Burg, I am always happy to indulge, humor, and answer anything you throw at me!!
1) Canola oil.. so no gettin smashy on that!! It wont get you drunk, just covered in slime that wasnt on the to-do list for the day. BUT!! I can fake intoxication and tell you anything you wanna hear my friend!!

2)But of course, no need to ask even! I would be honored and take it as a compliment!!