to Aspen and Breckenridge.

Uh huh.

Hi thanks. I will take the white powder AND the ski trips.

I would love to see my reflection in the "snow" covered hills.

I have a special ski lift you can ride on and I will make a blizzard on your face. Not the tasty Dairy Queen treat sold at reasonable prices nationwide.

C'mon folks, we all knew Brandon was gonna go back to his old ways. We had a good run, my Canuck brother....

If another 18 year old Lindsay Lohan look-a-like who swallows comes along, I'll gladly make the same mistake over and over.

Hohan lookalike?

Kinda looks like Supernanny to me.

Mind you,I would totally wreck Jo Frost.

No worries. It's all good.

As Brandon always says "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder". But I think Brandon has both contacts in the same eye.

I said "beer holder."

the wasted alice bell returns whos be banged by the unpopular sean micheals

brandons alice lol

What a shame that 2 of your 15 posts were wasted on this thread before you were sent to purgatory. For your next user ID, I suggest samg or samh or sami.

All I want for Christmas is for you to be interesting and not the huge disappointment you've been so far.

Shoot that fucking tattoo guy....what horrible lines, he couldnt even do that and its not even intricate.

I think shes cute as hell.. i have a thing for glasses and brown hair though:) The Tats are HORRIBLE as all tats are:(
Very pretty gash though...

Very nice pussy on this one. My compliments to the chef.

She's kinda dumpy Bi. Whatev.

^ I've come to the assumption that Vampires don't discriminate blood types. They just want their fix.

btw where is Brandon ? dead by a valtrex overdose?

I am doing physical therapy several times a week. Terrible accident. Bruised ego. My doctor is wondering why it has taken over a decade to heal.

You obviously coughed your "fail" into his face last physical, lil guy. Get better or get broken, yes.
2257 works both ways, aids monkey.
lol.. Way to fuck up the national healthcare, ya facist.

Aids monkey?? Are you sure you aren't talking about ____________ (insert name here). I am the gonnorhea gorilla. You have me confused.

If you’re in a war, instead of throwing a hand grenade at the enemy, throw one of those little baby-type pumpkins. Maybe it’ll make him think of how crazy war is, and while they’re thinking, you can throw a real grenade. -Jack Handy

LouCypher doesn't own any weapons. Judge's order. Besides, he knows that I have the only working boomstick between us. The only thing he can blow up is his doll. Does it really feel like Jenna Jameson, Lou.....really?

Ugh, this broad is chunky, with a cottage cheese ass and horrible tats that look like a drunken 3rd grader did them. Only positive is that when she bends, over and pulls that sloppy ass tight, she her lil pink turd cutter looks good.

She reminds me more of Janeane Garofalo. I like the bloated nerdy look so I'd Alice.