I have a small, private collection of asshole shots that are --- how can I put this delicately -- "special." Like a foot with 6 toes, some assholes stand out because of their over-wrinkliness. Others are in dire need of a good bleaching. Still others have soul patches of hair growing around the crater like weeds.

I only wish the advice from "Das Boot" would apply:
German UBoat sailor #1: Do you have hair in your nose?
German UBoat sailor #2: What?
German UBoat sailor #1: I said....Do you have hair in your nose??
German UBoat sailor #2: Uh...yes.
German UBoat sailor #1: Great! I have hair near my asshole. We should braid them together."

No, I'm not joking. This dialogue really did take place in a major war movie from 1981. War was hell but the real battles were fought nose to asshole in submarines 200 feet beneath the Atlantic.

Is this not the strongest evidence for a Gay Mafia in Hollywood? I think so. A Gay Mafia that infiltrated the Nazi war machine only to fall prey to their own perversions.

My treatise on cum-eating called www.loadmymouth.com is one man's attempt to get society one step closer to the paradise enjoyed by the Taliban in Afghanistan.

My point? Das Boot is a damn fine movie that was nearly ruined by Germans who were somehow more perverted than Steve Holmes. That says a lot, people.